Zoë’s Reviews > Good Inside: A Practical Guide to Resilient Parenting Prioritizing Connection Over Correction > Status Update

"what allows two people to get along and feel close—they each know that their experience will be accepted as true and explored as important, even if those experiences are different. Building strong connections relies on the assumption that no one is right in the absolute, because understanding, not convincing, is what makes people feel secure in a relationship."

"There's nothing more valuable than learning to find our goodness under our struggles, because this leads to an increased capacity to reflect and change. All good decisions start with feeling secure in ourselves and in our environment, and nothing feels more secure than being recognized for the good people we truly are."

I think a lot of institutions and systems would benefit from this message!

It's funny that while making the case that we *are* good, she starts from the assumption that we were *raised* badly, or at least in a traumatic way that necessitates healing.

"if you're reading this book, that tells me that you're taking on the role of cycle-breaker.... You are willing to take on the weight of the generations before you and change the direction for the generations to come. Wow."

"And when I say 'good inside,' I mean that we all, at our core, are compassionate, loving, and generous."

I obviously knew this was the premise of the book, but somehow I was surprised (and not entirely convinced) to hear it applied to adults and not just misbehaving toddlers. Something to interrogate about my own beliefs there—if I accept that toddlers are good inside, why wouldn't that apply to adults too?

Only a couple of pages in, and I can already see that this book is the antithesis of the standard approach taken by B's daycare, in a good way—the question is, what to do about the daycare?

The author opposes the "perfect system to extinguish undesirable behavior and encourage... behavior that was more compliant and more convenient". The daycare wants compliance and convenience. I'm glad I'm reading this book.