Amour > Recent Status Updates

Here we go again

There’s no winning with you . . . Goodbye Julian. Bye Ballentine xx
(😭😭😭)

“A love like ours—? Are you joking?” I give her the magic smile. “We’re what the poems are about”—give her a little poke in the ribs—“they’ll write TV shows about how much I love you.”

“I’d like you to let me go now, Magnolia.” “Why?” I ask, even though I think I know why. “Because it’s what needs to happen for you to be okay,” she’d say. “And you will be okay.” I nod a lot. “How do you know?” She’d look at me, the slightest bit offended and indignant. “Because I’m leaving you in the most capable hands.”
(IM CRYING AGAIN🥺🥺)

“She’s the only thing I’ve ever properly wanted in my adult life and I’ve got her. She is the home I’ve spent years building. And I don’t have any regrets—”—BJ

“Billie made me love you in a new way,” I tell her. “That was the biggest shift, you know? If you’d asked me before that I would have said I always loved you in this like absolute, sort of—I don’t know—I guess, like, star-crossed kind of way, but then after that—” I smile at her, weary from the thought of that day—this day, I s’pose—nine years ago I was unreasonably in. Hopelessly in 🥹

there are many hats a man can wear, many qualities a person can possess, so many things a person can be, and yet none will destroy you faster than pride.

I come from a good family, everyone knows that. My parents were great, roof over my head. I never wanted for much, really, and still. She’s the only home I’ve ever been interested in having. Her body is the walls, heart’s the ceiling. I’ll live here forever.
(Redemption arc of BJ is everything)

“He’s being good to you, though?” Jules asks, watching me, and I realise we’re pulling up to our street. “Very.” I nod. He nods back. “Good.”
(I’m sobbing 😭)

“In another life, yeah?” I nod and offer him a weak smile. “I’ll meet you there.”

Julian- “Was I ever in with a shot?”
Magnolia- “In this world,” I give him a delicate look, “with BJ?” I shake my head. “I’m sorry.”
( 😭😭😭)

I love him like you might love a star.—My heart hurts

death doesn’t really take any prisoners, does it? Doesn’t really discriminate, it takes the chances it gets.

Hard to quantify, actually. What do I have to show for this life? Her. It’s her. Loving her. That’s all I’ve got, and he’s saying I’ve not even fucking done that well.

“How many loves do you get in a lifetime? That’s a question I’ve wondered before . . . If you ask The Sun, I’ve had far too many, and in some ways that’s true, I have. But actually, I’ve only had two great ones.” I avoided the eyes of both Tom and Christian as I stared at the only great one I have left.

I love how it feels to be needed by her. I haven’t found a better high, and I’ve looked everywhere. Only thing that comes close is being wanted by her, but even then it’s not the same. Want is a luxury, but need is necessary. Can’t do without. It’s an inherent purpose.—BJ

“I’ll always love you, Hugh Biggs,” Liz said when she rounded the table and stopped in front of me. Inhaling a quivering breath, she leaned down and pressed a kiss to my cheek before whispering, “No matter what.” And then she was gone.

“Claire told me you started seeing someone,” she whispered, reaching over the table with her free hand to stroke my hair. “I want you to know it’s okay.” I broke down. I couldn’t help it. Right there in the middle of school, I cried my fucking heart out.
(My God how I’m gonna wait for the next books this series is goddam 5 million ⭐️ ‘s)

“I want you to have the best life imaginable. Nobody deserves it more than you.” “Liz…” “And I want you to move on from me,” she said, choking on the words like they physically pained her. “I don’t want you to feel guilty about it or think you’re doing something wrong, because you aren’t. Because you are too amazing of a person to spend your life stuck on a fuckup like me.”
(Literal pain😭)

“I know you need to stay away from me,” she breathed, body racking with tremors. “And I know why you can’t be my friend anymore, but I just want you to know that I am so grateful to have had you in my life.” A pained sob escaped her when she said, “I’ll never have a greater friend, Hugh Biggs, or a greater love.”
( This book is so damn sad😭😭😭😭😭)

THE MOMENT I LOCKED EYES ON HER IN THE COURTYARD, EVERY HARD-EARNED SLIVER of my battered pride evaporated. As for my heart? It returned to her like a faithful boomerang. Because unlike my brain, it couldn’t be tricked into forgetting about her.
( I’m unwell 💔)

I’D LONG SINCE ACCEPTED THE KNOWLEDGE THAT I WOULD ALWAYS LOVE LIZZIE Young. My heart didn’t have an eject button; therefore, she would never lose her place inside of it. She just had to change spots if I ever found someone else.—Hugh

“Then what happened?She decided this,” I heard myself admit, and Christ did I hate the way my voice cracked when the admission escaped my lips. “She doesn’t love me anymore, Mam.” “I don’t believe that for a second,” Mam argued gently. “Teenage girls don’t cry over boys like this when they’re not in love.” That hit me hard. Fucking gutted me. Tore my heart to ribbons
(Not me sobbing again😭

Part 19: The Great Betrayal

Which begged the question, how could Johnny relate to what I was going through with Liz? How could he understand that a girl came before rugby for me? He couldn’t. Maybe one day, a girl would walk into his world and bring him to his knees, like Liz did to me, but until that day came, it was easier to say nothing.
(Yeah and that would be Shannon💗💗)

There wasn’t another person on this planet I could give myself to like I had given myself to her. She could do whatever she wanted to me, and I would lie down and take it. Because I was stuck on her like glue.
( it breaks me to know where they are now and I don’t even know when the next book is coming out )

“Don’t regret me, Hugh,” I said quietly. “Never,” he vowed, embracing me with tenderness. “You’re the only part of my life I can’t plan for.” He pressed a kiss to my lips. “And the only part I can’t live without.”