Jessica Yu’s Reviews > I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression > Status Update

“Shame hounds boys and men throughout most of their lives for two reasons. First, since the standard of masculinity against which most boys and men measure themselves is unrealistically narrow and perfectionist, virtually no one feels he sufficiently measures up. Second, since masculinity is conferred more than won, since it represents mem-bership, not a state of being, it is always in danger of being revoked. One can always "go over the side without a ripple."