Dawn Keable's Blog

February 5, 2017

Win the Perfect Valentine's Day (Reading) Date

Hey, beautiful you.

I wanna be your Valentine.

Yup. Be mine and all that.

This February 14th, aka, the most isolating of Hallmark holidays for the single chick, we're gonna do things a little differently. This year, you'll be armed with heartfelt sisterhood backup, moi, ready to shatter the myth that you need a prince in your life, Charming or otherwise, in order to be complete in this world. And maybe, just maybe, in the end all you need is one.

So, rise up my single ladies. We're celebrating the individual awesomeness you bring every day.

All. By. Yourself.

My question: You do believe this too, right?

Insert praying hands emoji.

Phew. Listen. I understand. Life is a battlefield. And no matter how strong you are, everyone needs a reminder every once in a while. So I've got you: Signed, sealed, delivered.

Behold the swag-a-licious #DontSettle prize pack.

One lucky winner will celebrate the solo with a signed copy of my book Settling Down, a humorous fictional guidebook, if you will, in the spirit of Jennifer Weiner, that explores what happens to an otherwise strong intelligent woman when she looks outside herself for love and happiness. What did Providence Monthly Magazine have to say? This: "The reasons to like this book are numerous...It's funny, for one. Really funny. And a lot smarter than a lot of other "chick lit" books that all get grouped together in an unfairly negative way."

But that's not all. You'll also receive a #Don'tSettle luggage tag and beach bag, for your own personal journey. Plus, I'm even going to help you put your own ring on it, 'cause it is kinda integral to the storyline. How does.sterling silver, size 7, grab ya? And last, but not least, I'm including a heart filled with yummy chocolates, because, well, duh.

The best part? You don't have to share.

Yeah, I know. I'm the best.

And guess what? You are too.

(Contest open to US mailing addresses only. Ends February 12, 2017. Enter: http://www.writeongrrrl.com/blog/2017...)
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December 30, 2016

May My Inspiration For Writing Settling Down Inspire Your (Single) New Year's Resolutions















"I'm always with him, because:  That. Is. What He Is. There. For."

As with all revolutions, this one started with a proverbial shot. Only this one emanated from a childhood friend's mouth. Someone that I had literally grown up with. 

Or so I thought.

Truth is, what started as a convo about friendship (ours), free time (the majority of it spent with her boyfriend) and working on the balance of the two, her angry words said way more.

About herself. What she wanted in life. And more importantly, what she was willing to sacrifice to get there. Unfortunately, this wasn't a place that I could comfortably stand anymore.

Indeed. I believe in love. Passionately.

I believe in romance. Of relationships. Of marriages, partnering up, of finding someone who will help you grow into your best self. In fact, the growth that I've experienced being married to my husband is something that I know I would have never experienced on my own.

I am IN love. Someone asked me that, quite randomly (and kinda frantically) at a nightclub a few years back. The answer is yes. Twenty-four years and counting (17 of them married), and I can honestly say that I did a surprisingly good job picking my mate.

It's what my husband 'is there for', that's a little different. His job is to challenge me to evolve into a better person, something he accomplishes on the daily -- instead of being a physical symbol that I am lovable. And there's a huge difference there. Because in order to get to this healthy place at all, I had to learn how to love myself first, instead of aimlessly looking for someone to complete me.

'Cause that never works.

The thing about settling, especially if you don't know yourself, is it won't even register at first. It's the long game where you'll miss out. Because, instead of waiting for Mr. Amaze-balls, someone who will help make you a better person, settlers desperately choose the wrong partner, simply because they don't want to be alone.

You don't want this life.

So how about you make it your New Year's resolution. To rejoice in being single. To embrace the fact that you're really okay being alone. Instead of being alone until the next guy shows up. Because, there's a difference.

If you need some help, a fictional guidebook if you will, I wrote Settling Down as my gift to you.

And while it was initially inspired by real life events, I was intent on writing a better ending.

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Published on December 30, 2016 13:14

September 8, 2016

Back to Life

"When the place that you were born is not where you belong.

Tell me baby, what stops you from wearing a crown"

This is how my birthday kicked off this year.

In NYC. At 4am. In the sidewalk shadows before sunrise.

With these soulful lyrics by Ms. Alicia Keys that almost made me cry.

Because (vulnerable moment alert):  This. Is Me.

The place where I was born, is not where I belong. 

(And trust. No one mentioned anything 'bout any crown.)

So, how do become your own queen? The empress of your own kingdom? Especially when there's roadblocks at every turn? Easy (in concept):  Learn to love your damn self. Fiercely. Passionately. Above anything else. In spite of everything else. With wild reckless abandon.

And while it's a simple concept, the journey to get there isn't.

That path is incredibly hard. And so rocky most don't even try to scale it. Often times it's littered with the broken dreams of others and their truths (read: falses) for themselves, and you.

But you can, and need to claw your way beyond the negative voices. The ones that put down your choices. The ones that say that you're not good enough. The ones that say that you don't matter.

Because, dammit, dear girl. You do!

You deserve to wear that crown, polished to a blinding brilliance, with your head held high. You deserve to stride away from any negativity that binds you to the past. From the hurtful lies that kept you from growing. And achieving. And owning the fearless one of a kind Y-O-U.

