Hazel Thornton's Blog

I keep hearing people complain about “doomscrolling”. It’s depressing and time consuming. But it’s not inevitable! I’m not sure if they get hooked on the gloom and doom in their news feeds, in the same way we sometimes can’t look away from a slow-moving train wreck, or if they just haven’t figured out how to avoid it (short of avoiding social media altogether, that is).

Avoiding it (while still participating in social media) is a function of settings, algorithms, and user behavior. The more you watch and click on gloomy subjects, the more a social media platform will think you like it and want to see more of it. Meanwhile, the less you interact with accounts you DO like — by “liking”, commenting, and sharing — the less you will see of them over time.

So, what is the alternative to doomscrolling? Joyscrolling!

Dang it, I thought I made that up, but I Googled “joyscrolling” only to find that I’m not the only one calling it that.

AI Overview

Joyscrolling is the act of intentionally seeking out and consuming positive, uplifting, or comforting content online to counteract the negative mental health effects of doomscrolling. Instead of obsessively focusing on bad news, a joyscroller curates their online experience to include inspiring images, videos, and stories that bring them joy, solace, or a sense of connection.

So I’m sharing some of my favorite accounts for your viewing pleasure. And I’d love to know some of yours! If you have one to share, or if you decide you like one of mine, please leave a comment below.

YouTube Accounts

I discovered most of these creators on Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok. In recent months, almost all social media platforms have had issues that drive most creators to establish accounts elsewhere as well. They understandably don’t want all their eggs in one basket!

I, too, went through a social media decluttering phase, and updated this blog post accordingly, if you want to know where to find me: Clearing Social Media Clutter

Why YouTube?

Because people complain when I include links to social media platforms. They either never had accounts there, or don’t anymore, and they have it in their heads that they can’t click on the links I provide and view what I am sharing. Sometimes it’s true (depending on how I shared it, or how they are viewing it). And sometimes, when they are asked to join the platform, they don’t notice that they can say no thanks and still view what I am sharing. Or they don’t think they can, so they don’t even try. But YouTube is for everyone. (Although there is a paid level for almost everything these days.)

Plumes

This French musician plays music for animals, usually on farms or in zoos. They love it!

https://www.youtube.com/@Plumesmusic/

Miniature Cusina

Miniature Cusina is the practice of cooking tiny meals using real food and tiny pots and utensils, appealing to both cooking fans and collectors. This is my favorite cooking “show”. I like it partly because the videos are short, there’s no talking, and there are no fancy, long, distracting painted fingernails like I’ve found in almost all other close-up miniature videos (because it features a guy’s hands). Like their logo says: Real food. Real cooking. Real sound.

https://www.youtube.com/@MiniatureCusina/

Island Ock

This Long Island grocery store owner encourages local kids by rewarding good grades, acknowledging, celebrating, and building their confidence.

https://www.youtube.com/@Islandock1/

Fernando Yumul

Miniature Artist from the Philippines. I mean, he makes miniatures. Not that he’s a tiny person. I love seeing him transform everyday objects into entirely new (but familiar) things.

https://www.youtube.com/@Fernandoyumul1970/

Mapic2

German model railroad enthusiast with a cat who is unfazed. (Playlist: Katze vs. Gartenbahn)

https://www.youtube.com/@mapic2/

Seanthesheepman

30-year-old shepherd and stockman working in Scotland with his 3 sheepdogs. Not only are his dogs amazingly talented, I also enjoy his choice of background music in most cases.

https://www.youtube.com/@seanthesheepman5845/

Becorns | David M Bird

He builds little people out of acorns and sticks, then photographs them in the wild with real animals. I like the videos that share his process.

https://www.youtube.com/@davidmbird

Nadya Borisevich art

I find it very relaxing to watch her make botanical gel prints. (She does other things as well.)

https://www.youtube.com/@nadya_draws_in_seattle/

 

WebsitesAnderson Virtual Calming Room

I was looking for live animal cams — there are a gazillion of them these days! — and I found this local New Mexico site for students (and anyone) that not only includes a variety of animal cams, but many other ways to “boost your mood and help you refocus.”

https://www.mgt.unm.edu/calming-room/default.asp

PDX Sidewalk Joy

A community of interactive sidewalk installations and exchanges around Portland, Oregon. These “installations” are all Little-Free-Library-adjacent. If you see something you like, you can make your own, wherever you live! (Or search for existing installations where you live.)

https://www.pdxsidewalkjoy.com/

 

Facebook Groups

Facebook Groups don’t have YouTube counterparts. And these are links to groups, not to individual videos, so yes, you probably do have to have a Facebook account to see much. But they are public groups, so (if you have a Facebook account) you don’t have to join the groups to peruse them. In fact, I have not joined any of them. But I’ve apparently spent enough time looking at their posts for Facebook to think I want to see more of them! I see plenty that way, and know where to find more.

Cookie Cutter Identification (CCID)

Sometimes the mystery cookie cutter is identified; sometimes people make alternate suggestions for its use; other times people just get silly about it.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/cookiecutterid

Dollhouse miniatures made from everyday things

This group is about sharing ideas for making miniatures from scratch or found items. You can show off what you have made (ideally with some explanation) or ask questions about making miniatures.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1675907215955924/

FREE PHOTOSHOP help, edits & requests

There are a number of similar groups. As previously mentioned, I have not actually joined this group. And, in this case, I believe the benefit in NOT joining is that I don’t see their posts in my news feed until they have received a substantial number of replies. The replies range from, “Why do you want to do that?”, to totally awful amateur edits, to impressive expert edits, to hilarious and inappropriate edits. The range of reasons why people want edits is thought-provoking. And I wouldn’t want to see all the new requests and early discussion anyway.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1154264053384266/

 

What’s your favorite source of internet Joyscrolling?

Might you try one of these?

Please share in the comments below!

______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post!  Click here  to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton,  Organized for Life and Beyond

 _____________________________________________________________________________

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I think we’ve probably all heard the terms invisible illnesses and hidden disabilities. Yes? But if you don’t have one yourself, I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t think about it very often. I didn’t either until I was diagnosed with one that affected my mobility. This post is to raise awareness and offer resources.

An invisible illness is any physical, mental, or neurological condition that limits or challenges a person’s life but is not immediately apparent to others.

People with invisible illnesses often appear healthy, even when they are experiencing severe chronic pain, extreme fatigue, cognitive difficulties, or other debilitating symptoms that significantly impact their daily lives.

 

Click here to read “But you don’t look sick!” and to view a larger, clearer image.

Types of invisible illnesses

There are way too many types of invisible illnesses to list them all. A few that affect people I know personally are diabetes, autism, Crohn’s disease, POTS, kidney disease, multiple sclerosis, fibromyalgia, long COVID, and several forms of cancer. Some of these conditions start out invisible and become more apparent as they progress.

Many invisible illnesses affect mobility, but not always to the extent that an extremely visible wheelchair (or other mobility aid) is required. Most involve chronic pain and fatigue.

Multiple conditions

I hate the term comorbidities. It sounds so…well, morbid! And it wasn’t until COVID, when the term was used a lot to identify high-risk individuals, that I realized I have several of them. I’m not going to list all of mine, but when you look at me what do you see? I’m fat, I’m older, and I’m a woman. This is not a recipe for being taken seriously in society or by medical professionals. If you don’t agree with me, you’re probably not a fat, older woman!

OMG, I wasn’t planning to elaborate, but I just saw this video (2:35 min.) and had to include it: Katie Couric interviews Dr. Mary Claire Haver on how being told to look out for “Whiny Women” shaped her career.

When invisible isn’t exactly invisible

Obese people are obviously, visibly, fat. It’s easy to assume they are just lazy and eat too much food. But they can also have multiple other things going on with them that are “invisible”. They can have illnesses (or medications) that contribute to their obesity, and they can have illnesses in addition to being obese.

Fat can be classified in several different ways. For purposes of this post, I have TWO types of visible fat. One type is responsive to diet and exercise, but the other one is not. The fat disease I have — besides obesity — is called lipedema. If you’ve never heard of it, well, neither had I until a year or so ago. If I’d known about it, I could have asked about it by name and shortened the diagnostic period from several years to several weeks (or months, considering how challenging it is to get an appointment around here). I did point out my symptoms to every doctor I saw — heavy legs that were painful to the touch and seemed out of proportion to the rest of my albeit fat body — resulting in a few helpful half-measures, but not quite on the mark when it came to a diagnosis. There is no cure for lipedema, but I always think it’s better to know what’s wrong than to wonder. I’ve learned that there are many things I can do to manage it, and if don’t do all the things, it will get worse over time. And “managing” it doesn’t mean I can do everything I used to do.

