Avery Northern’s Reviews > Black Butterfly > Status Update

Sir, for a dollar, use a word that would challenge a fifth grader.

Bro needs to stop calling himself crazy and mad. It is rare that I see anything so mind numbingly ordinary. You are not crazy or mad. You are the blank-eyed cattle that homeless schizophrenics are afraid their meds will turn them into.

This guy says, "we" a lot for someone incapable of recognizing the interiority of other people.
"We are already dead 😞" what's this "we" business. Just because you are so utterly devoid of original thought that you may as well be dead doesn't mean the rest of us are.

This one reminds me of a bit I saw once with kindergarteners drawing Obama and all the drawings had him shouting, "CHANGE!"

Are you...are you actually trying to convey an impossible conundrum here with this "if I'm not crazy then I won't feel and if I can't feel then I'll go crazy" thing? If so, you did a horrible job at it, but kudos for actually trying to convey something.

However, I don't believe that this was actually intentional. I think Drake is too stupid to do this on purpose.

Get Robin Williams's name out of your mouth.

"Don't think." Cool, you definitely have that part down. "It just complicates things." How would you know? You are incapable of even glancing at complexity. "Just feel, and if it feels like home then follow its path" okay but you don't feel any more than you think. If you were capable of feeling emotions more complex than those of a silverfish, you wouldn't write this badly.

"how distant have we all truly become; to believe that the only things that make us feel like we are part of each others' lives, are the machines we created that drift is all further apart." First of all, your punctuation is shit. Second of all, OMG computers are making us LESS connected?! What a truly original thought that nobody has ever stated before!
Get a life, man.

"to change the world we must heal our women"
Thanks but maybe instead of healing us you could just stop doing the stuff that puts us in need of healing.
"Because it is the women who teach us how to love"
We are clearly not doing a very good job of it.

Most original and deep poem so far lol.

Thinking kills? Then Robert M. Drake should have nothing to worry about.

I'm trying to read this as quickly as possible because I try really hard not to DNF books and DNFing a quick read feels so dumb, no matter how bad the book is, but god I can't wait for it to be over.