sof’s Reviews > Blue Ticket > Status Update

“All I ever wanted was freedom, all I wanted was to know that my life wasn’t moving towards this dead end, but I knew it was, ever since I was twelve years old. I knew the shape of my life before I even understood what it meant.”

“All my life I’ve been told I can only be complete if I grow something inside of me and bring it into the world.”

“My body was the only ocean they had ever known.” — of motherhood

“We were so careless with our girls. Defence was a learned behaviour. I had learned it. I was passing it on.”

“I was thinking only of goodness, and how far away it felt from me. Goodness was a country I could not get to. Goodness did not live in hotel rooms. Goodness was a state of permanence, not like the varying states of my body as it now existed.”

“What made a father? What made a mother? What was the thing I was lacking?”

“If you were a blue-ticket your life could change at any time, you could make it change at any time, and we were alternately complacent and anxious about the possibilities contained within that freedom.”

“I was forever amazed at the place your mind could compel your body to go. It didn’t feel strictly possible that they could act in such opposition, but then the proof was everywhere.”

“Be careful in your wanting was a slogan written on the wall of the clinic. I must have read it five hundred times over that one year alone. My legs swinging back and forth on the orange plastic chair of the waiting room.”