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now what the hell is bicycle on the sea

i reread this book every spring and every fall
from the time i was 11 until i turned 17. i have the same copy i had in 2014 and looking at all the annotations i made, at 12 and 13 and 15, feels like rereading an old diary or having a conversation with a younger me. hi evelyn.

i’ve never known sickness -or sorrow, or disaster, for that matter- not to unfold, eventually, like a flower or a good memo. we're required only to keep looking. seymour once said, on the air, when he was eleven, that the thing he loved best. in the Bible was the word WATCH!

and poetry, surely, is a crisis, perhaps the only actionable one we can call our own

samuel hamilton and adam trask said “we cant name these kids cain and abel bc it would be too on the nose, so we’ll just call them cal and aron, which is totally different <3”

i like how cathy has all these meticulously laid plans but then every couple chapters she has two drinks and ruins her own life again

what the FUCK just about every other sentence kicks me full force in the stomach. too good to pick favorites but a few that stuck

“his conscience bridged him to his brother and did his pain for him the way at other times he had done his homework.”

“i love you better. else why would i have given myself the trouble of hurting you?”