Sarah > Recent Status Updates

there is nothing romantic (god forbid hot) about someone “licking into” someone else’s mouth while kissing and I wish someone told the author this before this book got published

“I’m coming to the cottage” 🥹😍🎉

“I just figured I’d scream my little heart out later into my pillow.”
“That’s some grade-A compartmentalization.”
“Thanks, it’s the childhood trauma.”

IM SORRY BUT YOU’RE MUCH TOO POOR TO BE TALKING TO ME LIKE THIS 🤣

“How would you like it if someone was wearing a shirt featuring your butthole Carl?!”
“I don’t stick my butthole in everyone’s face when they’re trying to sit down and eat.”
“Well EXCUSE ME for showing affection I mean REALLY”
😂🤣😂🤣

🤯🤯🤯

“Did... did you just rip your dick off and throw it at me?” “I’m going to do it again if you don’t let me in.”