Julia > Recent Status Updates

Well shit, that’s rotten luck. I’ve never been married so never had my wife/husband kidnapped. But I known a few married people, they would probably have to pay someone to kidnap their partner. Guess this must be a rich person problem

Oh damn poor Mitch, will miss hearing the scouser accent in my head

Hmm, I wouldn’t label a police report as a ‘lullaby’ but to each their own I guess

Interesting

Damn, dating for months now Chris and you’ve only now asked her to be a lookout?! Wonder why she puts up with you

THERES A SEQUEL?!?! SOMEONE DECIDED TO WRITE ANOTHER ONE and GOT PUBLISHING?!

‘I start to run, and she yells after me, laughing, “Clara, you don’t know the way!”’

It’s giving, movie scene where a character gets into a cab and when the driver asks “where are you going?” They say “home”🙄🙄🙄🤣🤣

A river of what? Please stop🤣🤣🤣

You would do what for food?!

‘unsure if someone as huge as him would hear my tiny reply.’

The amount of eye rolling I do whilst reading this book, it’s a miracle my eyes haven’t gotten stuck

“Good boy, cry for me just like that.”

🤣🤣🤣😭🤣😭🤣😭🤣🤣😭🤣🤣
The fuck

What does ‘oily blood’ smell like?

‘like peanut brittle with cricket legs, or cotton candy twined with spider silk.’
Oh yum my fave

How? This is your first revel?!? How do you know he’s outdone himself!!?!?!

‘I just wanted to blank you’ GURL hahahaha

Girl please stop being so thirsty I’m embarrassed for you 😒🙃

Did the author get ai to describe a rat monster?

Replaced their ‘spinal column with one of silver.’, like how???

Didn’t you call her a whore like a chapter ago?

You knew him for like a day?!

So a Christmas candle, minus the waxiness

“Relieve yourself. Now.”

Nothing sexier than a man commanding you to pee

‘“Seems you still have wood here.”

That’s pretty funny ngl hahaha

Can’t believe I’m agreeing with a man, this book is awful

‘laughing with their mouths full…’

That’s the single most disgusting thing I’ve read today

Ugh

Sickening

I hate this book, whoever voted for it should be shamed😒

Yes, I too kiss people to calm them down, works a treat

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
Oh god, of course you would associate it with that part of male anatomy