kashiichan’s Reviews > Gallery UK The Mental Load Diaries How I learned to juggle life, love and the neverending to-do list. > Status Update

"…and while some of them may look like your balls too, they won't all be the same. I highly recommend looking closely at your balls and making sure you're handling them in the most efficient way. Okay, that's enough about balls now."

"…at all. Despite that, so many of us increase our mental loads by adding these ‘Not Balls’ into the mix: / NOT BALLS AT ALL • Fixing other people's problems • Getting involved in other people's business • Talking about other people when they're not in the room • Worrying about what other people think / These are my balls…"

"…buying birthday cakes • Ironing • Being at every school/sports event • Answering every WhatsApp/email/phone call • Deadlines • Pleasing everyone • Dressing your kids in stylish outfits • Being on time every time • Being polite and well-behaved • Getting 10,000 steps in • Not eating carbs • Not eating sugar • Any kind of restrictive eating / And then we have my favourite type of balls, which are actually not balls…"

"…love and who love you • Taking accountability when you fuck up • Making sure you are there for your kids • Being a thoughtful and kind partner • Practising an attitude of gratitude • Getting enough sleep / PLASTIC BALLS • Any and all housework • Meeting friends for social events • Hair and make-up • Worrying about your weight • Getting dressed up • Cooking meals from scratch • Kids birthday parties • Baking vs…"

"…meltdown. I might not always be as polite as I could be, but I can always say sorry when I drop that ball. I might not eat as well as I want to for a few days, but that's okay. And if all that means that my brain is a little lighter to carry around with me, then that's a win. / Let me show you my balls... / GLASS BALLS • Paying your bills • Looking after your health and wellbeing • Being kind to the people you…"

"…and, when this book is done, I will have the bandwidth to be able to pick them up, unharmed, and carry on where I left off. / Almost all of the plastic balls (which, incidentally, were the ones that I held on to the tightest, and that often felt the heaviest) were actually really easy to put down temporarily when I needed to. So, sure, my house might look like a crack den, but I'm not on the verge of a total…"

"…that I needed to make sure were the foundation of any actions I needed to take. There may be times when these are the only balls you can handle—and I've had to learn that's okay… / Some balls—the plastic ones—I didn't even worry about dropping. There were coffees I couldn't make, gym classes I had to cancel, and other stuff that I didn't even allow myself to worry about. Those balls are bouncing around somewhere…"

"…at any given time blew my mind. / When you start to see all the balls as different and individual in their own right, you can start to understand that the juggle doesn't have to be such a struggle. The glass balls are balls that, obviously, need to be protected at all times. Dropping the glass balls can have serious consequences, so of course those need to be prioritised. / They are things like paying your…"

"…I'm carrying, valiantly, on my shoulders, like Atlas bearing the weight of the globe… / What if all balls are not created equal though? What if some balls are big and some are smaller? What if some are heavier and some lighter? What if some are glass and some are plastic? It's not a concept I came up with—I can't remember where I heard it—but the idea that we can choose which balls to juggle based on our capacity…"

"…balls or we are going to have to get comfortable with dropping a few? Or we could consciously put a few balls down? / It's easy to say, but I know it's not easy to do. I'm a ball hoarder. I don't like to put balls down and I definitely don't like dropping them. In fact, I'm not even sure I know how to put balls down. In my mind, they aren't always individual balls. Instead, it's one massive mental load ball that…"