Lipedema and lymphedema

Lipedema is not rare, but it affects almost exclusively women and is extremely misunderstood and under-diagnosed. (As are many “women’s” diseases.) Since I don’t see lipedema on most lists of invisible illnesses, I asked Google about it.

AI Overview:

Yes, lipedema can be considered an invisible illness, despite its visible physical symptoms. While lipedema causes a disproportionate buildup of fat that can be seen, the underlying disease and the chronic, debilitating pain and fatigue that accompany it are often not understood or acknowledged by others, including medical professionals.

Many lip-edema patients (including myself) also have lymph-edema to one extent or another, or they are in danger of developing it. Everyone looks and feels different in the various stages and types of lipedema. Charts depicting the stages and types of lipedema also differ from each other, which is why I’m not including one here. If you see one, I’m not the worst case, but neither am I the best case. Some individuals have benefitted from surgery (a non-cosmetic form of liposuction), but it’s not a cure, and they still have to do all the things to manage it afterwards or it will return.

This post is not all about me, though, and is not meant as a lipedema tutorial, either. So allow me to leave you with some resources where you can learn more about it:

Printable PDF: “10 Things to Understand about Lipedema” is a good 4-page infographic of the basics.

Websites: The best sources for lipedema information are organizations like the Lipedema Foundation, The Lipedema Project, and Lipedema.com.

Social Media: Type the word “lipedema” into the search box on any social media platform to find lots of resources, different types of support groups, and individuals posting about it.

This is why you don’t park in the striped area of a handicap zone.

Mobility (or lack thereof) awareness

One of the easiest ways of identifying someone with a disability is if they are in a wheelchair or using another mobility aid such as crutches or a rollator. These would be considered visible illnesses or conditions. As a result of mobility difficulties related to lipedema, I have, in my possession, a doctor-prescribed handicap parking placard. But I am not using mobility aids (except when I twisted my knee and used crutches for a while).

Do I use the placard? Yes, sometimes I do. Not always, though.

Whenever I drive somewhere there is a calculation involved:

Is there a parking lot where I’m going? (Or is it street parking, and how far down the street are we talking about?)Is there an open handicap parking spot available? (Often there aren’t enough.)How far from the front door is it? (Sometimes the spots are quite far from the front door. It’s like someone decided no one needs a handicap spot unless they have a wheelchair, and the wheelchair ramp is sometimes at the end of the building, quite far from the front door.)Are there regular spots available closer (or equally close) to the front door? (In which case I would choose one of those, so as to leave the handicap spot free for someone else.)To what degree am I feeling the need to park close to the front door today? (Some days are better than others.)

I can’t say anyone’s ever given me a hard time for using a handicap parking spot, but I know others who have been given a hard time, and I always worry that someone will.

Spoon Theory

What is it? Here’s the Wikipedia definition:

Spoon theory is a metaphor describing the amount of physical or mental energy that a person has available for daily activities and tasks, and how it can become limited.

A lot of Spoon Theory articles and infographics pertain to neurodivergence. But that just means it applies to them as well as to those with other invisible illnesses. If you click here you are likely to find infographics and articles that pertains to your specific condition.

This isn’t about which diseases are “worse” than others. Even if two people have the same disease, their experience of it can be different in as many ways as they are similar.

I don’t personally use The Spoon Theory, but I think that’s mostly because I don’t have to explain myself very often to others. (“Sorry, I can’t accept your last-minute invitation; I’m down to my last spoon and that would take at least three.”)

 

Organizing always helps

Some invisible illnesses are temporary, and others are chronic. I once wrote a post called Organizing to De-Stress a Major or Chronic Illness. It was intended for both those who are ill, and for those who live with or care for them.

I’ve updated it a few times over the years, the last time being in 2019. Which, ironically, is around the time I was seeking my own diagnosis and not finding answers. So there may be a few outdated resources, but the major sub-topics are still good:

Organize Your Medical RecordsOrganize Your Support SystemOrganize Your HomeOrganize Your SelfHidden Disabilities Sunflower Program

The Hidden Disabilities Sunflower lanyard, cards, and pins are simple tools for voluntarily sharing that you have a disability or condition that may not be immediately apparent. The program also provides ways for public places and services to indicate that they are aware and available to help you.

Although they feature a number of disabilities on this page, the site also has an index of 912 (!!!) hidden disabilities on this page (scroll down past the form). I was just about to submit “lipedema” when I realized they DO have both lipedema and lymphedema listed under their British and Australian spellings — lipoedema and lymphoedema.

I don’t know how well this worldwide program is catching on, partly because I don’t get out much these days. But I do know the Regional Director in Canada, Clare Kumar. (I already knew about the program before she started talking about it.) She has a Facebook group called Happy Space Pod, and a podcast called Happy Space Podcast. Check them out!

Invisible illness awareness

What can you do to help? Well, for starters:

Remember:  Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Share this post with others.For more info, Google “invisible illness awareness”. If you see someone wearing a sunflower lanyard or pin, be patient with them if nothing else. (Surely there are people who will wear sunflowers without ever knowing this program exists, because they are pretty. Eh — might as well be kind to them, too!)Keep in mind that the Hidden Disabilities Sunflower program estimates that 1 in 6 people has an invisible illness. That’s a lot of people!

Do you, or someone you know, have an invisible illness?

If so, do you have any advice for the rest of us?

Please share in the comments below!

______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post!  Click here  to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton,  Organized for Life and Beyond

 _____________________________________________________________________________

 

 

 

The post Not all disabilities are visible appeared first on Hazel Thornton.

Meme credit: @thousand.foot.cliff

Parole denied

Last week Erik and Lyle faced separate parole board panels in record-breaking 10- and 11-hour long hearings, in their bid for freedom after 35+ years behind bars. Both were denied.

While that ruling disappointed all who support them, it wasn’t surprising to anyone who knew that parole is rarely granted on the first try. To those who think the hearings were rigged I say: So what else is new? The Menendez brothers can’t catch a break.

But it’s not over

It’s the beginning of the end, and there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.

How can I be hopeful after so long and so many disappointments? Well, for most of their incarceration, as LWOP (life without parole) prisoners, they had zero hope of ever being paroled. That’s what makes their transformation all the more remarkable. It was a miracle that they were resentenced after all this time and are now eligible for parole.

 

Blog post: Menendez Miracle #6

Come on, Miracle #7!

 

Take it from a close friend of Erik’s and Lyle’s — Anerae Brown, aka rapper X-Raided — who spent 26 years behind bars, and who credits the brothers for helping him succeed on his path to parole:

Why a Three Year Denial is good

(It’s a TikTok. If you don’t have an account, and if it asks you to create one, just say no. You should then be able to watch it with no problem.)

Here it is in chart form (my favorite), from Instagram Menendez supporter @thousand.foot.cliff:

Three paths to freedomParole

They were each given a “three-year denial”. This means on the surface that they are eligible to reapply for parole in three years. (Which is the best case for a denial, when you consider the other options are five, seven, ten and fifteen years.) But in practice, I’m told, they will likely have an administrative review after 12 months and possibly be approved to go back before the parole board in 18 months.

Was the hearing rigged? Attorney Mark Geragos certainly thinks so! Maybe the decision can be appealed, but meanwhile, Lyle and Erik need to be on their best behavior — better than best — if they want a favorable ruling next time.

Habeas Corpus Petition

In July, Judge Ryan ruled that the two pieces of “new” evidence (easily Googled) “would have more likely than not changed the outcome of their second trial.” This is good news, but I hope to God there’s something that can be done here short of an actual third trial.

Here’s a fun fact for those who think the Netflix Monsters series started it all: The habeas petition was filed by the brothers’ lawyers two days after the Menendez + Menudo: Boys Betrayed documentary aired in May 2023.

Clemency

This case has been a political football since the beginning. Governor Newsom can grant them clemency whenever he wants. Despite changes in societal understanding of the psychological effects of sexual abuse, and new laws pertaining to youth offenders, no one wants to be the one to let the Menendez brothers go free.

