Alex Weller > Recent Status Updates

Just read the seventh story, "Gray Matter". During a snowstorm, a few old-timers at a convenience store learn from a local alcoholic's son that the man drank some poisoned beer that turned him into a gray bloodthirsty jelly monster. The store owner delivers some beer to the monstrosity with two others, but opens fire at the thing, which is already multiplying, while the other two run away. Overall, great story!

Just read the entry for April 18. Charlie and Burt do the Rorschach test again, but Charlie remembers his failure the first time and accuses Burt of bullying him, after misunderstanding Burt's instructions from the first test. Burt and Prof. Nemur realize Charlie's progressed mentality and convince him it's not bullying. During the test, Charlie is finally able to imagine pictures in the ink. Awesome!

Just read the entry for April 17. Charlie has a nightmare where he becomes illiterate and asks a coworker to write a progress report for him, only to get punished for dirty things the coworker wrote. This triggers a lost memory from school, where he asked a classmate to write a valentine for a girl he liked, only for the classmate to write dirty things, which the girl's brothers beat Charlie up for. Damn!

Just read the sixth story, "The Boogeyman". Lester Billings visits Dr. Harper and explains how the boogeyman killed each of his toddler children one by one in the night, after he and his wife stopped having them sleep with Mommy and Daddy. But at the end of the story, Dr. Harper turns out to be the boogeyman, come to kill Lester. Holy shit! Overall, great story!

Just read the entry for April 16. Charlie's still angry at his coworkers for making fun of him and plans to get real friends once his IQ has doubled. He doesn't know what an IQ is, but when he asks, everybody gives him a different answer, and he gets confused. He has to take another Rorschach Test in two days. He forgot what it is, but he'll learn soon. Hopefully, this one goes better.

Calvin is Spaceman Spiff once again, trying to run back to his spaceship from a disgusting scum being. But Spiff is too late, and the alien grabs him before he can get inside. In real life, it's his teacher trying to get Calvin back inside because recess is over. Of course.

Calvin complains that it's not fair that his parents get to stay up late but he doesn't. When Dad tells him the world isn't fair, Calvin complains that it's never unfair in his favor. I think we can all relate to that, Calvin.

Calvin must have done something really bad to Dad's car. He asks Hobbes a bunch of hypothetical questions that imply he did something that caused the car to go MIA. Calvin and Hobbes are now planning to flee to Mexico to avoid the wrath of his parents. Boy, is Calvin gonna get creamed for this.

Just read the entry for April 15. Charlie is reading a lot of books now. Aside from novels, he's reading books on history, geography, and arithmetic. But Dr. Strauss doesn't want him reading books on psychology without permission, afraid that it will confuse him and make him think about theories instead of his own thoughts and feelings. Good advice, Doc.

Just read the entry for April 14. Charlie goes into Dr. Strauss's office to talk about his memory. Dr. Strauss tells him that while he may not understand his dreams and memories now, they'll start to connect as he gets smarter, and he'll learn more about himself. Charlie's definitely making a lot of progress here!

Just read the entry for April 13. Charlie has been staying home from work after his recent discovery about his so-called "friends", but he feels better for finding that out. This morning, after he wakes up, he suddenly recalls a memory of being too scared to approach a toy peddler during Christmastime, and the passing children making fun of him, despite his ignorance. So that's more of Charlie's backstory there!

Hobbes wakes up from a dream he had where he fought a ferocious weasel. He asks Calvin what it means, and a wounded Calvin responds that Hobbes is sleeping on the floor tonight. Yeesh!

Hobbes has burst a seam, so Mom goes to get her sewing kit. Hobbes isn't happy and complains about it. Calvin asks what's the big deal about getting a few stitches, and Hobbes says it's because Mom never uses anesthetic. Can't say I blame you there, Hobbes.

Calvin pretends to be Spaceman Spiff again, ready to fire his blaster at a Zarg. In reality, it's Susie. The two are in class, and Susie threatens to have him hauled to the principal's office for shooting paper clips at her. Calvin's response is to imagine that his blaster just got jammed. Good decision, Cal.

Calvin and Hobbes follow Calvin's map to dig for buried treasure. They successfully unearth a buried wallet full of money. But Calvin reveals it's Dad's, and Calvin buried it last week. Somehow, I feel like Dad is not going to be very happy.

