Eva 🌻 > Recent Status Updates

« He’s dead. He’s been dead for years, and I never came and saw him because I was too scared of the past. »
C’est violent de relate à ce point

And he saw me; drank in every ounce of my essence and presence, and it felt like I could breathe again.

'If you're not going to drop him as your advisor, then I'm picking you up after your meetings with him.
That's not necessary.
Maybe you don't think so, but for my sanity it is. Now let's go back out there before Rhea thinks we're actually making babies.'
SEEEIIGNEEEUUUR LEVIIIIIIIIIII

I know you didn’t ask, but you look okay too. Beautiful, actually.
🥹

But when I registered the absolute devastation on his face, my heart refilled with the hope that he might feel the same way.
Ten minutes later, he broke my heart. And I didn’t see him for four years.

And beneath his benign reply, I sense a warning. Of something he can’t even mention in front of his own team.

« I thought Peeta would like this better. » he answers carefully.
Peeta ? No, it’s not about Peeta. It’s about the Capitol and the Gamemakers and the audience. Although I do not yet understand Cinna’s design, it’s a reminder the Games are not quite finished.

It's the Capitol I hate, for doing this to all of us.
Gale's voice is in my head. His ravings against the Capitol no longer pointless, no longer to be ignored. Rue's death has forced me to confront my own fury against the cruelty, the injustice they inflict upon us. But here, even more strongly than at home, I feel my impotence. There's no way to take revenge on the Capitol. Is there ?

You have to win, she says.
I’m going to. Going to win for both of us now, I promis. I hear a cannon and look up. It must be for the boy from District 1

Remember, I tell myself, you’re the hunter now, not them.

And for the first time, I have a plan. A plan that isn’t motivated by the need for flight and evasion. And offensive plan. « I think we’re going to have to fix that, Rue. »

« Couldn’t sleep, either ?
Couldn’t turn my mind off. »

Without thinking, I pull an arrow from my quiver and send it straight at the Gamemakers’ table. The arrow skewers the apple in the pig’s mouth and pins it to the wall behind it. Everyone stares at me in disbelief.
Thank you for your consideration

She has reminded me why I’m here. Not to model flashy costumes and eat delicacies. But to die a bloody death while the crowds urge on my killer.

«  Sometimes I pass something that catches my eye, or ear, and I think, Gabe would love this; or remember when, together, we loved that? I pause, grateful to run into him again. »

« It’s not fair he died at 29. It’s not fair he died when we were in this complicated state. There was a throbbing meaninglessness that could at any moment spread into an ache and pull me apart. Over time, I did think about it less, but when I did, this wide gulf would open again, and even if I didn’t fall in, just walking the perimeter of it was miserable. »