average human’s Reviews > The Gods Binding: The Valorian Veil Book 2 > Status Update

I stagger into the back of the couch, laying my hand on my erratic heart. This is a reality I can’t grasp. A truth I’m not sure I can face.
They’re the sons of the most ruthless Beginning God. The same one who’s responsible for the creation of the Abandon, the Dark Gods who live there, and the silent war dividing this godly region.
Valories only know what else.
It’s not just the Binding on the side of the Abandon that’s made them as strong as they are. The strength and power he possesses flow through their veins.
Fear pulses through every drop of blood in my body.
My mind and heart war with one another.
The bleeding organ in my chest begs me to focus on the positives. They were worried that the pieces of my soul inside them are the key to keeping me alive.
That means they care.
I’ll be okay. They’ll never let me die.
Really? They’re already dealing with an evil, meddling god—their father. Now you’ve dragged in another. You’ll become too much, and they’ll decide you’re not worth the effort…
No one wants to babysit a grown woman forever.
No.
They’ve already accepted a god’s toying with me. Hell, maybe it’s their father. Maybe it’s just one impossibly powerful, evil god.
Also, two of them have professed they want to deepen our relationship. That’s a dream come true, and it’ll strengthen us. Our support for one another will only grow and become more meaningful.
Uh, not necessarily. That declaration came before the soul revelation. The only one of them to express they’re okay keeping your soul is the one who calls you his little burden…
Fuck…what if I am a burden to them?
The whispers in my mind shout over any other helpful reasoning my heart tries to show me.
A real relationship is impossible now.
The power dynamic tilts too far in their favor. I’ve lived with men who knew they were stronger and never let me forget it.
I can’t imagine multiplying that with godly men.
My strange, unruly abilities don’t compare to theirs, and they hold my soul. This truth adds to the power they already have over me.
And…this is still new.
I haven’t seen their worst. What if their worst mirrors their father’s? At any moment, they could decide, fuck the slow release—we want what’s ours.
They could return to the Abandon, and he’d welcome them with open arms if they swore loyalty.
Then I’d either be dragged along…or forced to stand against them.
It’d be four against one.
“Thayla.” Amick’s quiet tone has me nearly jumping out of my skin.
My ragged breaths echo through our living room, but the otherwise silence coming from them breaks through my panic.
There’s no stopping the tremors wreaking havoc on me right now, but I suppress my desire to run. I force myself to focus on him.
None of them have moved from the positions they were in, but the body language of each of them has changed.
My breathing levels out the longer I observe them.
Amick stands tall, posture perfect, chin tilted, and face void of emotion. Except for his eyes.
Those citrine crystal candies ask me something I can’t quite wrap my mind around. Any other time, I’d never have to decipher anything when it comes to him. Right now, though, his message isn’t coming through clearly.
Kyzen’s shoulders are slumped, and his hands are flexing in his pockets. His smile, if I can even call it that, is sad. There’s an acceptance surrounding him that I don’t understand.
I don’t believe Creed is looking at me but through me. He’s so still. There’s no tugging, no sensation spreading through my heart other than my own panic. Deep inside, though, I sense he’s searching my soul. For what, I don’t know.
Riven…I’ve never seen him so clear. He’s shaking in his skin just as I am, yet it’d seem neither of his two sides is lending him a helping hand. Burgundy and blue glare back at me, not swirling but colliding nonetheless. They’re begging me to react so he can be set free. One way or another.
Their fear is as obvious as my own.
The way they froze at the door speaks louder now than it did then. That was true terror. No part of them would ever think about returning to that place, no matter any power promised.
Shit…the things my Valtrue’s been through.
I can’t imagine the reality of that.
Gods, what was I thinking?
The worst…as you always do.
They’ve had every chance to show me cruelty and never have. Even now, with their truth lingering in the air, they wait patiently as I freak the fuck out.
My secrets were accepted with so much more grace.
The way they’re reacting, what they’re waiting for becomes crystal clear, and guilt slices me in half.
They hoped for the best but prepared for the worst. They’re waiting for the rejection—my rejection.
They’ve readied themselves for my fear.
Of them.
Those fears continue to deepen the longer I study them.
In different ways, they each deflate.
Torturously.
You’re letting your own fears fester, and that’s not fair.
You’re hurting them.
Unlike in my past, where I could find a justifiable reason to push someone away, the madness running through my mind isn’t going to work here. I could sit here and rage that they withheld this important information from me, but that’d make me a hypocrite.
Part of me wants to say Seismet was right from the start. We should’ve opened up to one another. The other part disagrees with that because I know myself. Even at times when I want to dismiss or ignore my flaws.
If they’d dropped this on me within my first month here, you can bet your ass I would’ve stayed as far away from them as possible.
I would’ve run straight to Mellcom…just as I always have.
I would’ve forgiven him instantly because this would’ve frightened me more.
Instead, the silent agreement we all made to keep our secrets close, open up at our own pace, gave me an opportunity to get to know them.
There are too many things, situations that have already shown me who they are. My fears, when I push them to the far stretches of my mind, can’t argue with the fact they’re good men.
Good gods, who spent their childhoods being used and groomed to become monsters. They defied those odds.
Kyzen and Amick may not want to explore a relationship with me anymore after this, but regardless of that, I’m not going anywhere.
I’m not going to run away from them or allow myself to push them away.
“I…” My voice croaks. “I’m not going to abandon you. This situation petrifies me, but…the four of you don’t.”
We all startle as a heavy fist lands on the door. A collective release of breath falls from our chests when no one barges in and the knocking stops.
Silence once again fills the space.
Creed clears his throat, and I turn my attention straight to him. He stares at me, breathing hard as though his trance was broken, but I can’t pull any air into my lungs.
He finally nods, but I don’t know if that means he found what he was looking for or not.
“We can talk about this more later. We’re running out of time. Has Derivius responded to you?”
