amanda > Recent Status Updates

now this is something to exercise your critical thinking muscle

GOD AS THE DADDY OF THE DERANGED???????????

bruhhhhhhh

im gonna connect the mc with a case manager

"OH NO THE UNDEAD MAN IS LYING TO ME. OH MY DOGSHIT THIEF COUSIN IS LYING TO ME. WHO DO I TRUST. I HAVE TO FIND OUT THE TRUTH MYSELF."

>> asks his next door neighbour what's happening w the haunted house.

what the fuck is going on

computa does the cat die in craven manor

daniel you IDIOT your fuckass cousin stole your doubloon

OKKK PEDAL TO THE METAL

"His face darkens with embarrassment and anger, perhaps the most dangerous combination of emotions in a man." THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MY BRAIN IS HUGE

I THINK I HAVE UNEARTHED A TWIST

ARE YOU SERIOUSLY TRYING TO FUCKING TELL ME THIS GIRL HAS BEEN LITERALLY SHOT UP WITH WET BABY POWDER AND SHE'S JUST AWAKE. SERIOUSLY????????????

“She drugged me. Your wife—”

“Baby powder,” Ted says. “I switched the heroin with baby powder. You’re fine.”

hate finishing this in bed bc its hot and im cranky