Calvin's ready to take a bath and puts his rubber ducky in first. But not as a companion. It's to test for sharks. Uh, that's ... nice, Calvin.

Calvin wants to meet a little boy from Communist Russia with dreams of travelling to the free world of America, so he can tell the boy how awful America really is. His parents are making him eat lima beans for dinner. Hate to tell you, Cal, but in the year 2026, there are worse things going on than kids being forced to eat lima beans.

Calvin and Susie are having lunch. After criticizing Susie's bologna sandwich, Calvin imagines his lunch bag coming to life and attacking him, but he manages to kill it with his thermos until it bleeds jelly. Susie now knows why this seat wasn't taken. Words of wisdom, Susie.

Just read the entry for April 10. Charlie is invited to another party, where his "friends" do more cruel tricks, including sticking their feet out to trip him while he dances with a girl and making him eat wax fruit. He realizes right then and there that they were only pretending to be his friends so they could laugh at him, and he leaves the party. That night, he has a wet dream about the girl he danced with.

Finished "The Mangler"! A terrified, insane Hunton runs to Roger Martin's house and frantically tells him about the Mangler and how it might get out, before passing out. As Martin goes to get the phone, he realizes it's too late. The Mangler has already gotten out, and is approaching the house. Better start running, Martin! Overall, pretty good story!

Hunton and Jackson arrive at the laundromat to perform their ill-fated ritual. It starts off well, with the holy water putting the Mangler in pain, but Hunton soon realizes everything is going wrong. The Mangler rips itself free from the concrete floor and lunges at them both, eating Jackson while Hunton runs away. Holy shit!

It's revealed to us something that Hunton and Jackson don't know. Adelle Frawley suffered from indigestion and took stomach tablets for it, a box of which she accidentally dropped into the Mangler once. Unfortunately, the stomach tablets contain a chemical derivative of hand of glory. Looks like Hunton and Jackson might be fucked.

After analyzing several methods for conjuring demons, Jackson deduces several methods could also have contributed to the Mangler's possession. But the best way to get rid of it is with holy water, Eucharist, and Bible passages. Jackson is grateful that the demon was not conjured with the hand of glory, or else it would be too powerful for them to face. But now it's time to kick some demon ass!

Since they know nobody will believe their story, Hunton and Jackson are stuck having to exorcise the demon from the Mangler themselves. But they don't know which demon could be in it, so they'll have to be very careful, or else they're fucked. Damn.

Hunton and Jackson visit Sherry Ouelette, who feels she is to blame for the events going on with the Mangler. When Jackson asks her if she's a virgin, the horrifying truth is driven home: Sherry is indeed a virgin, which means the Mangler is indeed possessed. Uh oh!

Roger Martin calls Hunton to tell him about Stanner's incident with the Mangler. Afterwards, Hunton decides to go see Sherry Ouelette with Jackson and ask her about it. Here we go.

While Stanner and Herb Diment, the maintenance man, are doing early maintenance on the Mangler, it comes to life and sucks Stanner's arm in. Diment tries turning the Mangler off and even pulling out all the fuses, but the machine won't turn off. Diment has no choice but to chop Stanner's arm off with an axe to save him. Holy shit! There's your proof that the Mangler's possessed.

At a washateria, Hunton tells Jackson what Gillian told her. Jackson has read about demon-summoning spells, a lot of which involve the blood of a virgin. If Sherry Ouelette is a virgin, her blood may have caused the Mangler to become possessed, even though Hunton doesn't believe it. Somehow, I feel like we already know the answer to that question. This is Stephen King, after all.

Just read the entry for April 8. After reading a grammar book, and with a little help from that TV, Charlie has finally gotten the hang of punctuation. He goes and reads over his progress reports and offers to fix all the mistakes he made, but Miss Kinnian tells him to leave them as they are, so they can see his progress. Charlie's really coming along nicely!

Hunton visits Gillian in the hospital, who tells him about the accident with the steam line, along with so many other issues with the Mangler, like bolts falling off and workers' dresses getting caught. But all these issues started after a young worker named Sherry Ouelette cut her finger on a clamp while tightening the feeder belt, then bled all over everything. Sounds ... pretty ominous.