Elijah Manuel’s Reviews > Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda > Status Update

are you kidding me? im upset bc no way abby is blaming simon for him getting blackmailed?? its not like he had a choice bro like what?
pmo…

oh my goodness gracious

PRINGLE AND FINN REFERENCE? “gay book about penguins”

“I’m not holding your hand”
“Okay, but just know that I would.”
Aw Nick and Simon 💖 Love their friendship
Omg so simon is officially out bc Monkey’s Asshole had to go and make that goddamn tumblr post omfg

oh great so. i literally only made two more pages than where i just had beeb and i had to turn the light off bc my parents are driving so im using my phone light to read and its at like 4% 😞
but he is currently JERKING OFF bc the email turned him on <3333 HELPEE MEIEMEMMEEM

help my past status update was also about sex but omg they talk about it alot LMAOOO
Blue just said through an email “I also like to imagine you now fantasizing about sex. I can’t believe I just wrote that. I can’t believe I’m hitting send.” PLEASE 😰😰😰 ESTOY VERY SCARED AMIGOS IM LITERALLY IN THE CAR WITH MY PARENTS AND ITS GETTING UNHOLY. FAST. SIMON IS CURENTLY IN BED WITH AN ERECTION

MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP HAVING HETEROSEXUAL SEX PLS 😭😭😭😭

[ “Israel? They’re from Russia.”
So I guess you learn something new everyday, because I really thought Jewish people came from Israel. ]
😭😭😭😭😭😭

JUST FINISHED FIRST CHAPTER IN THE CAR!! WOOHOO!! the book is very pretty i like the texture on the cover and the color of the pages on the side :) apparently this is the deluxe edition—whatever that means, i dont know if it has to do with the design of the book or what— but enjoyable book so far loll tbh i dont really like simons careless attitude very much right now but im sure he’ll grow on me