Melissa > Recent Status Updates

DNF. I find it absolutely RIDICULOUS that we can't rate or review this book right now. God forbid someone doesn't like your BS fanfiction. This book is poorly written, it bastardizes our MC's backstory, and it overall just isn't good. But I guess we can't hurt anyone's feelings with a bad rating...
Neil Newbon is a treasure, but even he can't save this book. I gave this one my best shot, y'all.

One thing I'm noticing is that the writing lacks forward momentum. We're doing some things, going to therapy, getting a physical, going to the store, but I don't feel that any of this is pushing the story forward. We're just... doing stuff.

This book occasionally switches tenses, from present to past back to present within the space of a few sentences. I honestly think the book would flow better if it were written in past tense.

"You promised if I give you my game, you'll give me team that can take back what's mine."

This is why everyone thinks this is a ripoff of The Foxhole Court. "Give your game to me" is something Kevin says to Neil in book one. Now, I maybe don't read a lot, but I've never heard that phrase outside of AFTG.

"Alexei's eyes over Spinner's hands. His arms. His shoulders."

His eyes... what? Roam?

"Monarchs don't talk to not Monarchs."

Better phrasing would be Monarchs don't talk to non-Monarchs.

"Over and over and the tear of skin splitting and over again."

Come on. There is a way to do stylized sentence fragmentation, but this isn't it. It still has to make sense in and of itself.

"Constriction closes around his throat..."

This book is about to drive me crazy. His throat constricts. Just say that.

"Alexei fights down a scowl as he drops onto the couch."

You might fight down a feeling, but you wouldn't say that about a facial expression.

"It was Alexei's choice to show him, but still he covets the vindictive wish that he could claw the memory of that night from Noble's head."

I'm beginning to wonder if this author is a native English speaker. There are a lot of phrases/word choices that I don't feel a native speaker would make. Or maybe we just need to claw the thesaurus from their hands.

"Really hates that question even more. Short answer. Long." (in response to: "How has your summer been?")

WTF does this even mean. This author has a short, choppy writing style that often doesn't work. It's okay to write out a complete sentence. Short and choppy can give emphasis sometimes, but use it too much and it becomes a drag to read. And confusing, as in the above sentence.

"Noble only knew he hadn't dropped dead in his sleep because of his read receipts."

Awkward phrasing. You wouldn't "drop" if you were asleep.

I'm about 10% into this, and what I notice right off is the extremely choppy writing style. It often hinders the flow of the narrative, and I find myself having to go back and re-read confusing passages, such as:

"...and now Alexei has to reconcile a year and half worth of resentment with the fact that when push came to shove came to knuckles on bone over and over and over again..."

This needs more editing.

Flying through this. I want to get to the end but I also don't want it to be over!

Disquiet Gods made me a bit nervous about where this was going, but honestly... so far this book is AMAZING and my fears were completely unfounded. I'm loving it

After a year I'm back at it. Halfway through this book has really picked up!

I picked this up knowing almost nothing about it, and I have to say it's the most fun I've had listening to a book in a long time. If you pick this up, do yourself a favor and don't read anything about it beforehand.

Slowly making my way through this. All I can hear in my head is the narrators voice and I wish I had the audiobook!

Thank you Baen for making eARCs available early!! I have been waiting for this book forever

Holy shit, tell us how you really feel about fat people DJ MacHale lmao. This would probably get you cancelled today.

So far I'm liking this even more than the first

I haven't enjoyed a fantasy book this much in a looong time. I'm sad I waited so long to pick it up! It's good!

unapologetically enjoying the hell out of this rn

Any pov that isn't James or Will is aggressively uninteresting

wait where's the lube!!