Miss Asima > Recent Status Updates

"The future you have tomorrow won't be the same future you had yesterday." "Some people are just born human. The rest of us, we take a lifetime to get there."

"Listen up. Rant would tell people: "You're a different human being to everybody you meet."

"The truth is I wasn't a rocket scientist to begin with, and every day I'm losing ground. I'm not stupid, but I'm getting there."

"Because the only difference between a suicide and a martyrdom really is the amount of press coverage." "If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, doesn't it just lie there and rot?"

"You realize the agent was right. You've never seen a crucifix with a Jesus who wasn't almost naked. You've never seen a fat Jesus. Or a Jesus with body hair. Every crucifix you've ever seen, the Jesus could be shirtless and modeling designer jeans or men's cologne."

"...In case there's a sniper outside, I open the blinds and stand my gross obese body in the window. Please, anybody with a rifle and a scope. Shoot me right here. Right in my big fat heart. Right in my little wiener."

This is a DNF for me. Don't want to and I don't think it's worth the time. Maybe someday.

"From up so high on my ladder, the thin bendable little arms and legs of the girl make me look again and again and wonder if someday I could be a pedophile."

"And maybe this is just a trick of the light, but I've eaten almost the whole lobster before I notice the heart beat."

I love this man. Never fails to entertain me.