Riven shakes his head. “No. The fucker is picking a piss-poor time to ignore me.”
Kyzen exhales, shaking his body out as he walks to the back of the couch, grabs my shoes, and hands them to me.
“They’re going to come banging on our door again.”
“Who are they?”
“Kira.” He swallows roughly like the name is made of glass. “He’s brought his guards with him. They’re swarming the house, making sure we come out.”
There’s no escape from this.
“Derivius…”
With unsteady hands, I put my shoes on as I wait for a response and simultaneously listen to the guys work out a plan. It isn’t much of one, seeing as we don’t really have a choice or we prepare for a fight, according to them.
Basically, they declared they’d put me in the middle of them, out of sight, and get ready to face him.
“Listen here, asshole, this isn’t the time to ignore us.”
“My, two of my favorite gods calling me vulgar slurs in the span of a few moments. What could I have done to piss you all off today, little troublling? I’m a little busy.”
I huff and ball my fists.
“Well, get un-freaking busy. Do you seriously think Riven and I would call on you for nothing? The God of Obliteration is here, demanding a meeting with us, so some help would be appreciated.”
The silence that greets me again after waiting for a response has me stomping my foot the rest of the way into my shoe, and every colorful curse I can think of falls from my lips.
“Derivius acknowledged me but has gone quiet again. I told him why we’re trying to reach him.”
“We’ve never had a meeting without him present. This is the first unplanned visit, and I can’t stretch my power to the point of seeing how it’s going to go without completely draining myself.”
“So this isn’t the first time you’ve all seen him since you came here?”
“No. At the start, some sort of agreement was made. Every year until we turned twenty, we had to see him once a year at his temple, the day after the Veiling. It was undoubtedly his way of measuring how much power had been released to us. That stopped, and we’ve only seen him once since then. That was twelve years ago.”
Twelve years…so they were twenty-three.
I’m sure so much has changed in them. I’m far from the girl I was twelve years ago. Eighteen-year-old me was going through all kinds of changes.
Kyzen’s cheeks puff out from the deep breath he releases, then he gives his brothers a tight smile. None of them return it, but they nod in acknowledgment.
Great. This is going to be a petrifying and awkward reunion.
I run my hand down my face as though that’ll wipe away all my fears and replace them with confidence I don’t feel right now.
“What do we do?”
“We’re going to proceed with caution. We don’t have a choice but to go, or consequences come into play. Assuming the same rules apply from before, he can’t take or harm us within his temple that’s here. That goes for us in regard to him as well. Based on why he used to come and the fact that he’s here now, it’s clear he’s been made aware that we have a completed Valtrue.
“He wants to see the power we hold. Don’t give any information away and lie where need be. Let us do the talking and don’t allow him to get under your skin. He has an extraordinary talent for being able to do that to anyone. Keep your cool and do not react.”

All I can do is nod at Amick. I already want to react, but I mentally talk myself down with very clear reasoning. Such as, this is a Beginning God who holds more power in his pinky than I do currently in my entire body. I can’t punch him and get away with it.
A loud bang on the door has us all whipping our attention towards it.
Kyzen mutters a curse under his breath as he peers over at me.
“Out of time. We’ve got to go.”
My shoulders tense as he and Amick reach their hands out to me. This gesture from them even an hour ago would’ve had me blushing, but right now… I can’t tell if it’s them getting me to come on, or if they really want to embrace me.
“No,” Creed barks before I can figure it out. “Have the two of you lost your minds? You can’t let him or his guards see that she’s anything more than our Binder. If he even gets a whiff that she’s important to you two, he’ll zero in on her.”
They all share a look, then turn to me. Kyzen slowly drops his hand, but Amick hesitates.
“Will our pretending you mean less to us offend you?”
My mouth parts and I jerk my head. “I won’t be offended.”
He seems pleased with that answer as he nods and laces his own fingers together behind his back. “Okay. I’ll hold your hand when we return home.”
My body freezes in place as his words settle inside of me. I relax the smallest bit when Kyzen surprises me with a hug and a kiss on my forehead.
“Has everything changed?”
His quiet question roars in my ears.
“I don’t know. We haven’t had a second to consider or think about anything that’s come up. I’m not thinking straight right now.”
“I’m at an advantage, I guess. You’re talking to the being time belongs to about taking time to think. My power’s already slowed down my mind and allowed me to weigh what I need to consider. Owning a piece of your soul only makes claiming every other part of you that much more important to me.
“I’ll prove I can take care of and protect it. I am not—we are not—our father. That may be something that’s running through your mind, and I understand that. So if you need time to think, I’ll give you that time. But in my eyes, my mind, my heart, the way I feel about you hasn’t changed. That’s my decision, little goddess.”
I jump as another round of banging starts at the door, and the booming noise has Kyzen separating himself from me. He gives me a small smile and a wink as he cups my cheek, but it doesn’t mask the seriousness behind the rest of his features.
A knock that’s hard enough the walls rattle has a feral grunt falling from Riven as he marches over to it. He swings it open so forcefully, I’m surprised it doesn’t come off the hinges.
“If you knock on my fucking door one more time, I’m going to cut your hand off, slap the shit out of you with it, then give it to your master as a present.”
He slams it shut in the awaiting god’s face and spins back to us. The deranged smile splitting his lips says he’s giving the man a moment to make his decision. While hoping he makes the wrong one.
Or maybe that’s considered the right one in Riven’s mind…
“We need to go. If they’re growing impatient, that means he is,” Creed declares as he turns from us.
He waits as Kyzen and Riven take my sides, and Amick moves behind me.
Focus. Put everything else to the side for now.
My heart hammers as his hand wraps around the knob. My shoulders rise and fall in sync with his, but they settle when a gentle stroke of a finger runs across my knuckles.
Whether that’s Riven’s way of soaking up some of the chaos he senses coming from me or whatever the case may be, I don’t draw attention to it. I let it be.
