Dead Inside > Recent Status Updates

“I just laid there for a while looking up at the stars and hating myself and my life and everyone in it.”

“Once you think you know someone and get comfortable enough to be vulnerable around them, it is the ultimate betrayal to realize that person is not who they said they were.”

“Is it a choice if there is only one option?”

“this life, these memories, maybe just want to convince myself that the good stuff actually happened, that I didn’t just dream it up in the darkest moments.”

“Just as she raised up, she watched the man with his massive erection fully embedded in Jonathan’s torn rectum, lift the sledgehammer and cave in her brother’s head like it was nothing more than a rotten jack-o’-lantern.”

“He’s putting in an effort tonight, it’s the most complementary he’s been since I refused to perform oral on him a couple weeks ago.”

“He hated his life more than anything, but was too scared to end it on his own.”

“You don’t care that they were fucking you while you were passed out?”

“The dark and angry music and the dumb satanic messages, the obsession with death and horror, it all seems so unhealthy.”

“When the Ambien runs out, I begin gobbling everything in my cabinet—Xanax, Vicodin, Percocet, Valium, and even a few stray Dilaudid and a lone tablet of Demerol.”

“I call Beatrice a few more times and keep getting her voicemail, so I chew three Ambien and sit crying on my futon until the blackness inside of me spills out into the world and swallows it whole.”

“More teeth cracked as Callie effectively face fucked the pastors wife with a loaded gun.”

“Every time I open the door into the hallway waiting area, I want to kill myself.”

“The kind of people who saw themselves as unique, while conforming to the norms of nonconformist.”

“Think of me while you’re in there, remember what we did tonight while you finger yourself and put your thumb in your asshole.”

“Mom always ate vitamins when she got sad,” Emily said quietly, “but I don’t think they made her happy.”

“I could smell them. Mud. Filth. Evil. “The Pig,” I whispered”

“I’ve been sucking this world’s dick since I could remember, what was one more going to do?”

“I wasn’t someone who liked talking about all the fucked up shit that happened to me much either, it was easier to try and forget about it or pretend it hadn’t happened.”

“The many colors around him slowly started to transition, when he gazed out the window of his car Toby felt more like he was looking through a kaleidoscope than examining nature, the textures of the trees grew more wavy and surreal, some of their barks looked like they were melting.”

“The sourish scent stunk of outdated dairy, spoiled seafood, and asparagus tainted urine.”

“C’mon, you ugly motherfuckers!”

“Just how does a man, who can’t move anything but his mouth, eyes, and a few fingers, kill himself? Well, one way is to chew off your own tongue and bleed to death.”

“I glanced at a darkened hallway at the end of the room, the stench of rot was very strong there, and black flies crawled upon the ceiling and walls, I’ll do you last, I whispered to the dark.”

“Well..hell I don’t know, bring a big fucking stick or something.”

"Don't you call my mother a stupid bitch! That's Dani, and she's a dumb fucking cunt, thank you!" "Ah, Dani. Dani the dumb fucking cunt. Yes, sounds about right."

“Ryland didn’t mind air travel but returning to Pennsylvania filled him with such sour dread that the only recourse was to take two Valium and remain inebriated for the duration of the flight.”

“She seemed dead somehow, but still very much alive. He sympathized with that, feeling like he was very much dead inside as well. It's not that he didn't feel feelings, but rather that the only thing he had felt since he was seven years old was pain, sorrow, fear, and misery.”

“He was his father’s favorite punching bag, and was the target of a few goons at school.”

“As she went down on him Ryland’s eyes kept moving to the stuffed animals on the dresser, they were watching him, judging him for some unknown indiscretion of which only they were cognizant.”