Sam Lofgran’s Reviews > Les Misérables > Status Update

I feel like Marlin the clownfish in Finding Nemo when he says to Squirt the turtle, “you’re really cute, but I don’t know what you’re saying!” except that it’s me to a long-dead Frenchman, telling him that yes, he can write well, but I need him to explain to me why the last two hours of the audiobook have been about convents (while also at the same time respecting his hustle bc paid by the word)

javert is nothing if not consistent in regards to his Complete Inability to Chill

I really hope victor hugo didn’t think he was being sneaky every time he reveals that the dramatic stranger who is doing way too much in the plot to be a rando is jean valjean

love that victor hugo was so inspired by ABBA’s “Waterloo” he decided to write dozens of pages about it

rip jean valjean you would have really benefitted from zoloft

I miss the priest and I hate privileged and obnoxious 20-something-year-old men

I’m already unbearably sad so this is going to be a mess