The hostility that wafts through our front door makes my nostrils twitch. Not a single being waiting outside is happy to see us. Their power is primed to the point that even my skin feels it crawling all over Creed. It’s infecting the very air with their eagerness to respond to us if need be.
His first step across our threshold is louder than any noise being made outside. The gods that stand a few feet from our front door and no doubt around the house in various spots I can’t see are completely silent.
The few I lay my eyes on aren’t only silent but stiller than statues. I’m not sure they’re even breathing.
Like properly trained Defenders, they don’t budge from their positions until Amick is out of the house and he shuts the door behind him.
My glare scans them as they close in. The more steps we take away from our home, the tighter the circle surrounding us gets.
They look like any other gods here, physically anyway. It’s not their large stature that intimidates me. I’ve grown used to being around big, godly men.
It’s their empty eyes that cause my unease.
Your gaze only reaches that level of coldness when you no longer care.
About anything or anyone.
I sneak a peek over at Yemi’s house, but I don’t dare let my attention linger or appear concerned. When I don’t see any signs of her, I keep looking at the gods as if I’m judging them.
They don’t speak or stare, but they’re monitoring us.
Now that we’ve hit the path toward the heart of the Godsdawn, they march in a perfectly coordinated formation.
Each of their steps matches ours.
My Valtrues’ attention stays forward. Their unwavering concentration has me afraid that one wrong twitch from us will have every enemy god pouncing.
“Seismet…can you hear me this far away?”
I grind my teeth as nothingness responds.
“Uh, V…I don’t know if we work like Seismet and I do, but he can’t hear me this far away. Can you?”
“There are very few barriers within this realm that could keep me from hearing you, Thayla.”
I hold in the sigh that tries to burst through my lips, and I flex my fingers to contain my relief.
“Thank the Valories. I thought it’d be best to let someone know that the God of Obliteration has summoned us to a meeting and we’re on the way to his temple. You know, in case we don’t come back or something. Derivius is being a dick and not responding. Sorry for my language.”
A silent second passes, then a hoot echoes in my mind. “Well, I did not see that coming, unfortunately.”
A snort bubbles in my throat, and I swallow it down. “Yeah, same. A warning of who their father is would’ve been nice.”
“No, it wouldn’t have been. If I had told you, you would’ve handled it worse than you are now. You probably would’ve dramatically attempted to drown yourself in the hot spring.”
“I don’t appreciate you calling me out or teasing at a time like this.”
“Sure you do. I’ve already informed Seismet about what’s going on. He and Verlet are on standby. If things go wrong and you need us, we’ll be there.”
I worry my bottom lip between my teeth. “You can’t join me now?”
“That wouldn’t be wise of me.”
“Why not?”
There’s a strained pause before his sigh vibrates through my mind. It causes chill bumps to litter my skin, and more unease settles in my stomach.
“Many beings are to blame for what happened to my kind, but the ultimate blame is placed on the God of Obliteration. For now, it’d be wise for him to continue believing he killed all of my kind.”
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.”
“You have nothing to apologize for, Thayla. Keep your head about you when you meet him and keep me informed.”
“I will. Thank you, V.”
Anger mixed with sorrow rages through my chest. It has my nose burning and fingers tingling as I clench them repeatedly. Creed stops dead in his tracks and turns around to face me. He steps so close our chests nearly touch.
“Whatever’s wrong, get it out now before we get there.” His quiet voice holds more attitude than I care for right now.
I sneer, then speak in a tone even lower than his. “No need to be an asshole in an already shitty situation. Are you all aware he’s the cause of the Vedarya extinction?”
“What?” Kyzen asks, surprised, while Riven practically growls the same word. Creed’s eyes almost soften as he shakes his head.
“That’d be the most understandable cause. The Vedarya were beings created to guide and lead the Valories’ creations. If their Vedae was headed down the wrong path, willingly and knowingly, it’d be their responsibility to set them straight again or inform the Valories. He wouldn’t have been accepting of that. He’d have seen that as a betrayal from a being that was supposed to be on his side, no matter what.”
I wouldn’t say Amick’s straightforward explanation calms me, but it simmers the rage enough for me to think a little straighter. He’s profiling his father’s actions, just as he does with anyone else when he’s trying to understand them.
I’ve always been able to get a sense of people, but it hasn’t been until recently, spending so much time with him, that I’ve learned to analyze people more deeply.
He’s taught me so much in such a short time…
If the God of Obliteration’s decision to wipe out an entire species was because he felt betrayed, that means he’s dangerously impulsive when he’s angered. It also means he takes selfishness to another level. If he couldn’t have a connection such as that anymore, no one could.
I give Creed a nod that I’m better—if that’s how I can describe the blinding fury I felt—and he returns the gesture. The entire entourage of gods escorting us starts walking as soon as he does. None of them moved any closer or any farther.
They waited mindlessly.
“Reason two hundred thirty-three and reason two hundred thirty-four.”
I peer over at Riven as he bobs his head to his silent song I have no doubt he’s humming in his mind.
“What do those numbers mean?”
“Those are the number of reasons why I’m going to kill our sperm donor. Reason two hundred thirty-three is that he showed up here unannounced and demanded to see us. It displeases me greatly that he’s going to lay his eyes on you. Two hundred thirty-four is because he committed an unforgivable atrocity against those revered creatures.”
“Riven,” Kyzen whispers harshly.
“If we want to be technical, how many days have I been alive? Some odd twelve thousand plus? That’s a more accurate number of reasons, but nonetheless, the two hundred thirty-four is narrowed down and easier to recite. And those are only my reasons. I haven’t tallied up my brothers’. They won’t share with me all the conversations they have with themselves.”

Beside me, Kyzen makes a sound of displeasure, Creed subtly shakes his head, and I’m not sure what Amick does, but my attention falls back to Riven.
To anyone else who’d glance at him right now, they’d more than likely be frightened by the smirk on his face. My heart hurts as I observe beyond that. His smile is painful, not playful.