I think he believes them and wants to help them out, but he doesn’t want to ruin his political career over it. No matter how many thousands of new supporters the brothers have gained in recent years, there are still millions of others who hate them and think they should die in prison. And the new raft of media reports about the hearings are all focused on rule-breaking at the expense of describing their otherwise model citizenry. My prediction is that Newsom will approve the parole board’s decision if and when they eventually grant them parole, but that he won’t grant clemency on his own. I’m also completely open to being pleasantly surprised!

 

They’re not perfect

Lyle and Erik are flawed human beings. Who isn’t? They’re not angels, nor are they monsters. They did a terrible thing, in a spectacularly brutal fashion, and have spent 35-years-and-counting paying for it. They grew up in prison. They became responsible men who not only have improved and educated themselves, but who have also contributed to their prison society by leading and creating new programs so that others could succeed after they were released, even before they themselves had hope of being released someday.

The justice system has failed them time and time again. Prisons are not focused on rehabilitation, they’re focused on punishment. But maybe Lyle and Erik can help change that.

Blog Post: Inspiring Prison Programs

This is a portion of the mural at the RJ Donovan Correctional Facility. It is part of Lyle’s Green Space project, with Erik participating as lead painter.

 

It seems their worst crime in recent years has been forbidden cell phone usage. Does that mean they are a violent risk to society? Absolutely not! Does it mean they think they are above the law? Maybe so.

One of the parole commissioners expressed disapproval of the fact that brothers’ supporters only seem to know about the good things they’ve done in prison. Oh, c’mon! Could it be because most of the infractions were 20-30 years ago, before a lot of their new supporters were even born? Or that they weren’t egregious? The brothers have no direct access to social media and rely on their families to represent them there . (Fun fact: Facebook was introduced in 2004, ten years after the first trial ended.) How were they supposed to let us know every time they broke a rule? And what business is it of ours, anyway? I, for one, am happy with the reports I get of their progress and well-being and don’t need to be privy to their every thought and deed.

Fair or not, if they can avoid infractions for the next 18 months they will likely be able to go before the parole board sooner than three years and have a good chance of being approved next time.

Remorse and responsibility

DA Hochman is fond of saying the brothers have not yet expressed remorse for their crime and have not taken responsibility for it. Uh, where has he been? I have heard them publicly express remorse and take responsibility many times over the past three decades, starting when I sat in the jury box and watched their grueling weeks-long testimony in 1993 from ten feet away. Ask their families if they seem remorseful enough. I think the families should be the judge of that, not DA Hochman. (Don’t get me started on how the families have been treated over this past year.)

Imperfect self-defense

DA Hochman also loves to talk about how this wasn’t self-defense. Spoiler alert: THEY NEVER SAID IT WAS.

In the first trial their legal claim was Imperfect Self-defense.

Imperfect Self-defense is a legal doctrine in which a defendant killed another person while holding an honest but unreasonable belief that deadly force was necessary to prevent death or great bodily injury. It acts as a partial defense to murder, reducing a homicide charge to voluntary manslaughter rather than a complete acquittal. The defense applies when at least one element of a perfect self-defense claim is not met because the defendant’s belief was unreasonable, even if it was genuinely held.

I get why the general public doesn’t know about this, but DA Hochman should know better. Unfortunately his microphone is bigger than mine.

The brothers never said “we were right” that their lives were in imminent danger. They said, “we were afraid” and —  because of the hypervigilance they developed during their abusive childhoods — they thought their lives were in imminent danger. (And the prosecution did not offer a single expert witness to refute it.)

This defense was disallowed, unfairly so, in the second trial. That jury had no choice but to convict them of first-degree murder. Mission accomplished, DA Garcetti and Judge Weisberg! Congratulations. Tell me again why you needed to be right, and not fair? Oh, that’s right, because you were being ridiculed in the press for losing high-profile cases. This chart helps to explain:

CLICK the image to view and print full-sized chart. “FINALLY” is, of course, from the POV of the DA, not from my own POV. Fun fact: Guess who the prosecutor was in the McMartin case? Pam Bozanich.

 

I wish I had thought to create this flow chart in the jury deliberation room, and not 20 years later. I wonder if it would have made a difference?

What’s YOUR verdict? CLICK the image to view, download, and print the full-sized (free) PDF chart. SHARE it with both supporters and doubters. Order your copy of my book here: Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror

 

Too much focus on the past

Yes, they killed their parents, and in a spectacularly brutal manner. For that they have served 35+ years. (People forget, when they say 30 years, that they were arrested in March 1990.)

However, I did think that the focus of a parole hearing was supposed to be more about rehabilitation and whether they’d be a danger to society if released than about re-trying the original crime.

If we’re going to dwell in the past, though, let us not forget:

Two juries saw ALL of the evidence in the first trial. They were BOTH hung, with half of EACH jury voting for manslaughter, not murder. It was not mandatory that they be retried at all.The second trial jury saw only a portion of the evidence, with much of it being presented out of context. It was a travesty of justice, as I’ve described in the 2018 revised edition of my book Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror .In their 2005 appeal, 9th Circuit Court Justice Alex Kozinski said he believed there had been “collusion between the DA’s office and Judge Stanley Weisberg” to manipulate the second trial to guarantee a first-degree murder resolution, not manslaughter as it should have been. In spite of his remarks, Justice Kozinski voted against the appeal and upheld the verdict. (Source: Justice Kozinski on Erik Tells All.)

 

I still believe in miracles

I created this chart in 2017 and have been predicting and keeping track of the miracles ever since.

–> CLICK IMAGE TO VIEW & PRINT FULL-SIZED CHART

 

Everyone’s an expert these days

It used to be that only a handful of people were willing to speak up on behalf of the Menendez brothers in news interviews, articles, documentaries, and podcasts. Now the “room” (including all social media platforms, none of which existed in the early ‘90s) is so crowded that my introverted little voice is all but drowned out.

I used to wonder what could happen to make me change my mind about the case and the brothers. But if cell phones are the worst the parole board can dredge up in recent years, I’m still on board.

You will be, and already have been, hearing less from me, though, because (among other reasons) I’m 30 years older too. Social media platforms keep changing, and it’s hard to keep up.

I’ll be honest — I was hoping parole would be granted because I’m looking forward to this all being over for ME. I see any amount of vindication for the Menendez brothers as vindication for me, too, as a female juror who voted for manslaughter, not murder, and who has been mocked for it, by the uneducated and unsympathetic, ever since. Likewise, their supporters are my supporters. Including you, probably, if you’ve read this far. And for that I sincerely thank you!

Meanwhile, the story’s not over.

The question was always why?

 

Resources Hazel’s Top Menendez Media Picks Books, Documentaries, Dramatizations, Podcasts, Websites The Menendez Murders Flow Chart  What’s YOUR verdict? Enough is Enough: The Menendez Tapestry 4-min video Complete First Trial Courtroom Videos Watch for yourself on CourtTV.com.(The corrupt second trial was not televised.) Menendez Juror Website  More resources, News, FAQ, etc.______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post!  Click here  to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton,  Organized for Life and Beyond

 _____________________________________________________________________________

The post It’s not over for the Menendez brothers! appeared first on Hazel Thornton.

If you’ve followed me for a while, you’ll be used to me talking about death from time to time.

Planning my virtual funeral – who’s with me?Talking about death won’t kill you, LOL!“We Remember” our loved onesIs Swedish Death Cleaning for you?‘Death Cleaning’ isn’t as scary as it sounds! (4 short book reviews)Who will take care of us when we’re old?Are your keepsakes a legacy, or a liability?Legacy Resource RoundupOrganizing for Your LegacyAren’t You Dying to Know?Do You Have a Virtual Will?

Several of these posts, as well as my book — What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Own Family Legacy — advocate writing one’s own obituary, but I’ve never gone into much detail before.

In “We Remember” our loved ones, I mentioned that my dad had written his own obituary in the form of a farewell letter. (His actual death was a surprise, but he was a planner, like me.)

I even attended a little class once, from French Mortuary here in Albuquerque. It was PP (Pre-Pandemic) so I don’t remember a lot of it. I’ve got notes, and I know where they are, but I’ll admit I never finished mine.

 

Think of it as a first draft

I just read what I had written so far (in my French Mortuary notes) and it was pretty cringy. The fact is that we are NOT dead yet. As our lives continue, and our writing styles change, so our obituaries need to be reviewed from time to time, just like our wills.

My advice for dealing with the uncertainty and incompleteness of it all is this: Think of it as a first draft. If all you manage is some notes about your life, that’s better than nothing, and a good place to start.

RELATED BLOG POST: On Writing a First Draft

This mug was a freebie at the (also free) write-your-own-obit class.

