Rachael’s Reviews > Shy: A Memoir > Status Update

"These days people who worry about their flaws can pay a medical expert to tidy them up. If only there was a medical procedure remove the chronic embarrassment that accompanies shyness." There is! It's called a sympathectomy. Surprised with all the author's research she didn't come across it.

"A reluctance to visit anyone unless I had received a clear invitation, had continued to the present day. Most of the time social spontaneity was out of the question. Stupid and self-limiting, but so deeply ingrained I couldn't seem to break out of it."

"Dr Scott was adamant. The shy may represent one of many groups of modern-day folk-devils about whom there is a moral panic.... The dominant message...is that non-shyness is normal and acceptable why shyness is deviant and undesirable, carrying with it the risk of social exclusion."

"At the same time, shy people report feeling as if everyone else seems to know the unspoken rules of interaction and thus are able to provide a more poised, socially competent performance. This feeling of relative incompetence is central to the experience of shyness."

"In Shyness and Society: The Illusion of Competence Dr Scott wrote: The shy person is extremely concerned about the risk of making a faux pas and exposing what they see as secret flaws in their characters, most notably their perceived lack of social skills."

"She asks you i you're married, or have any children, and when the answer is no, she and the others lose interest in you. You're half disappointed and half glad, because even though you could tell them some stories, none of yours could compare with theirs."

"She asks you i you're married, or have any children, and when the answer is no, she and the others lose interest in you. You're half disappointed and half glad, because even though you could tell them some stories, none of yours could compare with theirs."

"Shy people often discount positive evaluation entirely. They are more strongly attracted to negative evaluation information. When socially anxious people get positive comments from another person it often increases their anxiety at the next interaction... - 'that person thinks I'm competent by I'm not, so I'm really in trouble!'"

"Hundreds of kilometres of city pavements, station platforms, gallery corridors, cobbled town squares, circular stairwells, stony beaches, damp heaths had passed under my feet. but the lump in my throat, that was a different thing....Some days it would shrink - days when I found brief companionship in hostel dining rooms...When we parted and my voice once again fell silent, the lump expanded".