Damn, Thayla…you seriously had it all wrong.
They don’t want anything to do with him.
They’re nothing like him.
We enter the Assembly silently, and there isn’t another god in sight. No one is rushing to the Hailtorium, the Athenaeum, or the Sanctum. It’s the emptiest I’ve ever seen this part of the Godsdawn.
“Where is everyone?”
“Mandatory lockdown. Depending on when and what a Beginning God comes here for, all others are to return to their homes and not come out until otherwise informed. What more than likely happened is he arrived, called for the High Chancellor, gave his orders to retrieve us, then the High Chancellor sent word of the lockdown before coming to get us. Once he leaves, the Chancellors’ assigned Attendants will start making their rounds to the houses, and the lockdown will be lifted. No one will know who came or why.”
I don’t respond to Amick as we’re steered to a path that leads to the temples. The circle around us grows tighter, and I can’t help but think, how and why has the God of Obliteration been allowed to bring at least three Valtrues’ worth of gods with him?
What if he decided fuck it, seize my sons, then set them free on the Godsdawn? I believe they’d be defeated eventually. Not at first, though, seeing as everyone would be caught completely off guard since they’re in their homes, clueless about what’s going on.
It’d be a bloodbath.
Lambrit, Yemi…
I shake my head to get those disturbing images out of my mind.
My erratic, intrusive thoughts about the guys continue to settle with each step, and my fear fades to a weird sort of acceptance.
Am I still intimidated? Yes. Do I still have worries in the back of my mind? Also yes, but I’m trying to cling to the thoughts and obvious signs that the sides they’ve shown me are who they really are. The current and prime example of their true intentions toward me is the formation we’re in.
As the smaller temples belonging to Domain Gods that’ve truly made a name for themselves thin out and the circle of deadly gods continues to close, the tighter the guys move in around me.
Guarding me.
Kyzen’s and Riven’s arms are practically glued to mine. Creed’s so close, I can’t see around him, and heat from Amick’s body is keeping my back warm.
I know we’ve started coming up on the Beginning Gods temples only because they tower into the sky. The glistening white and gold marble that shines bright is much larger than the Domain Gods’, and they have ample space separating their structures from the next.
I crane my neck around at the last one we passed and catch a glimpse of a smaller replica of an obsidian statue in front, just like at the Sanctum.
Creed’s back collides with my face when he stops walking unexpectedly and his arm reaches around to catch me.
Muttered curses fall from my lips as my fingers tangle in his shirt. I both pull myself closer and push away from his amazing scent and toned muscles that twitch beneath my hands. He doesn’t release me, though, and the others crowd impossibly close.
My cheek stays plastered to his rock-hard back while my eyes watch Kyzen’s scan the gods surrounding us. They’ve each drawn weapons I didn’t realize they had on them, but they aren’t facing us.
“Now, now. Put your toys away before I make a game out of how you all kill each other.”
My lids fall shut as Riven’s chuckle joins the one coming from somewhere in front of us.
He showed up.
Dickhead definitely could’ve responded to us rather than make a grand entrance.
“I won’t repeat myself. Disobey the rules of the agreement and I will lay waste to you all, and your master won’t see his sons because of you.”
“The terms of you being present expired upon the sons’ twentieth birthdays. You have no right to demand a presence alongside them.”
“Kelshin, it’s good to see your nose is as brown as ever. Looking a little blacker nowadays, actually. Anywhos, my required presence expired upon their twentieth birthdays, but my chosen presence did not. You and I both know the clause. It’s not up to you, me, or Kirabaddon if I am here, but the boys. If they wish me to leave, I will. If they want me to stay, I will.”
My fingernails dig into Creed’s back, silently but painfully telling his ass to speak up. I don’t know if they really want him here, but I damn well do.
“Derivius will stay and accompany us as he always has.”
My breath whooshes out of me, and I declaw myself from him. I hold in a yelp when his hand slowly slides from around me and squeezes the shit out of my hip before he takes a step forward.
“If that is your will,” Kelshin, I suppose, grits out.
All the Dark Gods sheath their swords at the same time, then change their formation. Instead of circling us, they now stand on each side, creating their own path for us to walk through. I stare in confusion until Derivius’s voice sounds far closer than it was.
“Boys, it’s very good to see you. Who do you have here?”
My nose scrunches as I scowl at him when he steps into my view. The seriousness on his face, along with his outstretched hand, confuses me.
“This is Thayla Godrun, our Binder. Thayla, this is Derivius, Beginning God of Chaos.”
Understanding dawns on me at Amick’s introduction.
Don’t make it obvious we know each other.
My hand slides into his, and his fingers grip me gently.
“Isn’t this my lucky day? I get to meet not one but two Beginning Gods. Who would’ve ever thought a little troubled girl from Oddian would have all her prayers answered?”
His lips twitch and his blue eye twinkles with the desire to laugh. “It pleases me dearly to make you feel so special.”
He releases me with a small chuckle and pulls both Kyzen and Riven in for a hug. He and Amick exchange a nod, then he lays his hand on Creed’s shoulder.
“Shall we? I’m sure he’s growing antsy by this point, and that’s always a delight.”
His tight smile has me right back on the edge, and I straighten my spine. My eyes scan what’s ahead of us before he closes the gap with his shoulder pressed to Creed’s.
It wasn’t as long of a look as I’d like, but I saw enough. The gods who escorted us here have, in fact, created a path for us. One that leads right past the God of Obliteration’s statue and into his temple.
A dreadful shiver races down my spine despite the impeccable shine of the structure and the chiseled perfection of the stone. Nothing about this place of worship brings me any comfort or peace, like I’ve heard people say they experience when they leave the temples.
I can’t believe that, of all places, this will be the first house of worship I step into.
My stomach is revolting, as are my feet, and I want to turn around and take my ass back home. I’d never make it, though. I have a sinking feeling that if I tried, I’d be causing more problems than we can currently handle.