Remember, you will be dead

For this to be a worthwhile effort, you will need to make sure someone knows you’ve written your own obituary (or jotted down some notes to help them out). They also need to know where to find it. Even if they end up using what you’ve written differently than you envisioned, it will be very helpful.

Why would they not use it just as you’ve written it? Here are a few reasons:

You can make it as long as you want for some memorial sites such as Ancestry’s We Remember.But you might want a shorter version for the local newspaper because those obituaries aren’t cheap!If you wrote it in first person, there might be a need for a third person version.You might also want shorter versions for other sites and social media platforms.

BONUS TIP #1: Do your loved ones a favor and write short goodbye messages for different uses (personal, business). Let them know exactly which social media platforms and groups are important to you and how to access and contact them.

BONUS TIP #2: Include a photo you like with your obituary. You can always upgrade it later. But lord knows what someone else will pick on their own!

 

It’s not easy

I never said it was easy, but it doesn’t have to be hard, either! Here are Three tips for stress-free obituary writing, from French Funerals & Cremation. They’re talking in this post about writing an obituary for a loved one, but the tips also apply to writing one for yourself. Spoiler alert, the whole post is worth reading, but here are the high-level tips:

Don’t overthink itPut your feelings into wordsGet outside help

 

Why should we bother?It’s the least we can do for our loved ones who will be grieving for us. I’ve heard a will referred to as “a love letter to your family”. And I think an obituary falls into that same category, don’t you?Who knows us better than we know ourselves? Who would write yours if not you? Do they actually know your history and what you would (and wouldn’t) like to be included?Maybe you don’t care what someone else would write about you. But is there a message you’d like to leave behind? Or a favorite charity you’d like people to donate to?

 

Fast forward to 2025:

Holy crap! I just asked Chatty G (Open AI’s ChatGPT) to write an obituary for me, not that my need is imminent. You just never know when you’ll be hit by that proverbial bus, though!

This was my prompt:

“Please write an obituary for me, based on what you already know about me. I’ll edit it from there. Thanks!”

I was surprised at how touching, funny, and accurate it turned out to be. I’ll definitely be editing it myself, but — for your amusement — I’ll share what Chatty G came up with in less than a minute: Obituary Draft (about me, by ChatGPT).

Notice that it ends with an offer: “Would you like help customizing it further—such as adding your favorite quote, listing specific survivors, or tailoring the tone (more lighthearted, formal, spiritual, etc.)?”

Next, I asked for some guidelines and received this: Elements of a good obituary — including downloadable Word and PDF templates! Click the link to learn more about each of these key elements:

Announcement of DeathBrief Biographical SummaryPersonal DetailsFamily InformationService InformationSpecial InstructionsClosing Sentiment (Optional)

Even if you don’t write your own obituary, or finish it, take a look at the suggested elements and use them for taking your own notes to leave behind.

NOTE: You don’t have to use ChatGPT. And your mileage may vary depending on how much you’ve used it before (how much it knows about you); whether you have a free or a paid version; or whether you’re using a different AI tool altogether. Don’t even worry about using AI. Just Google “How to write an obituary” on any web browser these days and you will get tons of ideas! (Um, spoiler alert: Google uses AI.)

 

I hope you find this helpful!

Have you written your own obituary? Do you know someone who has?

Do you think you’ll want to try it now that we’re talking about it?

Why or why not? Please share with us in the comments below!

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Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post! Click hereto ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton, Organized for Life andBeyond

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Once upon a time I wrote a blog post called Could You Live in a Tiny House? At the time, Tiny Houses were a trend both in real life and in the media. My perspective was based on having lived in a 200 sq. ft. small-t, small-h tiny house many years ago, long before I was an organizer and before I had accumulated many possessions.

In my response to one of the comments I wrote:

I fantasize about traveling in a tiny RV (like a Rialta). But not living full time.

Since then I have switched, fantasy-wise, from a Winnebago Rialta to a customized Mercedes Sprinter Van. The main attraction to a Rialta (besides the small, drivable size) was access to the driver’s seat from the living compartment, which most (but not all) vans also have. In the event that a quick getaway seems prudent, I don’t want to have to go outside and walk around to the cab.

But a Rialta is a Class B Motorhome. Plus, they are no longer being manufactured. And a campervan, aka van conversion, is even smaller than a Rialta.

 

Why a van and not an RV?

Trick question. A converted van is just a tiny RV! For more info on the various classes of RVs: What is a Recreational Vehicle (RV; Definition, Types, Dimensions & Costs and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Campervan.

So, why, then? Stealth! To anyone else who also lives in a van it would be obvious that someone is living inside, but I want to be able to park anywhere and not necessarily have everyone know. Some van conversions involve extra stuff on the roof (satellite, decking, storage, solar panels), or flares (side panel pop-outs, not to be confused with RV slide-outs), or extra vehicle height which would also give it away.

 

Am I planning to buy a van?

Will I ever, realistically, buy a converted van and live or travel around extensively in it? No.

I am getting too old and fat for that. And I need more access to medical care than I’d like to admit. (I’m sure there are people older than I am on the road, but they are also probably in better physical condition.) I also think the learning curve might be too much to rent one for just an occasional weekend. And the van customizations I would want would be cost prohibitive.

But a girl can dream, can’t she? Do you cook all the recipes you collect? Or make all the crafts you have supplies for?

Meanwhile do all my social media feeds think I’m in the market and show me every possible van conversion, design tool, and #vanlife video because I watch them all? Yes!

And do I have a mental list of deluxe features I would insist on having in my hypothetical van conversion? Of course! Basically, the more cool stuff you have in and on your van, the heavier it is and the more it will cost in materials, labor, maintenance, and gas.

 

Wish list of features

For starters:

Cab access — As previously mentioned, I want direct access to the cab from the living area.Permanent bed — A bed takes up a lot of space, but who wants to have to reconfigure the dining area every day? They even have beds that power up and out of the way to the ceiling.Toilet/shower — This is usually one of the biggest sticking points in terms of space and cost. But there are lots of clever ways to have both. Some vanlifers use portable toilets and gym memberships for the shower privileges (Planet Fitness or Anytime Fitness). I’m a fan of outdoor showers, but not in cold weather or in a populated area. It’s fun to see the variety of ways people have managed to build toilet/shower compartments, often sliding away and converting into seating or counter space. This video shows one woman explaining How I Built A Shower In My Van Without Losing ANY Space, including pros and cons near the end.Wi-Fi — I’ve already mentioned “extra stuff on the roof”, but I would still need WiFi.  My fantasy van would have a low-profile satellite-based Wi-Fi for internet access in the wilderness.Cooking — I wouldn’t need the fanciest kitchen, but I would need a stove burner, a microwave, combo airfryer/toaster oven, and small (but not micro) fridge/freezer.Windows — Some vans I’ve seen have too few windows. I would imagine there can be too many to maintain structural integrity, but I’d want as many as possible.Window covers — Most any kind of window covering will provide a degree of privacy, but the more expensive magnetic kinds do a better job of sealing off light coming from inside at night. I also like the kind that closes off the cab from the living compartment (so one doesn’t have to cover all the windows in the cab, too.

 

Is vanlife for everyone?

Heck no!

Vanlife isn’t for everyone. But it’s fun to fantasize about! People seem to love it…until they don’t. LOL?

Here is one of a gazillion 60-second #vanlife tours: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT6f1K9bv/ Some are picture-perfect snapshots of van life (sipping coffee in a clutter-free designer van while gazing out at an unobstructed view of the ocean); some focus on adventuresome lifestyles; and others are more about the logistics of having to find places to park, shower, and dump their compost toilets.

And here is a short video by someone who had a #vanlife career for several years and finally stopped and is happily living in a house: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT6fVyKfM/ (By “#vanlife career”, I mean she earned money as a social media influencer.)

 

Keeping a van organized

Most van occupants will admit they spend a lot of time tidying up and sweeping dirty floors. This is due to lack of space, an outdoor lifestyle that gets things dirty, and pets. You’d be surprised how many vanlifers have pets (usually, but not always, dogs).

As you can imagine, with space at a premium, it becomes even more noticeable when things are lying about. You have to be much more intentional about what you own, and how you store it, than if you had more available space. Think more about what you’ll need, and less about what you like or want.

