Fallon Shay’s Reviews > Warning: Psychiatry Can Be Hazardous to Your Mental Health: How Ritalin, Prozac, and Zoloft Replaced Safer Psychotherapy > Status Update

“But relatively few marriages fail because of incompatibility. Almost all of them fail because of external control and the deadly habits.”

“For example, if neither the husband nor the wife is very controlling and you still don’t get along well enough so that you are faithful to each other, I think you are incompatible and should consider divorce.”

“The other reason we choose to depress or use other symptoms is to help us avoid doing something that we believe will cause us more pain than we are already feeling.”

“Specifically, depressing, if we are willing to put up with the misery, is a very effective way to control the people around us, but usually for only a while. If it goes into many months or years, we have to increase the depressing to get the attention we want.”

The choice theory alternatives to the seven deadly habits are supporting, encouraging, listening, accepting, trusting, respecting, and negotiating differences.

The seven deadly habits of external control: criticizing, blaming, complaining, nagging, threatening, punishing, and rewarding.

“There is no happiness in an eye for an eye or a tooth for a tooth.”

“Good choices are those that bring us closer to the people we want to be close to. Bad choices tend to separate us from those people.”

“Mentally healthy people don’t accept that suffering is an unavoidable part of life. They see their suffering as a warning that right now I’m very unsatisfied with one or more of the important relationships in my life.”

“You’ve been unhappy for a long time, and you told me you’re depressed a lot. Now I’d like to teach you how to recognize that when you’re depressed, you’re choosing that, too.”