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NEZHA

'it's the cruelest thing i could do'

i am. broken. i knew this was going to hurt but holy shit

'you're hurting me'

r f kuang i will NEVER be able to see this phrase ever again in my life without thinking about them i can't believe you've done this ;3;

'She recognized the way he was looking at her. It was how she’d once looked at Altan. It was the way she’d seen Daji look at Riga—that look of wretched, desperate, and reproachful loyalty.

It said, Do it.

Take what you want, it said. I’ll hate you for it. But I’ll love you forever. I can’t help but love you.

Ruin me, ruin us, and I’ll let you.'


THROWING UP EATING GLASS THROWING MYSELF INTO A VOLCANO

'I thought I couldn't deny you anything. But I can, I always could, I'd just never really tried'

AGONYYYYYY

I FUCKING KNEW THEY WERE GOING BACK TO SPEER I AM GOING TO BE SICK

'and if you're not with me, you'll burn too'

EVIL EVIL EVIL

REBECCA THOSE LAST FEW PAGES OF CHAPTER 33 WAS ABSOLUTELY FUCKING EVIL HOLY FUCK

WHY AM I CRYING ABOUT THE POPPY FIELD BLOOMING IN TIKANY

VENKA

'Rin, he's on Speer'

four words that just send a fucking icy chill down my back REBECCA WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS

'Kitay had been the first to reach out with his fingers, and then all three of them were holding hands, Nezha and Rin on either side of Kitay, and it felt and looked absolutely, terribly wrong and still Rin never wanted to let go.

Was this how Daji, Jiang, and Riga had once felt? What were they like at the height of their empire? Did they love one another so fiercely, so desperately?'

SOBBING SOBBING SOBBING

'the unwritten rules hung in the air, reinforced by every passing moment that blood wasn't spilled. No one would lift a weapon. No one would fight or flee. Just this night, just this moment, they had entered a liminal space where their past and their future did not matter, where they could be the children they used to be'

HEY REBECCA?????? HEY???????? HELLO??????????

'his face spasmed, as if he, too, was struggling with thoughts he could never say out loud'

'it would be so easy to kill him'

'but she couldn't make the flame come. That required rage, and she couldn't even summon the faintest memory of anger'

'if she could remember how to hate Nezha, she would have killed him'

REBECCA YOU WANT ME TO SUFFER

'She opened her eyes, confused, then glanced up. A great shield of water stood above her. Beside her stood Nezha, hands stretched to the sky.'


'She couldn’t fathom why Nezha had saved her. Nor could she understand the way her heart twisted as she watched him walk forth, arms spread and vulnerable, offering himself to the beast.'

REBECCA YOU'RE TRYING TO KILL ME OH MY GODDDDD THE WAY MY HEART ACHES

rin nezha angst is high in this one, lads, hoo BOY!!!

'in her daydreams, whenever she'd fantasized about the moment that she would truly, finally kill him, he had always burned'

vs

'she's the only divine thing he's ever believed in. The only creature in this vast, cruel land who could kill him. And sometimes, in his loveliest dreams, he imagines she does'

this parallel made me want to eat glass!!!!!!!

every. single. scene with Jiang made me want to die lmao

'she loved him like a father once' OUCH

the *constant* reminder of rin and kitay's bond/their literal soul bond destroys me.

'fight well. keep us safe. I love you.'

'we're bound. your pain will always be mine'

Rin stopping at nothing to rescue him. Kitay always keeping her grounded and not being scared to show her how she's fucking up and going down a dangerous path. They make me INSANE

started this in December of 2025, hit a depression spiral, read some more, another depression spiral. This isn't the best book to read when you're depressed honestly lol

you're going to be amazing ✨

hear that, babe? we're legends 🔥