Granted, I have not lived in a van or any other type of RV. But I’ve camped, backpacked, and traveled — and organized — enough to say the same organizing principles apply: Give each item a “home”; keep like items together; decide how much of any item you will keep on hand; don’t overflow your containers; make use of vertical space; put things away after you use them. And if you decide you need a gadget to containerize items or subdivide a space, measure a couple of extra times to be sure it will really do what you want and fit the space.

Additionally, though, and different from organizing a regular home, thought must be given to securing items so they don’t shift around while driving.

I think the best way to get ideas for van storage is to see what other people are doing. They’re (usually) not professional organizers, but they often will say what worked for them and what didn’t. Here’s a ton of Van Storage Ideas (Google Image search results).

 

A few more resources

VanSpace 3D — This is not the only tool available for designing a custom van layout, but it’s the one I’ve seen mentioned most often. I think it would take me for-e-ver to design a van, even with a definite wish list and a fantasy unlimited budget, because I know everything I want won’t fit.

Harvest Hosts — This site gives you access to unlimited overnight stays at farms, wineries, breweries, golf courses, community hosts & more. This is more fun than a Walmart parking lot, which is usually still good in a pinch. National parks are awesome, too, of course, but the rules about overnight parking, pets, etc., vary widely by location.

Vanlife Academy — This site provides “how to” lessons on every aspect of van life. Some are free and some are paid.

 

What about you?

Do you have an RV? Ever lived in a van? Ever wanted to?

What tips do you have to share with us?

Please share with us in the comments below!

______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.
Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post! Click here to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton, Organized for Life and Beyond

 ______________________________________________________________________________

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I just stocked up on something that might not interest you in the slightest. But it gave me peace of mind. And I’m curious what items you have stocked up on, and why.

In this post “stocking up” on something means to buy a large quantity of it, to have on hand for future use because you reasonably suspect, or know for sure, that there will be a future shortage of it. I’m not talking about buying a few extras of something you use all the time because it’s convenient to have them on hand. I’m not even talking about emergency supplies, which are also good to have, but which may never be needed, kind of like insurance. You can find some lists online and in my Emergency Preparedness Resource Roundup to help you prepare for natural disasters. But some of the same considerations definitely apply to all categories of extras, like how much you want to invest in them and how you will store them.

I know, I know — I’m usually talking about decluttering. (Exhibit 1: Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook.)

So you may be surprised to hear me saying there’s nothing wrong with stocking up on things.

This topic goes hand in hand with a previous post: Keep or Toss? “But I might need it someday!”

When is something worth stocking up on?

I say it’s worth stocking up on something if:

It’s your favorite thing that you use all the time, and it becomes scarce, or actually discontinued, and there seems to be no good substitute.You have the space to store it without sacrificing living space.You can find it when you need it. There’s no sense in piling things up that you can’t use because you can’t find them, or that you don’t use because you forgot you had them!You can afford it, financially.It requires little or no maintenance. It won’t spoil, or you have a system for swapping out expired items.

Discontinued Glad handle-tie trash bags (my favorites)

So, what did I stock up on?

I stocked up on Glad Handle-Tie 13-gallon white kitchen trash bags.

Why? Because I like them and I learned they’ve been discontinued. Boo! I thought they just weren’t available anymore in my particular local stores, so I’ve been buying them on Amazon. (eBay is another good source of discontinued items.) Soon, although they may still be technically available for awhile because someone else stocked up and is selling theirs at a premium price, they may become un-affordable and not worth it to me anymore.

How many did I buy? $100 worth. Two packs of 4 boxes = 8 boxes x 50 bags each = 400 trash bags. That’s $0.25 each. I’m sure they were cheaper last time I bought them, and I see they’re already selling for more than that. This is it. I do not plan to buy more.

What if you run out? Well, it’s not if, it’s when they run out. I’ve bought myself plenty of time, I think, to 1) not worry about it for awhile, 2) mentally adjust, and 3) find a suitable replacement. At a rate of two per week, these will last 4 years. (Depends on how I actually use them, of course. Just for fun I asked Chatty G (ChatGPT) how many uses it could think of for trash bags and here’s the list it came up with.)

How much storage space do they require? 9″ x 14″ x 18″ = 1.3 cubic feet.

(I haven’t opened the box they came in yet, or put them away. I do have a spot for them, though, and it’s not in the living room!)

Why do I like them so much? If I told you, it would just make you want them too, and you would buy them all up! No, not really, I’m sure you’re doing fine with whatever trash bags you already like. But I prefer the handle-tie ones. In case you’ve never paid attention to them, the handles are individual loops that you, um, tie together. They’re easy to use, hold as much as I need them to, don’t get too full or heavy, and they feel comfortable in my hand when carrying them out of the house to the trash bin. (Or whatever else I do with them.)

Meanwhile, I actively dislike all of these other varieties of trash bag: drawstring, twist tie, elastic drawstring, flap-tie (aka cross-tie or quick-tie). I also dislike flex trash bags. Why? Because they’re designed to hold not only bulky items, but more items. I don’t need them to hold more items! Just like purses, backpacks, and luggage, more items generally means a heavier bag.

How does stocking up work with organizing, decluttering, and minimalism?

In The Trouble with Minimalism, I wrote (favorably) about The Minimalists’ 20/20 Rule. Basically, anything they can replace for less than $20 in less than 20 minutes from their current location goes away. They do not get rid of things they use every day; only items they are saving just-in-case that are cluttering their lives unnecessarily because they might, in fact, never need them at all.

In my case, I can no longer get my favorite trash bags easily, or for a reasonable price, because they’ve been discontinued.

Then there’s my free Keep or Toss? “But I might need it someday!” chart, which weighs the Realistic Chances of Needing it Someday, against the Replacement Cost (Time + $$ + Energy), against the Potential Space Recovered. Basically, the lower the chances of your needing or using an item; the lower the replacement cost; and the greater the potential space recovered, the more likely it falls into the Toss category. (Toss = purge or let go of by donating, recycling, gifting, selling, or throwing away in the trash.) For more advice about setting limits read this post: A bag of bags. A box of boxes.

In my case, it is worth it to me to spend the money and devote the storage space to a stash of my favorite trash bags. 

 

What have YOU stocked up on? Or considered stocking up on?

Why? Were you glad? (Ha ha, just noticed the pun in proofreading, yes, I’m Glad!)

Or, did you simply manage without, or find a suitable replacement?

Are you overstocked on something you could get rid of to free up space and mental energy?

Please share with us in the comments below!

______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.
Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post! Click here to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton, Organized for Life and Beyond

 ______________________________________________________________________________

The post Stocking Up appeared first on Hazel Thornton.

Theme 1: Prologue

This is a story about growing up with my mom and music.

It’s easier for me to write about distant ancestors than it is to write about people I actually knew. Sometimes I get overwhelmed, partly because I know so much about them. I think: “I can’t include everything, but how can I narrow it down?” Or, “I need photos, dates, and evidence to back up my memories.” Or, “This will open a can of worms.” Or, “Who cares about this, anyway?”

Yes, I have many of the same thoughts that prevent many of you, too, from writing about your families. What do you think inspires people like me to write books like What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy – ?

So this story will be, by definition, imperfect. Imperfect in that it can’t possibly include everything, not even everything having only to do with music and (mostly) limited to a 12-year period of time. It’s a blog post, not a book.

After doing some newspaper research and getting overwhelmed by the number of times my mother was mentioned in conjunction with music, I allowed myself to simply reminisce.

I did not go digging through the family photos, many of which are still in Mom’s Boxes, or sort through my pile of piano music (and hers) for more titles. I did Google a few pieces that came to mind, and have provided links for your listening pleasure. OK, they’re for my listening pleasure, but I hope you enjoy them too!

Maybe there will be more later, but for now there’s this. I encourage you to just start somewhere and write what you know, too. You can add to it later if you want to.

 

Theme 2: Childhood

Growing up, our house was always full of music, thanks to my mom. At any given moment one could hear Mom playing the piano or marimba; classical or popular records playing on the stereo console; one of us kids practicing an instrument (piano, guitar, violin, clarinet); or Mom giving piano lessons or accompanying a singer rehearsing for a performance.

More than a Minister’s Wife

Most minister’s wives contribute to their church communities by supporting their husbands both publicly and behind the scenes, by planning and hosting events, and by offering aid and guidance to church members. My mom did all that while also being in charge of the music. If we weren’t at home or school, we were likely at church. When my three younger brothers and I were very young we sat in the front row during Sunday services while my dad preached and my mom played the organ. We tried our best to behave and to avoid nodding off. When we were older we, too, participated in youth groups and choirs. In addition to playing the organ, she accompanied various soloists, choirs, and ensembles on the piano. I’m only realizing now that her “Choristers” group was a secular group called The Boise Choristers.

