Kestrel > Recent Status Updates

Every now and again, I can’t help looking around thinking about how lucky I am to live here.

gratitude writing


reality check
reborn

hard truths
hard reality about getting 30s

A Cathartic, Funny Portrayal of Quarter-Life Crisis

epilogue

"Either way, I tell myself, even if it is shit and even if I haven’t found the thing I want to keep doing forever . . . at least I’m trying."

i just wanted you to know that this is me trying 🥹🥹🥹



"I want to hear about other people’s lives, because I don’t hate my own."

why dwell on the past when the future is brimming with possibilities

ch31

The whole thing was a fantasy that collapsed like a house of cards.

pining and yearning for the past is useless bc it's already over what more do you want. its never meant to be


max was bored and he just used her


tarot reading is very timely

cathartic rebirth

a cathartic relatable quarter life crisis


relevant and timely

ch30
You don’t really love me, but you love that I love you. You love having me waiting there, hanging on for you, like some kind of sad, adoring . . . backup option.

ouchhh

max u pathetic liar

blinded by love

worshipping someone just because you love them

every contemporary romance i read leads me back to the secret of us album

this is so in tune with the days bc tarot reading is very popular nowadays

ch 26
why didnt leila tell becky immediately that she no longer lives with their father ahha


we sometimes unconsciously paint someone in a good light even if in reality they are bad for our health. we gaslight ourselves just to make give them a space in our lives just because we like them too much we are getting blind by the truth and reality. we patronize them. saint

But from what I’ve seen, he doesn’t seem to offer you much except helping you stand still.”

shes stuck in the past and being with max makes her believe everything is okay and nothing is wrong in her life because she refuses to acknowledge them and so does max.


max is bad for becky's health. max is just trouble. he is just hanging around because obviously he knows becky still has feelings for him and he enjoys it. he relish

he creates this bubble where she thinks when they are together they are invinsible and untouchable and they can celebrate the good old times. max is a bad influence to her. she thinks highly of him because he never once challenged her thoughts or actions or even argue with her. she feels safe because he lets her vent out and he will adds more fuel to the fire

isnt max a red flag? leaving becky always hanging and waiting for him? like a dog waiting for its meal once he hears a bell pavlov's experiment


yeah max condones all becky's wrongdoings like lavishly spending, bitching about other people's lives and not talk about real things like her job and her love life.

h 26

But I wonder if I’ve been choosing what sticks, forgetting things I didn’t want to see, and building my own reality because it was easier for me to believe my friend’s relationship was terrible.


we gaslight ourselves sometimes

selective hearing and seeing

ch 24
sometimes we unintentionally cut people out



I could have set small boundaries and asked for what I wanted, instead of keeping everything to myself and letting resentments build and build until they exploded in a fit of anger.

we always interpret things because we dont always get to see two sides of a story

she needs to start living her life, not just going through each day, bitching and moaning about the life she has. because that's what grown-ups do. they figure out something and try to make it work.



inspiring yet snapping hard truths right in front of you

"Inspiring and delivering hard truths right in front of you."

all her icks about her friends, max also has them - a flirt, moving in with her girlfriend. max is just a drug she got used to and can't moved past on. she should let the past go, move forward and know what she wants. not just fall back to her old ways.

ch23

wtf becky you're gaslighting yourself


we should not patronize people and put them on a pedestal just because we love them. loving someone can also sometimes be too much.


if you feel stuck, you dont mope around. you get up and get out.


you stand up, create a plan and find your way out
find your escape

ch22 oh girl max is bad news i think


we sometimes glorify people out of habit. we cant see any faults on them because we keep on turning a blind eye

ch 21

i have this inkling max is the not the one. becky is just clinging to the past. overly attached to the golden days of her 20s

“You’re the only one who’s been acting like a kid, Becky,” she says finally. “Just you.” Her use of the word “kid” reminds me of the first card in the tarot reading that started all this. Six of Cups. Overgrown. She’s wearing a fairy-tale costume that no longer fits, living in the past.


ouchhh that stings a lotttt

quarter life crisis


a wrong mindset and point of view can get the best of us/swallow us whole and make us believe to the lies we are telling ourselves

whether we do it on purpose or not, we have the victim complex on us. we want others to see how pityful our current state is. but we make no effort on changing it and we behave icily and likes to isolate ourselves and shut everyone down

there is no harm in trying and putting on effort

ch 20
becky being bitter and jealous about her friend's lives that she started self-pitying and made this imaginary wall between them

she stopped trying. stopped on putting on effort and actually make her life more exciting. she stopped doing anything and yet she hated the life she lives. yes the irony but i relate to her so much

ch15
ohmygod
worst feeling in the world! realizing you are replaceable at work

your whole life crumbling in front of you and your support system leaving your side one by one ohmyghod

cathartic

how will becky's life unfold now
what are you going to do if you screwed up big time and has nowhere to go

going through a crossroad right now in life and i heavily relate to becky sans the part where she is yearning for her unrequited love ahah


i gave you my prettiest years


final destination lmao

ch 10
this ia giving kristen stewart I lit my universe on fire and I watched it burn
makes me so curious how will becky sort out her life and where does she go from here


so disastrous

i cant think of becky without thinking of taylor's not becky meme lmao


my friends are as tired as my mum. so saddddd

im the problem it's me at tea time everybody agrees 😭😭

some harsh truths are never meant to said face to face thats why we write them in diary or in becky's case right them in a letter


the saltburn reference lmao

going through conversations ive had over and over in my head. ohmygod iluv u becky

Your mom organizing your 29th birthday party is kind of crazy lol

Don’t get cocky when you see success. You’re not as big of a deal as you feel. And the feeling fades. What remains is the eternal joy of getting to do work you love.

Stop waiting for permission and prepare to do the work. There are no big breaks. Only tiny drips of effort that lead to waves of momentum.


It really irks me when the same concept is mentioned again.

Some concepts were repetitive and go round in circles. Some lines hit you home. A so-so self help book.

We are waiting for your words. Longing to be changed. Will you share your art? Will you believe you are a writer and start writing?

The faces I knew so well – that would age and wrinkle, with haircuts that would come and go, and lines that would deepen. Some from laughter, some from sadness. Time would march determinedly on, and we would hold onto each other determinedly as it did so.

long live all the magic we made i had the time of my life with you