My unease sinks deeper inside my bones as we enter the large torch-lit chamber, and a dark laugh echoes all around us.
“My sons. Look at how much you all have grown. Come forward and let me see each of you.”

5%

His voice is—I hate to say it—warm and smooth.
If you didn’t know anything about him or who he was, just hearing him speak would have any god or goddess batting their lashes at him. His weird-ass comment, though, has a frown marring my face and the guys tensing.
Derivius subtly steps directly in front of me as they shake off the strained energy and form a line together. Without so much as uttering a word, their footsteps fall across the stone floor in sync, and my heart skips a beat.
I hate the fact that I can’t see anything, and nausea builds in my stomach knowing they’re within arm’s reach of him.
The way Derivius’s shoulders keep twitching in time with Kirabaddon’s cooing and hums of approval leads me to believe he’s laying his hands on them.
That shit makes my fingers tremble.
Valories, do not let my chaotic power do some crazy shit right now.
“Ah, my favorite son. The stories that’ve come out of Hellveilious have made me so proud. I always knew you out of your brothers would please me the most.”
My throat closes and my lids drift shut as another truth filters through the air. I’ve been adamant I didn’t want to hear any of the guys’ stories from anyone but them. This piece of shit just gave me a large insight into why Creed’s the way he is with only a few words.
“What was the reason for this meeting, Kirabaddon?” Derivius makes no attempt to hide the annoyance in his voice.
“Derivius. As always, sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.”
“You know as well as me, if it involves the boys, it involves me.”
Kirabaddon’s sigh—maybe that’s a laugh, I’m not sure—sounds exasperated. Derivius shifts his feet apart and crosses his arms.
Damn…I originally thought having a Beginning God with us as we face another one was a good idea.
Given my position directly hidden behind him and his ready-to-throw-down stance, I’m not so sure now.
“Desperate for their love still to this day. Let us not forget, they are my sons.”
“By blood. Nothing more.”
The weight of Derivius’s words hang heavily in the room. I force my lungs to cooperate so the deep breaths I’m taking aren’t heard. No one speaks or moves for an uncomfortable few seconds.
Finally, Kirabaddon grunts, and his footsteps sound like they’re moving farther away from the guys.
“That’s what’s most important. Now move aside and let the girl introduce herself. You all go back over there to him.”
Fuck.
Gone is that smooth tone, replaced with one full of malice and authority. I wipe the panic from my face as the guys’ eyes bore into me, but the sheer hatred in their features doesn’t help.
My heart pounds in my ears and my palms are drenched in sweat. A soft caress flutters across my chest, and I take in a deep gulp of air as the sensation soothes my soul.
The guys’ bodies practically vibrate as Derivius steps out of my way, but none of them dare to embrace me in any kind of way.
I don’t know how to express my first thought as my glare falls on the God of Obliteration leaning against a carved throne a few steps off the ground. The position of the seat makes me imagine him lording there, laughing at the beings worshipping at his feet.
For some reason, the guys acting like him was a thought that plagued me, but a resemblance didn’t cross my mind.
I believe I had him painted out like his statue outside.
Dark and nothing else. No facial features, emotions, or anything.
It’s incredibly strange and hard for me to understand how they have some of his features yet look nothing like him at all.
I assume it’s the purely evil energy pouring off him that’s messing with my head.
A dark smirk spreads across his mouth as he runs his thumb over his lip. He takes the few stairs impossibly slow, and I make my feet stay put as his power slithers against my skin. The desire to take a step back is so strong, my knees threaten to give out on me.
“Come forward, girl. I won’t bite.”
My teeth grind together, and it takes all my mental strength not to sneer at him. No part of me wants to do as he ordered, but I also don’t want to put the guys in a harder spot than they’re already in.
I force my legs to stay sturdy and take three steps forward, leaving a couple of feet between us. In one stride, he closes the distance, and I swallow down my gasp as he peers down at me and chuckles low.
He has dimples.
The guys don’t, though.
Wait…I don’t know if they do.
I’ve never seen Creed or Amick fully smile.
“Thayla Godrun. I’m thrilled to meet you.”
My lips stay sealed as he continues to run his eyes over me. My mind, on the other hand…
Let’s just say it’s taking a shit ton of effort not to let the hateful thoughts color my face. My wild imagination and the exaggerated scenarios I create have kept me distracted through some really hard times.
They, unfortunately—as I’ve already proven today—can also conjure up some pretty awful things.
Instead of picturing the guys being like their father, my poor muddled mind imagines the guys as innocent children. They flinch in fear from his strong arms or duck their heads as he bellows at them. They didn’t receive tender hugs or bedtime stories.
Realistically, and now that the initial shock is wearing off, I know they experienced far worse.
I can’t let myself dwell on that or I’ll explode.
Every one of my muscles and thoughts locks up tight when he starts to circle me. I’m completely clothed, yet I’ve never felt so exposed.
I’m not sure what he’s searching for, but whatever he’s finding, he’s getting either amusement or satisfaction from it. The same appreciative sounds he made toward the guys, he’s making them at me.
“Kira—” Derivius warns, but it’s too late.
I choke on a gasp as Kirabaddon jerks my jaw up. His power swells and with it, his eyes take a different form. His pure gold irises cloud over with blackness. The only remaining piece of that color is the teardrop shape that’s bled into his pupils.
“Well, you weren’t what I was expecting at all.”
“You’ve done your assessment. It’s time for us to go.”
The breath I’d been holding pours out of me in a slow exhale at Kyzen’s voice. He’s kept his tone light, reasonable, and it gets his father’s attention.
“You’ve all just arrived. My time isn’t nearly up, and I’d like to get to know Ms. Godrun.”
“I know it’s been twelve years since you’ve been here, but I’m confident you haven’t forgotten the rules of this arrangement. You state why you called this meeting or it’s over.”