You deserve to shine. Brighter than any damn diamond.

Years after embarking on this journey, here I was, in the darkness right before the dawn. On the Today Show Plaza:  Whole. Healed. Happy. Proud as hell of who I am now, and what I've already accomplished. But more importantly, who I have the potential of becoming. 'Cause that chick? She got mad untapped potential.

And then, that song, ironically called 'Back To Life'. A truly beautiful birthday blessing.

A reminder that not only am I wearing that sparkly crown that I designed myself.

I'm working it like a boss.

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Published on September 08, 2016 09:56

April 18, 2016

Why I Stopped Checking My Book Numbers Every Ten Minutes, er, Seconds

My deepest author confession? I haven't checked my book sales numbers in ten days.

Or explained in a way everyone can understand: I haven't checked Facebook for likes.

Since a week ago Tuesday.

Ah, now I got your attention.

Hey, listen, as a fellow member of Social Media Beast Nation. I understand the compulsion of checking. And checking. And checking. 'Cause it feels good to ride high on that virtual wave of likes. And follows.

And book sales.

Only problem? We always want more.

So instead of patting ourselves on the back and saying, fantastic job! Or damn girl, good for you patiently building this up slow and steady like, our brains are on the hunt for additional instant gratification. And when that doesn't come soon enough, like twelve seconds ago, we start focusing on all the things we don't have: Like why nobody liked that photo. Or why only ten retweets. Or why hasn't anyone bought my book.

In the last 8 hours?

I know you feel me.

And I'm not even saying that the numbers aren't valuable. Clearly, they work as a hard indicator of sales. They show you've got a good product on your hands, and indirectly, because people continue to purchase said product, that you're a relatively good writer. All true. But don't you think you should know this already anyway, especially if you've gotten this far in the process?

Trust. I'm not anti-sales. Indeed, I'd love to sell so many books I could purchase the New York Times Best Seller List. But if I haven't sold a bazillion books in the last ten minutes, will that alter my original marketing plan? Will I stop working any harder to get there? Does it mean that I'm lazy? Someone who hasn't accomplished anything?

Like, ever in life?

Hell no. So why even give yourself the opportunity to go there?

Honestly, I didn't become a writer for the money. I became one because it made me happy. Because I can't imagine doing anything else. Because I want to affect change with my words. To encourage people. To make them think. To make them understand that they are not alone.

And truth is, I'm already doing that.

You're here right now, aren't you?

So kiss off metrics. From here on out, we're gonna be monthly friends. Henceforth (best writer word ever), I'm committed to measuring my worth, in the kind of life that I lead every day. How I treat people. And the amount of books sold between 10am and 3pm on a Wednesday don't fit anywhere in that equation.
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March 3, 2016

Trust Your Path. And hey, #DontSettle

I had a literary agent once.

Yup. Somewhere around 2007ish. I think our relationship lasted for 'bout a day.

I've blocked out most of the details, as I have a tendency to do with all stories that come with intense spirit killing potential. I do remember she told me 'I made her day' when I accepted her offer. And then, for some reason, that had nothing to do with even a hint of a Playboy scandal, she rescinded her request. (Um, how often does that happen?)

Plain and simple: I just don't think I was on the right path.

First off, my book, literally the first fiction piece that I'd written in my life well, sucked. I wrote it after reading some truly awful chick lit, back in the day when the publishing world was trying to capitalize (quickly) on the success of Bridget Jones' Diary. I remember saying, I can do this.

And so I did.

A couple years prior, my initial manuscript would have been enough to get onto a shelf near you. But I am awfully grateful that I was a bit late for that party. My first effort was not my best effort. And my fiction career could have, and should have, tanked before it even got started.

Truth be told, my book did not completely suck. But it did suck precisely enough to garner enough attention not to succeed. (How's that for an Oprah-ism?) And for that I am grateful.

Settling Down received, even in its first incarnation, an impressive amount of interest. There were no blanket statements about my skills as a writer, in fact, so many of my rejections were incredibly complimentary. Gradually, I realized that this was not about talent. And I would do myself a supreme disservice by writing myself off as a publishing failure. Instead, I began to embrace the editorial weaknesses of my manuscript as the chance to grow as a writer.

Because isn't that what life is all about?

My next challenge? Self-publishing. Trust, it wasn't completely my idea. I live with someone who pushed me hard in this direction. (As well as offering up his mad photography skills to come up with a killer cover.) Add in the relatively recent advent of Amazon on demand publishing, total editorial and marketing control and a bigger cut of the paycheck for moi, and it seems like a no-brainer.

I'm happy to report that so far anyways, this path is cooperating in the most obedient of ways. And in my heart, I believe I'm finally on track, not only because I've edited my book within an inch of its life, but because I can so clearly see how all roads have merged and gotten me to this place of today. (Including knowledge gained in the strangest places. I'm talking to you Ebay keywords.)

My purpose in writing Settling Down is to create a powerful movement for women to not only kick those romantic stereotypes once and for all, but to empower the sisterhood to understand that maybe, just maybe, all you need is one after all.

So, bring yourself, won't you? 'Cause, here, that's all you need.
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