Logann’s Reviews > Welcome to Night Vale > Status Update

"And now a word from our sponsors.

Having trouble sleeping? Are you awake at all hours? Do birds live in you? Are you crawling with insects? Is your skin jagged and hard? Are you covered in leaves and gently shaking in the breeze? You sound like a tree.

Please, tree, I beg of you to spare me. Please, tree. Spare me.

This message has been brought to you by Old Navy. Old Navy: What's Going to Happen to My Family?"

"He shrugged, turning back to the stairs and leaving her to the business of opening the door, which was tricky. It was one of those ones that required some mild bleeding. 'Ugh,' she said as she entered the office. 'There I am like an idiot thinking Push. No, Pull. And I forgot entirely to just Bleed.'"

"Last night, at a press conference, the City Council reminded everyone that the Dog Park is there for our community enjoyment and use, and so it is important that no one enter, look at, or think about the Dog Park."

"The City Council ended the conference by devouring a raw potato in quick, small bites of their sharp teeth and rough tongues."

I was born to enter this world.

I have perhaps never been so excited to step into a new literary world.