A diabolical smile replaces the calculating smirk on his lips as he tsks at Derivius.
A shriek tears from my throat when a searing sensation wraps around my waist. I find no comfort in the warmth that battles it.
“Let her go, Kirabaddon.”
My head whips between the Beginning Gods and the ropes of power they both have laced around my stomach.
The power pouring from Derivius’s hand is a glittery blue. Mix it with the black coming from Kirabaddon, my torso resembles a swirling cosmic sky.
“You release her Chaos, or I do more than sense her power.”
A small whimper I’d been attempting to hold in slips free and Derivius’s power snaps.
My body collides with Kirabaddon’s and quicker than I can blink, my arms become tied to my sides with his power, and he pulls me down onto his lap. I don’t even know how he moved us so fast.
I try to steady my hands on the stone throne as his laughing bounces me around, but it’s useless. This rope made of darkness pulls a hiss from my lips as it tightens with every move I make.
My frantic gaze bounces across the guys as their powers surround them. Derivius spreads his arms out, blocking them from rushing forward. The menacing look written across his brow has my mouth drying out.
“You dare dishonor our agreement!”
“Our agreement, Derivius, is in place for my sons. This fine specimen of a growing goddess has no such restraints. You all may leave now if you wish while I speak with her. It makes no difference to me.”
A cold sweat breaks out across my skin as he runs a finger down my cheek. Where we all fucked up is very clearly running through everyone’s mind.
The rules in their apparent agreement were stated that he couldn’t take or hurt them in this temple. Nor could they do anything to him.
Obviously, there’s no shit stated about me, or in any other case, whoever their Binder would’ve been.
My pleading eyes lock on Kyzen’s.
“Valories Law on the separation of Godsden.” His voice booms through the temple. “All Beginning Gods who chose to live their reign beyond the barrier are permitted to reenter the Godsdawn under the agreeance of a peaceful reunion. Any act that falls within the definition of instigation or violence committed to the underling Gods will be viewed as a breach of the agreement. Therefore, the right to retaliation will be allowed.”
Understanding dawns on me, but it brings me a very small amount of comfort. He could very easily decide to break that agreement and harm me. He’ll just have to face the wrath of his sons and Derivius immediately afterward.
Creed steps forward, eyes blazing white. “Think about your actions very carefully. There won’t be any hesitation from us.”
Kirabaddon chuckles against my back. There’s no doubt he can feel my heart hammering where he’s laid his forehead against my shoulder blade.
His hot breath fans across my earlobe as he leans closer. “My, my. You’ve got my sons wrapped around your finger, don’t you?”
I sit frozen as his shadowy-like rope slinks from around me and another whimper threatens to break free of my sealed lips. It’s as if his power tries to suck the life out of me as it goes.
Riven grunts, drawing my attention, but it isn’t my face he’s staring at, and I follow his line of sight.
I desperately want to run my fingers across the bruises that are now decorating my arms. I’ve never felt the combination of both fury and fear like what’s coursing through me right now.
Part of me wants to throw my head back into his nose. To hear his bones shatter would please me to no end. The part of me that’s too petrified to move begs the guys with my eyes to get me the fuck off his lap.
“I mean her no harm, truly, and these little marks were purely accidental. My power was delighted with the strange but addictive way she tastes. Which is honestly surprising. I figured she’d be crawling in Sabelline’s essence.”
Sabelline…
“The Goddess of Seduction?” The words tumble out before I can stop myself.
“What a smart girl you are.” I bite my tongue to keep from popping off at his condescending words, but that fire inside of me is doused once again the second his hand squeezes my thigh to hold me in place.
“We have ourselves a dilemma.”
“Release her and there won’t be a dilemma.” Kirabaddon scoffs at Amick, then stands so quickly I don’t have time to catch myself.
Before my face can become one with the stairs, Kyzen’s power wraps around me. In incredibly slow motion, he catches, straightens, and moves both of us back to the others all in a matter of a second.
“Very impressive, son.”
“I have no desire for your approval. We’ll be going now.”
Kirabaddon chuckles as he waves his index finger back and forth. “That’s not how it works. Really, Derivius, I’m shocked you’ve followed the rules and haven’t explained the agreement to them. Go on, tell them why you can’t leave yet.”
We all look at the God of Chaos. He’s staring Kirabaddon down with a level of disdain that has me nervously preparing my body for a fight.
“What is he talking about?” Amick asks.
Derivius flexes his fingers. “The original agreement was drawn up with a condition that states he has to verbally express to me his reasoning for meeting with you. He’s yet to tell us why we are here. Therefore, we can’t leave until he does. The condition was put in place so when you were younger, he couldn’t persuade or manipulate you all into returning to the Abandon with him. There’s no expiration date on that clause. Just as there’s no expiration that he was granted the right to see you once yearly without your refusal. He’s chosen not to until now.”

My nostrils flare. “Who the hell came up with this agreement? Obviously not them.”
I zip my mouth shut when all heads turn toward me.
“Almost all the Beginning Gods had a say in the agreement, and no, the boys didn’t get to have any input.”
The disgusted glares being shot at both Beginning Gods before us tell me the guys were as unaware of that fact as I was. There’s a lot to that agreement they obviously don’t know.
“State why we’re here. I’m fucking over this,” Riven declares and the room drops a few degrees.
Kirabaddon has given off a nasty energy this entire time, but the disgust and hatred he has aimed at Riven is deadlier than any other look that’s crossed his face.
Riven doesn’t bristle or budge.
His smile grows the longer their stare off continues.
“Disgrace,” Kirabaddon huffs, then narrows his glare on Derivius. “Sabelline sensed her Binding. It was a faint sensation, but she felt it nonetheless. I assumed I’d come here and find that my sons had somehow gained possession of it. Imagine my surprise when I arrived and the High Chancellor informed me they have a completed Valtrue.
