kath’s Reviews > The Book of Disquiet > Status Update

"God created me to be a child and left me to be a child for ever. But why did he let life beat me and take away my toys and leave me alone at playtime, to crumple up in feeble hands the blue pinafore streaked with tears? Since I cannot live without affection, why was that affection taken from me?"

I recognize in myself the capacity to arouse respect but not affection. Unfortunately, I’ve done nothing that in itself justifies that initial respect and so no one has ever managed fully to respect me either. I sometimes think that I enjoy suffering. But the truth is I would prefer
something else.

If one day I were to love someone, I would not be loved in return.

i read a passage of this book the same way forty from you buys taco bell before he relapses

For light, fleeting moments I manage to forget the taste of life, to let go of the idea of light and noise and die, feelings first, consciously, absurdly, like an empire of anguished ruins, a grand entrance amidst flags and victorious drums into a vast final city where I will weep for nothing, want nothing and not even ask to be myself.

please say sike the lady's computer froze on her im actually about to be stuck at the dmv what the fuck guys stop playing with me

"Not one feeling could make me raise my head from the pillow in which I bury it because I can’t cope with my body nor with the idea that I’m alive, nor even with the absolute idea of life itself."

"For an unknown number of many months you have seen me looking at you, looking at you constantly, always in the same hesitant, solicitous way. I know you have noticed. And since you have, you must have found it odd that my gaze, which is not exactly timid, never carries any meaning. Always attentive, vague and the same, as if contented to be merely the sadness of that meaninglessness."