Deborah Markus > Status Update
Deborah Markus
is on page 15 of 383
Agnes was punished by being taken to a brothel in the nude. God, however, caused her hair to grow so long that it covered her entire body.
Later, a man dropped dead when he tried to rape her. To prove that he was killed by her guardian angel, she prayed for him to come back to life. He did.
Agnes is the patron saint of gardeners, because "virginity is symbolized by an enclosed garden." (Gross.)
— Jan 11, 2015 01:45PM
Later, a man dropped dead when he tried to rape her. To prove that he was killed by her guardian angel, she prayed for him to come back to life. He did.
Agnes is the patron saint of gardeners, because "virginity is symbolized by an enclosed garden." (Gross.)
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Deborah Markus
is on page 26 of 383
Sock-makers have their own patron saint.
That makes me strangely happy.
— Jan 17, 2015 10:46AM
That makes me strangely happy.
Deborah Markus
is on page 24 of 383
Saint Andrew. A fisherman called by Jesus to throw away that rod and reel (or whatever they used back then) and come be a fisher of men, instead.
So now -- and I'm not making this up -- he's prayed to by women who are trying to find husbands.
That just seems wrong. And kind of depressing. "Hey, Andrew -- could you throw a few fish my way?"
I haz a sad now.
— Jan 17, 2015 10:44AM
So now -- and I'm not making this up -- he's prayed to by women who are trying to find husbands.
That just seems wrong. And kind of depressing. "Hey, Andrew -- could you throw a few fish my way?"
I haz a sad now.
Deborah Markus
is on page 21 of 383
Saint Ambrose. Lawyer, governor, bishop. Pivotal in confirming that the official church stance would be Trinitarian (father-son-holy spirit all in one).
So of course he is the patron saint of...?
Bees. And beekeepers. And those who work with wax.
Because he was a sweet-talker. Srsly. He was persuasive when everybody was feeling fighty-stabby, so now he's the patron saint of bees.
Okay, then!
— Jan 17, 2015 10:38AM
So of course he is the patron saint of...?
Bees. And beekeepers. And those who work with wax.
Because he was a sweet-talker. Srsly. He was persuasive when everybody was feeling fighty-stabby, so now he's the patron saint of bees.
Okay, then!
Deborah Markus
is on page 20 of 383
I am bad and wrong and bad.
Here's a bit about Saint Aloysius (earthly life, 1568-1591):
He was intended for a military career; at first his father sent him to Florence, then to Madrid as a page for his education. However, Aloysius, who, at age ten, had made a vow of chastity --
HOW??? How does that even count??? What does a ten-year-old know from chastity, fer crying out corn?
Sorry. I'm bad.
— Jan 17, 2015 10:24AM
Here's a bit about Saint Aloysius (earthly life, 1568-1591):
He was intended for a military career; at first his father sent him to Florence, then to Madrid as a page for his education. However, Aloysius, who, at age ten, had made a vow of chastity --
HOW??? How does that even count??? What does a ten-year-old know from chastity, fer crying out corn?
Sorry. I'm bad.
Deborah Markus
is on page 12 of 383
I have to admit I'm having a hard time keeping a straight face as I do this research.
For instance:
Saint Agatha is the patron saint of casters of bells.
Why? Did she make bells? Did the church bells ring when she was born? Did she write "Jingle Bells"?
No.
Her martyrdom involved having her breasts severed, and bells are shaped like breasts.
Huh.
Well, now I have a new nickname for "the girls."
— Jan 11, 2015 01:27PM
For instance:
Saint Agatha is the patron saint of casters of bells.
Why? Did she make bells? Did the church bells ring when she was born? Did she write "Jingle Bells"?
No.
Her martyrdom involved having her breasts severed, and bells are shaped like breasts.
Huh.
Well, now I have a new nickname for "the girls."
