Alan’s Reviews > Cloud Atlas > Status Update
Alan
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The Ghastly Ordeal of Timothy Cavendish
“We-by whom I mean anyone over sixty-commit two offenses just by existing. One is Lack of Ve-locity. We drive too slowly, walk too slowly, talk too slowly. The world will do business with dictators, perverts, and drug barons of all stripes, but being slowed down it cannot abide. Our second of-fence is being Everyman's memento mori.
— 5 hours, 28 min ago
“We-by whom I mean anyone over sixty-commit two offenses just by existing. One is Lack of Ve-locity. We drive too slowly, walk too slowly, talk too slowly. The world will do business with dictators, perverts, and drug barons of all stripes, but being slowed down it cannot abide. Our second of-fence is being Everyman's memento mori.
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Alan’s Previous Updates
Alan
is on page 273 of 509
I asked why Meronym'd never spoke this yarnin' in the Valleys.
Valleysmen’d not want to hear, she answered, that human hunger birthed the Civ’lize, but human hunger killed it too. I know it from other tribes offland what I stayed with. Times are you say a person's b'liefs ain't true, they think you're sayin their lifes ain't true an' their truth ain't true.
Yay, she was prob'ly right.
— Sep 23, 2026 07:18AM
Valleysmen’d not want to hear, she answered, that human hunger birthed the Civ’lize, but human hunger killed it too. I know it from other tribes offland what I stayed with. Times are you say a person's b'liefs ain't true, they think you're sayin their lifes ain't true an' their truth ain't true.
Yay, she was prob'ly right.
Alan
is on page 170 of 509
The Ghastly Ordeal of Timothy Cavendish
He made a noise like a didgeridoo at the root of his throat, “That don't grow in Marlboro Country." My head enlarged itself by magnitude of many hundreds, Alice-style, and became a multi story car park wherein dwelt a thousand and one operatic Citroëns. “My word, you can say that again," mouthed the Man Formerly known as Timothy Cavendish.
The next thing I remember…
— Sep 12, 2026 07:06AM
He made a noise like a didgeridoo at the root of his throat, “That don't grow in Marlboro Country." My head enlarged itself by magnitude of many hundreds, Alice-style, and became a multi story car park wherein dwelt a thousand and one operatic Citroëns. “My word, you can say that again," mouthed the Man Formerly known as Timothy Cavendish.
The next thing I remember…
Alan
is on page 75 of 509
Letters from Zedelghem
People knelt in prayer, some moving their lips. Envy'em, really do. I envy God, too, privy to their secrets. Faith, the least exclusive club on Earth, has the craftiest doorman. Every time I've stepped through its wide-open doorway, I find myself stepping out on the street again. Did my best to think beatific thoughts, but my mind kept running its fingers over Jocasta.
— Sep 05, 2026 07:20AM
People knelt in prayer, some moving their lips. Envy'em, really do. I envy God, too, privy to their secrets. Faith, the least exclusive club on Earth, has the craftiest doorman. Every time I've stepped through its wide-open doorway, I find myself stepping out on the street again. Did my best to think beatific thoughts, but my mind kept running its fingers over Jocasta.