cloz ’s Reviews > Notes from Underground > Status Update

"Devil take it," I thought, "I'm flattering her. That's vile. Or maybe it's good..." She was silent.

That's how this cursed chain is.

"Not all, of course-but even so it's much better than here. A whole lot better. And with love one can live even without happiness. Life is good even in sorrow, it's good to live in the world, no matter how. And what is there here except ... stench. Phew!"

"And that's what's bad, that you don't think. Wake up while you have time. And you do have time. You're still young, good-looking; you could find love, marry, be happy..
"Not all the married ones are happy," she snapped, in the same rude patter.

It's my duty. And so, it's decided; I'm flying now to slap his face."

I also once had a friend. But I was already a despot in my soul;

It infuriated me that he knew me by heart.

But how much love, Lord, how much love I experienced in those dreams of mine, in those "escapes into everything beautiful and lofty": though it was a fantastical love, thoughit was never in reality applied to anything human, there was so much of it, this love, that afterwards, in reality, I never even. felt any need to apply it; that would have been an unnecessary luxury.

This was the point, that I blindly believed then that through some mir-acle, some external circumstance, all this would suddenly extend, expand; suddenly a horizon of appropriate activity would present itself, beneficent, beautiful, and, above all, quite ready-made

Dreams came to me with a particular sweetness and intensity after a little debauch, they came with repentance and tears, with curses and ecstasies. There were moments of such positive rapture, such happiness, that not even the slightest mockery could be fetin me, by God. There was faith, hope, love.