“Seeing as I didn’t grant my sons a Binder, but it was no doubt you, I then assumed I’d find the girl crawling in that sweet, seductive essence you released for her. It was shocking just now to find something far more interesting bubbling inside her. Care to explain that?”
Derivius stays silent. That both pisses me off and pleases me. I desperately want to know what the hell is bubbling inside of me, but I one hundred percent don’t want this god to know.
“Fine then, have it your way. Due to your disregard for the rules of those tied to the Messenger and your meddling, here’s what’s going to happen. I give them two months to locate and return Sabelline’s Binding to me, or I claim Ms. Godrun for myself. She’ll return to the Abandon with me and the only way my sons will see her is if they come there for a visit.”
The who?
“Excuse me?” I ask while the others shout, “What?”
My eyebrows scrunch together as I glance at each of them for an explanation. Creed, Kyzen, and Riven share my confusion. Derivius’s face is full of fury. He seems seconds away from exploding, but it’s Amick who steals my attention.
He may appear bored and uninterested, but I’ve seen that look of utter concentration plenty of times.
He knows something.
“You’re playing a very dangerous game, Kirabaddon.”
“You should’ve thought about that before you once again interfered with my sons’ lives. They’re not yours. Never have been and never will be. This time, you will learn your place.”
He takes the steps from his throne at a harrowing, leisurely pace and we shift our feet. His eyes scan over us, and his smile grows as he takes the five of us in. When he settles his gaze back on Derivius, the energy in the room grows darker.
“You haven’t claimed her yet, which tells me you have no plan or desire too. The others obviously don’t know of her existence. If they did, she wouldn’t be standing here before us. That leaves me. I sense she has a good bit of me in her, and I have four very good and deadly reasons to give her more.
“If you step out of line and tell the boys or her more than they’re allowed to know, that’ll truly be the end of you. I’ll make sure of it. Inform the High Chancellor of their permission to leave Godsden, and all questions or concerns are to go through you. With my permission, you may oversee this quest. If they fail, so do you, Chaos. Return the Binding, or she comes with me. Tamper with the Binding once it’s located, and there will be consequences.” His sneer shifts in my direction and morphs into a sickly sweet smile. “I look forward to adding you to my collection, Thayla Godrun.”
He starshoots away faster than Derivius can charge him.
The five of us stand here in a state of confusion, anger, and really, I don’t know what else. I can’t get my thoughts straight as the yelling and curses falling from Derivius’s mouth are too loud to drown out.
My eyes widen as he marches up to me and grabs my hand. “Meet us at your house.”
Without so much as a warning, I’m sucked into a starshoot along with him and my mind tumbles. The millisecond it takes to move from the temple to our living room has my body swaying into his side.
“How the fuck did you just do that?” I grumble.
“All Beginning Gods can move other beings as we please. All Gods can move ungodly beings if need be. You okay, little troublling?”
“I’m—”
“I’m going to fucking kill you,” Riven shouts seconds before he shoves Derivius in the chest and Creed snatches me to his side. He attempts to lift my shirt, but I slap his hands away.
“Riven, calm down and let him explain.”
“Stay out of this, little burden. The two of them have been fucking with us our entire lives and I’ve had it.”
“Can you at least let him tell us what the hell Kira—” Creed covers my mouth. I have half a mind to bite him, but his words stop me.
“Don’t say his name now that he’s left the Godsdawn and we’re in our home. Lift your shirt and let me see your bruises.”
The air racing out of my nose whistles across his hand and my throat closes as everyone turns toward me. As he removes his palm from my mouth, Riven withdraws his fingers from the collar of Derivius’s shirt.
His full, frightening attention descends on me as Kyzen and Amick scoot closer to get a better view.
My lips press together. The adrenaline and anticipation swarming the temple had distracted me from the subtle throbbing in my stomach and arms.
Now that Creed’s demanded to look at the damage done, I feel it a hundred times more keenly.
My fingers tremble as I grip the hem of my shirt.
They make no noise whatsoever as I pull it up until it’s tucked under my bra. Their bodies fall unnaturally still as their eyes land on my stomach, and I tilt my chin down.
Impressions that I know circle all the way around me, line my torso down to my hips. Unlike any other bruise I’ve ever seen in my life, these look as though someone powdered crushed charcoal on my body.
I even run my thumb down my stomach to see if the coloring will wipe off.
It doesn’t.
My chest flutters as a finger strokes the tender skin on my back and a shuddering breath slips out of me.
I don’t even want to imagine what my back looks like.
“They’re like any other bruise. The appearance is different because of his power,” Creed says low as his touch lingers.
I nod as I pull my shirt back down. That seems to bring them all back to reality. “I—we need these answers, Derivius.”
Riven’s eyes swirl as they snap to mine. His lips curl into a vicious snarl as he shoves Derivius away. I attempt to soften my face for him, but I don’t really have any soft feelings at the moment.
“I can already see it on your face that you’re going to say you can’t tell us everything. So skip that taurnshit and get to explaining what’s bubbling inside of me and what it is he wants us to do.”
Derivius sighs defeatedly as he runs his hand down his face.
“This will skirt the line of telling you more than you’re allowed to know, so you’ll need to piece it together,” he says, pointedly looking at Amick.
“As you all know, on the Veilings when you enter the Gods Veil, every becoming god will be paired to a domain that will fall directly under a Beginning God or an already established Domain God. That’s the case ninety-nine point nine percent of the time. The Gods Binding does that all on its own when it senses your essences and pairs you with the most appropriate matching god.
“Your essence didn’t match with any god, but with a being that the Valories created using the original Gods Binding themselves without any say-so from any of us. They’re known as the Messenger. They’re a highly kept secret and have never been recognized the same as we Beginning Gods are because they lack the powers we have. Yet, they’re more powerful than us all. In the past, due to our fear, egos, ignorance, and honestly, our animosity, the rare few who passed through the Veil with this pairing, we…”
“Any who had a tie to the mythological being were killed immediately upon exiting the Veil. It was claimed that they weren’t strong enough to hold godly power and that excused their deaths. They were labeled weak and unworthy. It’s been over a century since this has happened.”