In addition to playing classical, religious, and popular music, Mom liked to improvise. One of her favorite techniques was to play only the black keys. (Huh. I just found a YouTube tutorial about this. But she was doing it 50 years ago.)

 

The Sound of Music

When I was 8 years old, my mom took me to see The Sound of Music. It was released the same year we moved to Boise, Idaho (1965). It was not only a wonderful, commercially successful, award-winning movie, it was also memorable to me as the first film we’d ever seen together, in a theater, just us girls. So I felt special. Naturally, I think of her whenever the movie or one of its songs comes up, which has been countless times in the subsequent decades! She also took my little Brownie troop and my oldest younger brother to see Mary Poppins (another Julie Andrews musical) while we still lived in Cayuga, Indiana. It was our first movie in a theater!

Bandshell

How many times did we drive (or walk) down to Julia Davis Park, lay out a picnic blanket, and listen to a community band playing John Philip Sousa marches? Every 4th of July, for sure, but there were other times, and other types of music, as well. I Googled bandshell and was pleasantly surprised to see that the first Wikipedia photo example was our bandshell in Julia Davis Park! (What were the chances of that?!) I vaguely remembered there had been a fire, but did not know that it had been restored and renamed for jazz musician Gene Harris. (Here’s an article about its history. And this page  shows additional views including one from the grand opening performance in 1928.) I suppose this is where my love of outdoor concerts began.

Piano Lessons

Mom was my first piano teacher. After a couple of years, when we moved from Cayuga to Boise, she signed me up with Probably, if you had asked her, she would have said I had outgrown her capabilities for teaching me. But I think it was also to avoid mother-daughter squabbling. Also, I realize now that there probably were no other piano teachers in Cayuga. (There were no movie theaters, either. She had to drive us to Danville, Illinois for that.) Years later, she taught piano lessons again in our home to supplement her income.

I took lessons between the ages of 6 and 19. My brothers took lessons as well, but only for a few years each. When I was 17, Mom bought a Baldwin grand piano, which was so much nicer than our old upright that it became a pleasure to practice the hour or more a day that my teachers recommended!

Puppet on a String

One summer she bought Blooming Hits, an instrumental album by Paul Mauriat and his orchestra. The album spent five weeks at number one on the charts in 1968. We visited her parents in Albuquerque, and I remember dancing around like marionettes in Grandma’s living room (the only room with a swamp cooler) to the tune “Puppet on a String”. I’m talking Mom, and all of us kids, and maybe even Grandma, briefly. I see now that the whole album was only 26 minutes long. It was the soundtrack of our summer.

Puppet on a String

Here are some other things I remember listening to and watching as a kid:

Bunky the Monkey (A 10-minute children’s story with a symphonic background.)

Smothers Brothers Boil that Cabbage Down (This is a link to a television video clip, but we had the Golden Hits of the Smothers Brothers Vol 2 album.)

Copeland — Appalachian Spring

Peter and the Wolf (Young People’s Concert: “Young Performers No. 1” / Bernstein · New York Philharmonic. Did you ever watch that series?)

Walt Disney’s Fantasia (We saw the movie in a theater. Here’s an iconic scene: Sorcerer’s Apprentice).

Walt Disney’s Fantasia — The Sorcerer’s Apprentice

Popular Music

My first three albums as a teenager, which I requested and received for Christmas all at the same time, were Carole King – Tapestry; Paul McCartney – Ram; and Gordon Lightfoot – If You Could Read My Mind. So, 1971. And I remember buying Moody Blues – Every Good Boy Deserves Favour with babysitting money as a surprise gift for my mom. We had heard it somewhere and she had loved it. My plan, which worked satisfyingly well, was to just start playing it and see how long it took for her to realize what it was. Then I told her it was hers.

 

Theme 3: PerformancesFestival

For at least six years in a row, I played in the National Federation of Music Clubs (NFMC) Junior Festival. This involved memorizing two pieces (one required, one elective) and playing them for a panel of judges (and a roomful of other students and their parents). It wasn’t a competition with the other students, only an evaluation of one’s own skills and improvement. There was a range of ratings, the top being Superior. For every three Superior ratings, in three successive years, I was awarded a Gold Superior certificate, which happened twice. (Nowadays they apparently hand out gold cups instead of certificates.) I say I played “at least six years” because there were also a time or two when I “only” got rated Excellent.

 

Performances

In addition to Festival, there were piano student recitals of various types, school talent shows, and church performances. Mrs. Hoshaw sometimes took us to nursing homes to play for seniors. During that time my pieces came from Pour Les Enfants, a book I’ve been known to play through, cover to cover, as an adult. It only takes about 12 minutes because I only ever had the first book, pieces 1-12. Not only is it meant for children, the difficulty level is also clearly labeled Very Easy. I was always insulted by that because, at the time, they did not seem very easy to me!

Alexandre Tansman – Pour Les Enfants

Later there were Bach inventions. These two in particular:

Bach — Invention 13 in A Minor

Bach — Invention 8 in F Major

Duets

Mrs. Hoshaw had two pianos in her basement, where she taught lessons. She lived within walking distance of my house. I remember practicing and performing two-piano pieces in recitals with other students. And my mom occasionally convinced me to play duets with her (four hands, one piano), but this is the only one I remember, because it was simple and fun:

Country Gardens (piano duet)

Holsinger’s Music

After my youngest brother started school, Mom got a job working at Holsinger’s Music, where she worked for years at both locations. I, too, worked there (downtown) as a teenage stock girl. And my middle younger brother used to help move pianos for them. We all made good use of our employee discounts!

Idaho Statesman 1973

Boise State

Before I finished high school, my parents divorced, and Mom went back to school. She got a degree in Music Education at Boise State University (BSU), having previously graduated from Pacific Bible College in Long Beach, CA, where I was born. (I was born during finals, and she had to take one of her exams in the hospital!)

I, too, was a music major one semester, but it was mostly so my piano lessons would be free. To qualify, I had to take a bunch of other music classes, too, but it was never something I was thinking would be a career. By the same token I was an art major for a semester so I could have a locker in the art building. I only attended BSU for three semesters before taking a year off, moving to California, and eventually studying engineering.

Mom always said I played better than she did technically. She was referring to things like fingering, timing, and articulation. But she far surpassed me in musicality, improvisation, sight reading, composition, and transposition. If you know me today you might think I would have loved the Circle of Fifths, but I hated it. It just never “clicked”. I loved my childhood piano teacher, Mrs. Hoshaw, though. And I took great satisfaction in getting a piece, as she would say, “down to a gnat’s eyebrow”.

At BSU Mom and I had the same piano teacher, but not at the same time. I just found out (by Googling his obituary) that performed Gershwin’s “Rhapsody in Blue” for the inaugural concert of the Morrison Center of the Performing Arts in 1984.

Morrison Center

The Morrison Center for the Performing Arts wasn’t built until after I moved away from Boise. Prior to that, though, it had to be conceived, designed, approved, and funded. The closest my mom and I ever came to a political discussion was this:

Mom: Don’t forget to vote for the Morrison Center!

Me: I was planning to, but what if I didn’t want to? I can’t believe you are trying to influence my vote!

(Note: Current national politics would be the death of her, if she were still alive to see it.)

Musicals

In addition to regular student recitals and graded performances, Mom participated in theatrical productions like these:

Fiddler on the Roof — I think she was part of the chorus in this one, as was my middle younger brother.

Amahl and the Night Visitors — I don’t remember what she did in this one, but I seem to remember it involving a middle-eastern-ish costume.

Jacques Brel is Alive and Well and Living in Paris — She performed as part of the 5-person orchestra, along with jazz musician Gib Hochstrasser, whom we all knew from working at Holsinger’s Music.

A portion of a glowing review of Jacques Brel is Alive and Well and Living in Paris. Idaho Statesman 1974

Of course we watched all the musicals available to us — on TV, in movie theaters, and (less often) on stage — West Side Story, Brigadoon, Seven Brides For Seven Brothers, The King and I, Godspell, and more. I have not kept up very well, though. For example, I’ve seen Hamilton, but only on TV, and only once. Sorry to disappoint my theater friends!

