Gerhard’s Reviews > A Prayer for the Crown-Shy > Status Update

Dex sighed. “A leech is a person who takes without giving back. It’s a metaphor.”
Mosscap considered that. “I don’t think it’s very kind to use an entire subclass of animal as a metaphor for behavior that you deem unseemly.”
Dex threw up their hands. “Well, we do it, all the time.”

“I’m surprised you weren’t familiar with crown shyness,” Mosscap said. “You’re so knowledgeable about plants.”
“I know herbs and ornamentals,” Dex said. “I don’t really know trees, just some of their names.”
“Well, that’s the nice thing about trees.” Mosscap put its hands on its hips as it looked around. “They’re not going anywhere. You can take all the time you need to get to know them.”

Dex opened the door to find Mosscap on the other side, knuckles raised mid-knock. In its other hand it grasped a polished wooden cane, which it leaned heavily on. “Good morning, Sibling Dex!” the robot said. “Congratulations on having sex last night.”

“If I wanted to harvest propolis, I’d have to stick my hands in a bee colony,” Mosscap said. “I’d be very well acquainted with where it came from. But if I chose casein for my replacement part, I’d never know what cow I owed my thanks to.”

There were houses made of plastic, of old tires, of shipping crates painted every color a human eye could perceive. Cracks bestowed by age were patched with modern touches, like mycelium or bacterial cement, giving an impression like that of broken teacups mended with gold—a lasting beauty, born out of brief destruction.

The thing about fucking off to the woods is that unless you are a very particular, very rare sort of person, it does not take long to understand why people left said woods in the first place. Houses were invented for excellent reasons, as were shoes, plumbing, pillows, heaters, washing machines, paint, lamps, soap, refrigeration, and all the other countless trappings humans struggle to imagine life without.