Wyrdness’s Reviews > Enchanted > Status Update

I also just realised that this is a novel that claims to be only 182 pages long yet it has 19 CHAPTERS. That's just excessive. What could you possibly need 19 chapters for? (it took 5 just to get to the main plot). In my experience run-away chapter counts are a sign that the novel is YA/ NA, badly written, or both. I'm leaning to both here. Copy editors are your friends, please hire them. No, really.

There's so much useless repetition in this about inconsequential stuff, like the magical ever-falling never-gathering cherry blossom in a place the character is about to leave and not come back to for the rest of the novel. Also Arielle having a "just 'cause" aversion to humans and technology in general comes across as petty and stupid. Reads like YA fiction and is really irritating me so far, may have to DNF.

Also it's good to differentiate opponents in a fight, but don't give them cutesy nicknames and then use them over and over again in a single paragraph. I KNOW who you're facing off against and will presume it's them unless told otherwise, I don't need "CHAIN did this, then CHAIN did that, before CHAIN did this other thing".

Not sure how much I'll be able to read this. I already think the Crown Prince is a moron and I don't understand why the King of the Elition WANT an alliance with a people who treat them as cannon fodder and who could make the C17th French Aristocracy look level-headed and frugal. You have a single aide that could pretty much take out the entire room of nobility single-handedly, doooo itttt!