Myrtle’s Reviews > Luster > Status Update

I am so unsettled by this book, I can’t wait for it be over so I can return to a world of relative normalcy. Whatever that really means.

It’s so odd

Also after this book, I am reading the most orthodox book, just to reset my brain, like wtf is this

“Maybe my life isn’t as serious as yours. But I’m a person.”

Me when my colleagues ask me what I did on the weekend

“Of all the men I’ve slept with at work, this is the one who cost me the most”

She’s certifiable

“You fucking slut,” he says, and then releases me”

I beg your pardon

“Some men at least have the decency to guide you immediately to all the things that are wrong with them”
Real

This is the first time in the history of the world that someone has opstrung these sentences together:

“And when we fight in private, I want him to maybe accidentally punch me. I want us to have a long, fruitful bird-watching career, and then I want us to find out we have cancer at exactly the same time. Then I remember his wife, the coaster eases downward, and we fall.”

“Eric’s enthusiasm is infectious. After the first two rides, I am enjoying myself, and not just because dying means I won’t have to pay my student loans”

Funny