Vim’s Reviews > Hook & Crown > Status Update
Vim
is 9% done
"Then I slowly make my way up the stairs, still constantly spraying. When I reach the top, I go right back down for the rest of my supplies."
So Peter is a creep now. Edward Cullen who?
— Feb 25, 2021 06:03AM
So Peter is a creep now. Edward Cullen who?
Like flag
Vim’s Previous Updates
Vim
is 70% done
One scene. LITERALLY ONE. In different POVs.
Elena's (Aiden) Goodbye Elena
Aiden's (Himself) Goodbye Elena
Will's (Aiden) Goodbye darling
WHAT THE HEEEECK
— Feb 26, 2021 12:12AM
Elena's (Aiden) Goodbye Elena
Aiden's (Himself) Goodbye Elena
Will's (Aiden) Goodbye darling
WHAT THE HEEEECK
Vim
is 69% done
POV change = same as other POV, different pronouns
THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS! There is no added value here. Like, zero. Just imagine Stephenie Meyer writing Midnight Sun within Twilight.
I have not read Midnight Sun, I'm sorry Meyer if I'm damaging your name by making this comparison.
— Feb 26, 2021 12:09AM
THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS! There is no added value here. Like, zero. Just imagine Stephenie Meyer writing Midnight Sun within Twilight.
I have not read Midnight Sun, I'm sorry Meyer if I'm damaging your name by making this comparison.
Vim
is 57% done
Author has a bad habit of describing everything Elena does. She's focusing on the wrong thing. The setting must be described, the crew, the motivation, BY GOD, THE PLOT! Instead she goes on about what color of shirt Elena chooses, what she uses for her hair since she doesn't have a comb...
The girl also gets passed around like a ball as Aiden tells her one story and Will tells her another. The she believes both,
— Feb 25, 2021 11:37PM
The girl also gets passed around like a ball as Aiden tells her one story and Will tells her another. The she believes both,
Vim
is 52% done
In which everyone is aware they are a story and so refers to each other as heroes and villains, where a 17 y/o girl gets kidnapped twice/spirited away/made to come with uniformed, and ends up having sex with a guy old enough to call her a kid.
Oh and the only POC in the tale is a tea now.
Basically, take everything nice about Peter Pan and that's it. But hey, scary mermaids is always a win.
— Feb 25, 2021 10:26PM
Oh and the only POC in the tale is a tea now.
Basically, take everything nice about Peter Pan and that's it. But hey, scary mermaids is always a win.
Vim
is 25% done
So far, we get the most WattPad-ish white boi names ever like Cash and Aiden (which is a super downgrade from Peter Pan), guys looking girls they just met up and down because that's how you show women the respect they deserve (zero), and a totally Not-Like-Other-Girls ™ Girl (only because unlike other girls, she is stupid enough to come with a guy he barely knows to a made-up place).
— Feb 25, 2021 06:57AM
Vim
is 13% done
"I shower quickly, change into a pair of black leggings, a tank top, and my favorite cardigan, wrap myself in my favorite chunky knit blanket, and lay down on the bed."
Aside from redundancy, author feels the need to list every step she takes, every move she makes, every claim she stakes (creepy Peter's watching yoooou)
— Feb 25, 2021 06:05AM
Aside from redundancy, author feels the need to list every step she takes, every move she makes, every claim she stakes (creepy Peter's watching yoooou)
