s’s Reviews > FBI Thrillers #1-5: The Cove / The Maze / The Target / The Edge / Riptide > Status Update
s
is starting
I made up the following, but as far as I’m concerned, this is representative of the writing:
“I’m hungry, Sally.”
“Here’s some toast, James.”
“Why, that’s mighty kind of you, Sally.”
Sally held the plate out across the table. “You know, James, it’s pretty nice outside today.”
James didn’t have to look outside to know she was right. “It sure is, Sally.”
Ugh.
— Oct 21, 2018 08:31PM
“I’m hungry, Sally.”
“Here’s some toast, James.”
“Why, that’s mighty kind of you, Sally.”
Sally held the plate out across the table. “You know, James, it’s pretty nice outside today.”
James didn’t have to look outside to know she was right. “It sure is, Sally.”
Ugh.
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s’s Previous Updates
s
is starting
Why the hell does every person say the name of the person they’re talking to (the only other person in the scene) in EVERY SINGLE piece of dialogue?? Paired with the double-spacing, it makes want to strangle someone.
— Oct 21, 2018 08:31PM
s
is 28% done
Also, there's double-spacing between every paragraph which is really annoying -- I hadn't realized that I mentally prepare for a perspective shift when there's an extra line break in what I'm reading. So all the dialog seems incredibly stilted to me.
— Oct 21, 2018 02:34PM
s
is 28% done
So far, the first book in this collection is horrible. I'm on chapter 8. We'll see if it gets better. I can't tell whether it's the Kindle formatting, which is bizarre -- every chapter starts with the first paragraph in approx 6pt font with the rest of the paragraphs in a normal size.
— Oct 21, 2018 02:32PM
