Shannon > Recent Status Updates

I still don’t understand what makes Elías such a bad guy at this point 😅 relatively speaking, compared to the other characters, his self-loathing is wayyyy misplaced. And honestly I think Carolina should get off her high horse with him considering her situation with his father and all that drama. It’s interesting that I don’t respect most of these characters, or like them at all, but the plot is interesting

I think one of my favorite things about Cañas’ books is how clear she is about her main characters for the most part being very clever women strategizing in a system intrinsically built against them

I know we are living in Times™️ but… I do think… this is a great series to read if you are feeling the Times™️ and want not to be alone in it. Just saying… that’s all I’m going to say for now

SOPHIE WHY?!?! MY CHILD!!!!!

Reunited with my FAVORITES and I am so pleased ☺️ (I would probably do awful things to protect Arran and Theo at this point so I live in fear of [more] awful things happening to them)

“It cannot be a mere accident of fate that the visionary male teachers who are offering us messages about ways to care for the soul that will enhance life on the planet are men of color from poor countries, men who live in exile, men who have been victimized by imperialist male violence.”

“Patriarchal culture is a system [men] were born within and socialized to accept, yet in all areas of their lives most men have rebelled in small ways against the patriarchy [. . .] Most men have clearly been willing to resist patriarchy when it interferes with individual desire, but they have not been willing to embrace feminism as a movement that would challenge, change, and ultimately end patriarchy.”

“Men who win on patriarchal terms end up losing in terms of their substantive quality of life. They choose patriarchal manhood over loving connection, first foregoing self-love and then the love they could give and receive that would connect them to others.”

Oh my gosh, I love this book so much. So much.

“This serves to remind us that the will to use violence is really not linked to biology but to a set of expectations about the nature of power in domination.”

She’s been circling around this in previous chapters but the point here, that violence is learned or responsive behavior (IMO often first enacted out of insecurity or fear, that first instinct isn’t to harm but were taught to) is particularly relevant

“The unhappiness of men in relationships, the grief men feel about the failure of love, often goes unnoticed in our society precisely because the patriarchal culture really does not care if men are unhappy.”

(I’m seriously about to wreck this book with underlining, there are so many good quotes to sit with and think about ALREADY)

“It is true that masses of men have not even begun to look at the ways that patriarchy keeps them from knowing themselves, from being in touch with their feelings, from loving. To know love . . . They must be willing to change.”

(preface alone and I’m reminded how much I missed reading bell hooks)

Not me, almost crying on the subway because of this book! (Happy tears? Happy tears!!!)