Leyykokaa’s Reviews > Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life > Status Update

Things can hurt and not harm us.
In fact they can even be good for us. And things that feel good can be
very harmful to us.
You need to evaluate the effects of setting boundaries and be
responsible to the other person, but that does not mean you
should avoid setting boundaries because someone responds with
hurt or anger.

Why is avoidance a boundary problem? at the heart of the struggle is a confusion of boundaries as walls. Boundaries are supposed to be able to "breathe", to be like fences with a gate that can let the good in and the bad out. Individuals with walls for boundaries can let in neither good or bad. No one touches them.

"When parents teach children that setting boundaries or saying no is bad, they are teaching them that others can do with them as they wish. They are sending their children defenseless into a world that contains much evil.
Evil in the form of controlling, manipulative and exploitative people. Evil in the form of temptations."