 

Theme 4: Young AdulthoodClavinova

I left home, at age 19-1/2, the day after our church burned down. I swear I had nothing to do with it! And I did not have a piano during most of my young adult life. At one point, though, I owned a Clavinova — a very nice, full-sized keyboard, with 88 weighted keys, plus a matching bench, that looked like a piece of furniture. It also had recording capability.

That year the whole family gathered at my house for Christmas. We all lived in far-flung states and rotated hosting family events. One night Mom played a recital for us. I wanted to record her performance, but she wouldn’t let me. I am still sad about that. She played everything she knew, and she played it well. We didn’t know there wouldn’t be another chance. The performance lives only in our memories. (There are no recordings of me playing either, so there’s that.)

Here are two of my favorites:

Debussy – Claire de Lune (I, too, enjoyed playing this one, mostly after she was gone.)

Rachmaninoff – Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini – 18th Variation (Remember that time travel movie — Somewhere in Time — with Jane Seymour and Christopher Reeve?)

 

Theme 5: RepriseMom’s Piano

When she died, in 2001, my mother left me her Baldwin grand piano. Was I grateful? Yes. Is it sitting in my living room? Yes. Do I play it? Yes and no. Sometimes. Not lately. Never for an audience. Why not? Well, that’s a whole ‘nother story. Maybe I’ll tell it sometime, and maybe I won’t.

I can’t play anything close to as well as I did before I left home. But, in case you’re curious, here’s where I left off in my piano studies:

Brahms – Rhapsody Op. 79 No. 2 in G minor   (This was the last piece I played for an audience.)

Chopin – Etude Op. 10 No. 3  (I don’t remember performing this in public, but I played it a lot.)

Oh, I could probably still play the first movements of each, but certainly not the more challenging movements, and not completely by memory like I used to.

 

Theme 6: Coda

Here’s more — but by no means all there is to know — about my mom:

We Remember (a belated, bare-bones Ancestry memorial including a few photos and an obituary from the Idaho Statesman)

Mom’s Boxes Part 1: The shed (a 9-part blog series)

There are a few stories about her in my book What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy.

Gifts I Got from Mom (blog post)

 

That’s all for now.

Thanks for listening!

(I’m already thinking of things I could include but didn’t.)

Was there a “theme” to your life? What was it?

Have you ever tried writing about it? How did it go?

Please share with us in the comments below!

______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.
Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post! Click here to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton, Organized for Life and Beyond

 ______________________________________________________________________________

The post The Sound of Music appeared first on Hazel Thornton.

This is a portion of the mural at the RJ Donovan Correctional Facility. It is part of Lyle’s Green Space project, with Erik participating as lead painter.

Now that Erik and Lyle Menendez are eligible for parole — Menendez Miracle #6 — it no longer seems pointless to think about what they might do when they get out of prison.

Rehabilitation

The brothers have said that they’d like to continue the work they started in prison.

From Lyle’s resentencing statement:

I have worked hard to be a better person. I have taken on roles in inmate government, learning to help others solve problems, and in doing so, I began to develop greater self-worth and compassion. I have participated in self-help groups…built strong, healthy relationships with correctional staff, therapists and fellow inmates. I have learned to access professionals for support…I have learned to process anger instead of burying it…I have learned to ask for help when I need it.

If afforded an opportunity for another chapter of life beyond the prison walls, I plan to continue working with the sex abuse survivor community to spread awareness. I also plan to continue to serve the incarcerated population through community building to change the culture of corrections.

From Erik’s resentencing statement:

I was given the opportunity to serve others. I began caring for the elderly, the disabled, and the terminally ill. It may seem small, but that act of service changed everything for me. I mattered to others. I had purpose. I created the Life Care & Hospice program, and through that work, I discovered a new way of seeing life. I started focusing on living with purpose. I began to understand what it means to form a real connection — even in here. To be part of a community. To show up as a husband and a father, even from behind these walls. I began getting involved in self-help programs. I started educating myself, and then I began leading and encouraging others.

It’s this same sort of self-improvement and rehabilitation that Lyle and Erik hope to continue engendering in other inmates through special programs. The fact that they were mentoring other inmates while they, until now, had no hope of parole for themselves, speaks volumes about their characters.

 

Why Special Inmate Programs?

Erik Menendez created this logo for the Helping Without Prejudice Foundation.

I’ve learned that while the United States has 5% of the world’s population, it has 25% of its prisoners. The cost to taxpayers is $80 billion per year. The recidivism, or relapse, rate is 75%.

Meanwhile, the prison system in Norway has a recidivism rate of only 20%. This is inspiring and is known to have inspired the Menendez brothers, too.

Here’s a quote from the Halden Prison video I’ve linked to in the next section of this post:

It’s basically inserting humanity into the prison system…The punishment should be loss of freedom, not loss of dignity.

At the end of the day this is not just good for the prisoners and the prison, but society as a whole… the hope is to prepare inmates for life after they get out. Moving away from managing prisoners to creating good neighbors.

 

Prison Documentary Rabbit Hole

I’ve watched several documentaries recently about programs designed to humanize and rehabilitate inmates. In addition to benefitting the prisoners themselves, the programs have a positive impact on the prison system, the inmates’ families, and the nearby communities who either directly, or indirectly, benefit from the improved condition of inmates who are released.

Documentaries I’ve seen: Unleashing Hope: The Power of Service Dogs for Children with Autism — Hulu trailer on YouTube — Dogs are trained by Guide Dogs of America and inmates at Richard J Donovan Correctional Facility where Lyle and Erik are living.The Quilters — Netflix trailer on YouTube — Inmates make quilts for local foster children.EP 1 | PRISON CAT, GALILEO | THE CATS THAT RULE THE WORLD | SHEBA® — YouTube (20 min.) — A program in which inmates partner with the Humane Society to care for cats and get them adopted.Women inmates find hope with safe choir — YouTube (6 min. news segment)World’s Most Luxurious Prison | Halden Prison: Vacation For Murderers? — YouTube (45 min.) — I watched this one because Lyle and Erik have talked about being inspired by the Norwegian prison system.Related:Sing Sing — HBO Max trailer on YouTube — A film about the true story of a group of incarcerated men at ‘Sing Sing’ prison who participate in a theater program.Seeds of Change — PBS trailer on film’s website — An organic farmer in Maine sets out to transform the prison food system. (Since I haven’t seen it, it could be more about the farmer than the prisoners, but either way, I like the title.)6 Inspirational Prison Reform Documentaries You Need to Watch (article with embedded videos) — I saw the first one a while back and recommend it.Six Norwegian Prisons 1850 to 2020 (website) — Ideas, Spaces, Experiences

 

Musical Interlude:

Neema – Narok Prison Choir (song)

Zimbabwe Prison Choir (song)

X-Raided – Sins of the Father (official lyric video)

(keep reading for more on X-Raided)

What I’d Like to See

Better get used to 54- and 57-year-old Erik and Lyle Menendez, because they are one step closer to freedom!

These documentaries and websites are great, and many of them are only 20-30 min long. But they’re spread out all over the streaming platforms. And I’d like to see more.

What I propose (not that I have the connections to make it happen) is a series that brings them all together in one place, including some of the films that have already been made and adding as many new ones as are worthwhile and feasible. Here are my suggestions for new episodes of this fantasy series:

Erik Menendez’s programs established under the Helping Without Prejudice Foundation: Life Care & Hospice, Insight Meditation, VIVE (Victim Impact and Victim Empathy), and 12-Step Recovery with Insight Meditation.Lyle Menendez’s Green Space project: Rehabilitation Through Beautification: The Green Space Project (Lyle Menendez founder, Erik Menendez lead mural painter). Short video clip: How Lyle Menendez Wants to Totally REIMAGINE Correctional Facilities. This clip is from a very worthwhile 2 Angry Men podcast episode featuring both brothers who called in from prison. (P.S. The “2 Angry Men” are hosts Harvey Levin and Mark Geragos, not Lyle and Erik.)An episode about rapper Anerae Brown (X-Raided), including the recording studio he created at Richard J Donovan Correctional Facility, where he was incarcerated and became friends with Lyle and Erik. He credits them with mentoring him and helping him to get paroled after 26 years in prison. Watch this Surviving the Survivor podcast episode with guests Robert Rand and Anerae, who arrives @37 minutes in but is worth the wait.)Echo Yard, a special section of the Richard J Donovan Correctional Facility that allowed Lyle and Erik to create programs to help rehabilitate themselves and their fellow prisoners. (Article about Echo Yard)Additional episodes about other prisons and programs that benefit local communities.

