Michelle Hendricks’s Reviews > The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo > Status Update

I don’t think I would have ended my marriage, stood up to Frankie, had the chance to write a surefire bestseller, or would understand the true depths of my father’s devotion to me without Evelyn Hugo. So I think Evelyn is wrong about at least one thing. My hate is not uncomplicated.

You didn’t come here and tell me how much you miss me. Or how hard it has been to live without me. You said you don’t want to give up. And look, I don’t want to give up either. I don’t want to fail at this. But that’s not actually a great reason to stay together. We should have reasons why we don’t want to give up. And I don’t have any.

I have been reeling because I failed. Because I picked the wrong guy for me. I have yet to love someone enough to sacrifice for them. I’ve yet to open my heart enough to let someone in that much. Some marriages aren’t really that great. Sometimes you separate because you weren’t that good together to begin with. Sometimes divorce isn’t an earth shattering loss. Sometimes it’s just two people waking up out of a fog.

Guilt is a feeling I’ve never made much peace with. I find that when it rears its head, it brings an army. When I feel guilty for one thing, I start to see all the other things I should feel guilty for.

It’s always been fascinating to me how things could be simultaneously true and false, how people can be good and bad all in one, how someone can love you in a way that is beautifully selfless while serving themselves ruthlessly.

You do not know how fast you have been running, how hard you have been working, how truly exhausted you are, until someone stands behind you and says, “It’s OK, you can fall down now. I’ll catch you.”

It’s a hard business, reconciling what the truth used to be with what the truth is now. Luckily, I didn’t have to do it for very long.

Evelyn: Heartbreak is loss. Divorce is a piece of paper. If you are heartbroken right now, then I feel for you deeply. But I wasn’t heartbroken when Don left me. I simply felt like my marriage had failed. And those are very different things.
Monique: I wonder why I needed Evelyn to tell me that. I wonder why that sort of distinction has never crossed my mind before