⦻ jack ⦻’s Reviews > Watcher > Status Update

“Author note: I hope you enjoyed this spooky, Halloween-themed novella and developed a newfound love of scarecrows. If you find yourself feeling inspired on your next visit to the pumpkin patch, please remember that scarecrows are meant to be observed and hay is rather prickly in the nether regions.”

I’M CRYING 💀

GOURD

“Yes, darling. Come apart for me.”

“If anyone would have asked me two weeks ago how I felt about getting naked in a corn field while a scarecrow watched with a boner, I would’ve asked what they were smoking.”


LMAO

“Cassie, that’s your vagina talking.”


PLEASE 💀

“You are quite attractive when you are terrified.”


I fear that’d work on me

HERE WE FUCKING GOOOOOO 👀

“Who’s there?” I call out



Never say "who's there?" Don't you watch scary movies? It's a death wish. 👻

“I might not have much experience growing vegetables, but I’m fairly certain corn doesn’t groan”


LMAO that’s how I talk too 💀

“I hope they fall off a cloud” made me cackle