Derivius at least has the nerve to look ashamed at Amick’s cold words.
“That’s correct, except for the fact this creation is anything but mythological. They’re very much alive, well, and highly protected. Other than the obvious reason why I came into the Veil with you, I also did it to mask your true pairing. My counterparts don’t involve themselves much with the Veilings anymore. They’ve established their useless systems of pairing Valtrues and releasing power, but they would’ve intervened had they sensed this.”
I close my eyes and huff as my hands clench at my sides. “So I’m most certainly a freak that’s paired to a being none of the Beginning Gods like and you hid that fact so they wouldn’t kill me. I also assume that was the main reason you split my soul. Am I piecing this shit together now?”
“You’re not a freak, and that’s not the main reason I split your soul. I already told you the main reason I did that. Also, not all of us dislike this individual.”
“You mean you don’t dislike this individual.” I rub my temples and blink my eyes to clear my thoughts. It’s pointless.
“Okay, so what does this mean? Do I not have a domain under chaos? Do we even know what my power is? How do I even have power if I don’t have any ties to a Beginning God or Domain God? Does this creation ever have anything to do with the ones paired to them? That’s a stupid question, never mind. You all killed the poor beings before they even had a chance. This is a fucking shit show you’ve thrown me into, Derivius.”
“I know—”
“We each, as in all becoming gods, have a touch of all the Beginning Gods’ powers within us since it was their essence used to make the Gods Binding. A touch of each Domain God that was created beneath them was added along the way. One of their essences will always come through more dominant, declaring our domain, just as it does our Designations. Since you’re not tied to any of them, you’re receiving equal shares of their power. Just as you’re equalized in Designations. Therefore, your power is settling in an unpredictable way. There’s no way to know what kind of ability you may manifest. There’s a passage within the Book of the Gods Binding—”
“You’ve gotten your hands on that?”
Amick stares at Derivius, unblinking. “How else would I know about the becoming gods who were killed for being paired to that creation?”
“Wait, is that the book—”
“No. This book is locked in the High Chancellor’s office,” Amick cuts Kyzen off and my eyebrows shoot up in surprise. He’s obviously broken some rules to get his hands on some restricted material.
“As I was saying, in the Book of the Gods Binding, there’s a passage that states a Beginning God could have claimed the being rather than have them killed. They’d become their direct responsibility as the mysterious power grew. You all chose to kill them instead of giving them an extra piece of your power and to establish dominance because of the fear of the unknown in how strong they’d develop and so you wouldn’t have to take care of them.

“When he wrapped his power around Thayla, he sensed the parts of each of them inside of her rather than a dominant one. He’s planning on claiming her by giving her a piece of his power in two months’ time. If he does that, she’ll have no choice but to go to the Abandon with him so he can take care of her and her growing power of Obliteration.”
The guys all start shouting, but their words are incoherent. My ears echo and pop like I’ve sunk far below the surface of water. Everything becomes cold as I picture living life in the Abandon under his command.
He wants to add me to his collection.
Does he collect goddesses?
I mean, yeah, sort of. He’s built a whole army of gods.
No.
My lip trembles as I trip over my words. “I…we…fuck no. Derivius, what exactly have you done? What do we do now? Did he slip me power just now when he wrapped me up? He definitely did something.”
His eyes narrow as he holds his hand out toward me. The way his brows continue to draw down doesn’t help.
“His essence is still crawling all over you, but I don’t believe so. I can’t tell you any more than I already have. If I cross him again, he’ll retaliate for sure this time. We aren’t ready for that yet. He’s either hoping I do so he can, or he’s hoping you all fail so he can have you. Which will inevitably lead you all back to the Abandon. Amick, continue on the same search you’ve already started. Inform them of what that is. It’s time you all start acting like the Valtrue I know you can be.”
My fists shake at my sides with the restraint it’s taking not to attack his ass. His stupid, remorseful look doesn’t make it any better.
“What I’m looking for, how many are there?”
Derivius sucks his teeth as he holds Amick’s piercing look. “Two.”
“The Goddess of Seduction’s and who else’s?”
Amick’s neck turns a shade darker as Derivius shakes his head. “It’s safe and won’t be found.”
“Someone better get to explaining in normal fucking language before I lose my shit.” We turn toward the deadly tone that hisses from Riven.
“I’ll leave you all now. Please know and believe me, Sabelline’s Binding’s being sensed was news to me as it was to you. I swear to each of you, this wasn’t information or a situation I knew would happen. I’ve been doing everything I can to keep him in the dark about anything that involves you. It may seem like I’m the reason for all misfortune, but usually I’m just the easiest to blame and I’m always the one to show up. I don’t do anything without the five of you at the forefront of my thoughts.”
He spares us each an apologetic look before he starshoots away. Left behind in the place he stood is a rolled parchment that has us standing statue-still as we stare at it.
Amick’s the first to break and retrieve it. We watch him intensely as his eyes roam over it for a brief second. “Irrelevant for now.”
I sigh and my shoulders slump. “Nothing is irrelevant right now, Amick. Please share what it is.”
“The agreement written on our behalf.”
“We’re definitely going to revisit that, brother, but first you need to explain what you’ve been up to.”
My head’s growing light from everything that has to be addressed. It’s only the middle of the day, but I’m about to tell them good night and take my ass to bed until tomorrow.
“I’ve been working on how to get all our power out of the Gods Binding or one of its creations without the help of a Beginning God. I don’t like to make assumptions and promises before I know with one hundred percent certainty that they’re plausible. For the sake of honesty in this situation, I assume, Derivius just confirmed my theory that I can, in fact, do it. We just need to find the Goddess of Seduction’s Binding.”
Well, shit, I’m no longer tired.