Gerhard’s Reviews > The Supersonic Phallus > Status Update

"“It’s Government. And earlier he was telling me what they’re really worried about: mass hysteria. You know, like the Salem witches? Or St. Vitus’ Dance in the Middle Ages - whole villages of peasants dancing themselves to death?"

I was put on Earth to do my best as a journalist to bring truth to light—battle the forces of darkness, ignorance, obfuscation, repression and misdirection as best I could with the powers at my command...

"Of course as a married man there was no question of my unzipping him, but we scrubbed each other while monitoring each other’s breathing, our excitement mounting, until—uttering those gasps that are the most eloquent parts of human speech—we cried out in a long, shared orgasm."

Of course, the UFO would appear at that exact moment ...

"Now that F.D.R. was safely dead, the backlash against the New Deal was coming into gaudy blossom, preaching fear and hysteria about Communists, liberals, women, homosexuals, Negroes, Mexicans—you name it."

Sounds familiar ...

"What did it look like? What kind of shape did it have?"
"Like the biggest prick you ever imagined," said Andy, grinning at Dean, "but please don’t quote me."

In science fiction (I’m a big fan of Frederick Pohl, Arthur C. Clarke, Robert Heinlein) space aliens are green or red with snakelike limbs and elongated heads, but secretly I think my fellow humans about as grotesque...

“Bad feeling it’s the Russians,” one man said.
“Better Russians than Martians?” a woman ventured.
“Reds or Martians, what’s the difference?” scoffed another."