Clara > Recent Status Updates

I’ve been listening to this in baby steps cause I was busyyy doing cool stuff on my trip

Now I’m on my ride back, but will be away for a few days again tomorrow, so maybe this will be the longest read everr

desperate for another comfort read

I was in need of a palate cleanser
And I think this might be it
Though with a foggy-ish brain I might miss the pint of this?
So far I felt kinda seen….

But as always: a bit bored by some middle aged white dudes musings

oh booo
I just wanna hug her and put that mothers head on straight

Why am I CRINGING so hard?

Hoping for the comfort I felt with “fake skating”

ooh okay and now I found some books but they mean soo much to me & for some reason that scares me so much right now

am I scared that they’ll move me too much?
am I scared that they’re actually shit and I’ve been lying to myself?
am I scared of feeling anything?
am I scared of being disappointed?

all of the above probably

feeling soo homesick for a book rn without knowing which one (??)

I actually feel like I could CRYY

now I’m trying to figure out *which* book exactly I’m longing for or what else I can read to soothe this aachee

*the drama is onn*

And when the authors note absolutely sold me on this && revealed the topic of insomnia I was like: this is perfect.
I need to start a tag for (absence of) sleep related books I start after particularly bad nights

No, seriously, I walked by a graveyard this morning – one that I pass often – and I really really wanted to go in there
I couldn’t, cause I had a dog with me, so I remembered this book existed & immediately started listening to it

I loong for the graveyard

OBVIOUSLY it was him
OBVIOUSLY.
Shit dad

you neeed to talk
you neeeeeed to be fucking honest, this is soo ANNOYING & agitating

ughhhhh I love ittttt

I kinda hate that it’s basically ALL miscommunication
And it feels sooo tropey sometimes
While also being kinda tender and tangible
Something about this just makes it at the same time fun and awfully frustrating and boring to me
I just wanna fast forward it 😫😫
Buttt it’s wintryyy

Ok I think I’ve decided on this now, I’m looking for a light read ANDD wintry vibes (!!)
So I feel like this might fit pretty well

Unfortunately I feel a bit bored with this already, but I’m trying to embrace the calm & I have free will and can always take a break and read another book!

like I actually want something wintry rn
FOR ONCE I do
And I can’t find anything
Damn it
But It’s gonna be okay

Well amazing, those two books that I really want to read right now are not available :|
And of course my stubborn (& probably autistic) ass has real difficulty with moving on and engaging with other books now

what do I read noww

Noooo like a lot about this is unfortunately OFF imo
Something about the structure, the mc, the other characters…
Something makes this feel unreal & flat & tedious while ALSO being really really enjoyable, fun and gripping
Sooo confusing and unsatisfying
Feels like it would’ve needed another good edit (most arrogant thing to say EVER ik)

but evidently I’m *bingingg* through this, this book is a pretty good time

soooo many thoughts

hun just tell her the truth
like literally just…
don’t lie to her again

This book doesn’t have any business in making me feel *thiss* agitated
like, goosh the drama 💅💅
Don’t play with my heart, body and soul like thatt
But I’m like actually really invested, this has become kinda really good

Somehow obnoxious, annoying, infuriating and frustrating but also…. I’m obsessed…?
That combination of very conflicting emotions within me is confuuusingggg, but somehow this truly *is* shit & great at the same time
Still, this is veery long
Like…
It kinda feels like a draft and like it should’ve gone through some editing, which it probably did, and that truly unsettles me

Ok my therapist doesn’t allow me to continue listening to this rn so I’ll take a break and try to find something else