Reese’s Reviews > Project Hail Mary > Status Update

MURPHY’S FUCKING LAW

THE FARMS AREN’T LEAKING BUT IN BREEDING NITROGEN RESISTANT TAUMOEBAS, THEY EVOLVED TO SURVIVE BY SNEAKING IN BETWEEN THE MOLECULES OF XENONITE.

RYLAND CAN CONTAIN IT IN GLASS OR METAL OR PLASTIC BUT ROCKYS ENTIRE SHIP IS MADE OF XENONITE. THERES NOTHING STANDING BETWEEN HIS TAUMOEBA AND HIS FUEL I’M GOING TO CRY POOR ROCKY PLEASE WE HAVE TO SAVE HIM

I really hope bros breeding containers or whatever the Taumoebas are kept in are sealed now that he’s gassing the entire cabin at 100% nitrogen. Please no more Murphy’s law

Of course genius engineer Rocky! He melts spare metal parts from his ship and built extra and even more efficient tanks for Ryland so he can go home.

They say their goodbyes. Rocky says they can meet again but that was before he found out about the human lifespan.

UGH I’M CRYING OVER A DOG-SIZED ALIEN SPIDER I HATE IT HERE. NOW THEY’RE BOTH GONNA BE ALONE ON THEIR JOURNEY HOME IM SOBBING

Up to Taumoeba-62 now! Ryland tried scrubbing the engines and gassed it with nitrogen to kill remaining Taumoebas but two of the engines won’t clean. He jettisoned them so there’s only 6/9 tanks remaining.

The trip home will take 5.5 years and he won’t have enough food to last since it was supposed to be a suicide mission. Rocky’s foods are heavy metal

Like antibiotics, they slowly cultivate nitrogen-resistant Taumoebas at increasing nitrogen percentages so they can survive in Venus (3.5%) and Threeworld (8%). Taumoeba-35 is successful and they make it back to Blip-A! They agree to exchange a laptop for xenonite.

“Modifying an alien life form. What could possibly go wrong?” Famous last words… I’m so scared please give a happy ending to Rocky and Ryland

“‘Yes yes. I make now. We are team. We fix this. No be sad.’ He skitters down the tunnel toward the dormitory.”

I LOVE ROCKY HE’S SO SMART AND CUTE AND GENUINE AND WHOLESOME 🥺🥺🥺

THEY FUCKING DRAGGED HIM ONTO THE HAIL MARY AGAINST HIS WILL AND THEN GAVE HIM FRENCH AMNESIA INTERROGATION DRUGS SO THAT HE WOULD FORGET. THATS WHY HE COULDN’T REMEMBER ANYTHING, NOT BECAUSE OF THE COMA OH MY GOD STRATT IS TERRIBLE

Oh also the Taumoeba won’t grow on Venus or Three-world so they’re screwed! They can live in the engine tank though so I feel like they’re just missing a variable. I have faith

This gotta be Murphy’s Law because how is anything and everything going wrong!?! They extracted the predator coined “Taumoeba” but it freaking escaped and went to eat the FUEL TANK ASTROPHAGE so the entire ship loses power and both generators are down.

Ryland has to go grab Astrophage from the beetles thru EVA so Rocky can make a new engine to thrust them back to his ship. Rocky’s a genius tbh

Builds a device to extract the sample from the box without exposing it other temperatures/pressures. Rocky is so smart and can build anything!

We learn that there was an Astrophage explosion nine days before launch that killed the primary and secondary science specialists that were selected for Project Hail Mary. But we already knew something happened to them because Ryland is on it duh

Rocky wanted to eat in private but for science, he let Ryland observe. He defecates and eats using the same orifice and then immediately gets paralyzed and sleeps kind of like a food coma.

They discover that Erids and humans are vaguely vaguely related. OH AND ROCKY HAS A BUNCH OF EXTRA ASTROPHAGES SO RYLAND CAN GO HOME! YIPEE! Cause Erids didn’t know about time dilation and relativity (I’m confused too tbh)