John Berner > Recent Status Updates

Lily Bart? More like LISA [&] Bart. [Simpson.]

Lily Bart Mall Cop

LILY BART you are making me ANXIOUS

I’ve actually been reading this since May, via the Dracula Daily substack. Real fun! It emails you the letters/diary entries as they appear in real time. Putting this on Goodreads cause now the book is ratcheting up.

coming at this as an American is fun. Okay, so Jean Valjean is an ex-convict. But he’s rich? So what’s the problem??

FINALLY, the sewers!!

they left the part where Enjolras summarily executes a guy out of the musical

Baller Move: stopping your narrative in its tracks to complain about how one of your novels was received thirty years ago.

tbh kinda forgot this whole book is about a murder trial

goodness gracious

taking Fed Courts come fall so it’s like a “if not now, when?” moment with reading these. But reading this in public is a bit embarrassing tbh. I’m a dweeb but not the specific brand of dweeb you’re assuming, I promise.

I dunno how many of you read the article circulating today about ICE recruitment but I cannot stress enough how much book Thernardier is the aspiring ICE agent who resents his HS classmates' Insta vacations and so wants to use his ICE money to buy AirBnBs and get on the passive income train.

https://www.nplusonemag.com/online-on...

Finished ‘Marius’. Man, when this thing decides to move it ~moves.

“modesty, that epidermis of the soul” …okay

love when Hugo introduces a new guy who is clearly Jean Valjean and Hugo pretends he isn’t for 60 pages

nuns

The Waterloo digression… all of my Napoleon podcasts have prepared me for this moment…

Having got to the end of “Fantine” I’ve got to say that the biggest difference so far between the book and the musical is that in the musical the Thernardiers are kinda goofy and in the book the Thernardiers need to be shot.

this book is STRESSFUL

If I were Fantine I would simply file for a chapter 7 bankruptcy and use the federal property exemptions to keep her furniture, hair, teeth, etc.

“‘I propose a toast to merriment. Let’s be merry. Let’s complete our law studies with food and folly! Let Justinian be lord of Misrule and Revelry be his mistress! The world is a great diamond. I’m happy. Summer, I salute you! Everything is beautiful. Flies are buzzing in the sunbeams. The sun has with a sneeze produced the hummingbird. Kiss me, Fantine!’
He got the wrong girl, and kissed Favourite.”

okay I think this book might take over my life for the time being

this bishop guys is just Benitez from the hit movie Conclave (2024)