 

What’s more inspirational than someone who has turned their life around?

And the people who help make that happen?

 

Have you seen any of these documentaries?

Which others have you seen and recommend?

What episodes or programs would you like to see?

Please share with us in the comments below!

______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.
Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post! Click here to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton, Organized for Life and Beyond

 ______________________________________________________________________________

The post Inspiring Prison Programs appeared first on Hazel Thornton.

Aedes aegypti

 

In my last post — Think of ChatGPT as a friend — I mentioned having consulted with ChatGPT (aka Chatty G) about mosquitoes:

Chances are that mosquitoes are more of an issue for me than they are for you. For one thing, my blood type is O negative, which has been shown to attract more mosquitoes than other blood types. Second, we have a new stealth breed of mosquitoes here in New Mexico — tiny, silent, goes for the ankles, invades homes (well, my home, anyway). Third, I have lymphedema, and scratching mosquito bites can quickly lead to infection.

Out of the plethora of ChatGPT uses, the main point of this new post is to share a relatable example of a chat with those who haven’t tried it. Of all the things it can help with, why not something mundane that’s “bugging” you? There really is nothing you can’t ask Chatty G about. Just remember to check sources, verify facts, and use common sense to evaluate responses, the same way you would if running something by a knowledgeable friend.

I have rearranged the discussion slightly, and divided it into main topics, but otherwise, all of the formatting is ChatGPT’s — numbered lists, bolding, etc.

NOTE:

If this seems like an overwhelming amount of detail,

rest assured that you can ask Chatty G to simplify or summarize its responses. 

Contents:Mosquito bite remediesHow to avoid being bittenBlood TypesNew “stealth mosquito” here in New MexicoWindow Screens

 

Mosquito bite remedies

You said:

How many mosquito bite remedies do you know?

ChatGPT said:

Plenty! Here’s a list of common and effective mosquito bite remedies — both home and over-the-counter — grouped by type:

Home RemediesIce Pack – Reduces swelling and numbs the itch.Aloe Vera – Soothes the skin and promotes healing.Honey – Has antibacterial and anti-inflammatory properties.Baking Soda Paste – Neutralizes pH and relieves itching.Apple Cider Vinegar – Antiseptic and itch relief.Lemon or Lime Juice – Antimicrobial, but be cautious with sun exposure.Toothpaste (especially with menthol) – Cools and numbs the bite.Oatmeal Paste or Bath – Calms irritation and inflammation.Tea Bags (especially green or chamomile) – Anti-inflammatory properties.Witch Hazel – Natural astringent and anti-itch.Essential Oils (like tea tree, lavender, or peppermint) – Antiseptic and soothing (must be diluted).Banana Peel – Folk remedy; some find it soothing.Onion or Garlic Juice – Anti-inflammatory and antibacterial.Over-the-Counter RemediesHydrocortisone Cream – Reduces inflammation and itching.Antihistamine Creams (e.g., diphenhydramine) – Blocks the itch response.Calamine Lotion – Soothes itching and dries out the bite.Topical Analgesics (e.g., lidocaine, benzocaine) – Numb the area.Oral Antihistamines (e.g., Benadryl, Claritin) – Help with severe reactions or many bites.After Bite Pens (ammonia-based) – Instant itch relief.Anti-itch Gels with menthol or camphor – Cooling relief.

So that’s at least 20 solid remedies, depending on what you have on hand. Want me to narrow these down to the fastest-working or most natural ones?

You said:

That’s a good list! Do you know about the hot spoon method?

ChatGPT said:

Yes — the hot spoon method is a clever home remedy!

How it works:

You heat a metal spoon under hot water (not scalding, just hot enough to tolerate), then press the back of the spoon gently against the mosquito bite for about 30 seconds.

Why it works:

Mosquito saliva contains proteins that cause the immune response (itching, swelling, etc.). Applying heat can:

Denature those proteins, reducing the reaction.Stimulate nerves around the bite, which can temporarily override the itch signal.

Caution:

Don’t use water so hot that it burns you.Not recommended for broken skin, kids with sensitive skin, or people with heat sensitivity.

It’s basically a DIY version of those heated itch-relief devices (like Bite Away or Therapik), and a lot of people swear by it.

Want to try it, or should I tell you about those devices too?

You said:

I’ve tried the spoon method, but I haven’t tried the heated itch relief devices you mentioned.

ChatGPT said:

Nice — since you’ve already tried the spoon method, you’ll probably really appreciate the heated itch relief devices. They’re kind of like the high-tech version of the same idea but more precise and safer.

Popular Heated Itch Relief Devices:Bite AwayGerman-made, FDA-cleared device.Heats up to ~124°F (51°C) and applies heat for 3–6 seconds.Battery-powered and super portable.Works for mosquito bites, bee stings, and even some itchy allergic reactions.People report almost immediate itch relief.TherapikSimilar idea but looks more like a little flashlight.You hold it on the bite for ~30 seconds.Uses a focused beam of heat, powered by a 9V battery.

Why they’re great:

No chemicals, creams, or mess.Work fast (some people feel relief in seconds).Great for people who get lots of bites or want a reusable solution.

The idea is the same: heat denatures the proteins injected by the mosquito, which short-circuits the body’s inflammatory response.

They’re a bit of an upfront investment ($20–$40 usually), but if you’re mosquito-prone or spend time outdoors, they can be a game-changer.

Want help comparing a few or finding the best-reviewed one?

NOTE:

I’ve tried almost all of these things and more in the name of research and self-preservation.

Many of them work, more or less, or in combination, and it depends on the person.

But I’d rather not get bit in the first place.

It didn’t mention the Bug Bite Thing.

I have just ordered myself a Bite Away to try!

P.S. I don’t always answer Chatty G’s last question before moving on to a new one.

 

How to avoid being bitten

You said:

How many methods can you list for avoiding mosquito bites?

ChatGPT said:

Oh, I’ve got a whole arsenal of mosquito-avoidance tactics — some classic, some clever. Here’s a big list broken into categories for clarity:

Topical Repellents

DEET-based repellents – Long-lasting and effective.Picaridin (e.g., Sawyer, Natrapel) – Less greasy and odorless.Oil of Lemon Eucalyptus – Plant-based but strong (CDC-recommended).IR3535 – Found in Avon Skin So Soft products.Permethrin-treated clothing – For serious protection.

Natural/DIY Repellents

Essential oil blends (citronella, lavender, peppermint, eucalyptus).Neem oil – Has mosquito-repelling properties.Vanilla extract + essential oils – Homemade repellent.Apple cider vinegar + water spray – Folk remedy.Garlic consumption – Mild deterrent effect through skin emission (debatable, but popular).

Clothing & Accessories

Long sleeves and pants – Physical barrier.Light-colored clothing – Mosquitoes are drawn to dark colors.Mosquito-repellent wristbands – Mixed effectiveness, but better than nothing.Mosquito netting – For beds, hammocks, or strollers.Hats with mesh face covers – Great for hiking or camping.

Environmental Control

Remove standing water – Buckets, flowerpots, birdbaths, etc.Use citronella candles or torches – Masks attractants.Burn mosquito coils – Repels via smoke and chemicals.Install window/door screens – Physical barrier indoors.Use fans – Mosquitoes aren’t strong fliers.Grow mosquito-repelling plants – Like basil, lavender, marigold, lemongrass.

Tech & Gadgets

Bug zappers – Controversial (attract more bugs than they kill), but some swear by them.UV light traps – Can be effective indoors.CO₂ traps – Mimic human breath to lure and kill.Ultrasonic repellers – Mixed reviews; not scientifically solid, but some people try them.Thermacell devices – Portable, heat-activated repellent zones.Mosquito-killing lanterns – Dual-purpose gear for camping/backyards.

Timing & Behavior

Avoid dawn and dusk – Peak mosquito hours.Stay indoors during wet, humid times – Mosquito prime time.Don’t wear scented lotions or perfumes – Attracts mosquitoes.Shower after sweating – Reduces body odor and CO₂ emissions.Sleep under nets or in screened areas – Especially in tropical regions.

So that’s 30+ methods right there — and if you’re layering several, you’re in mosquito-proof mode. Want a shortlist of the most effective combos or natural-only options? 

You said:

Yes, which ones are the most effective?

ChatGPT said:

Perfect — here’s a shortlist of the most effective ways to avoid mosquito bites, based on science and real-world results. These are the ones that actually work and are worth relying on, especially in high-risk areas:

Top 5 Most Effective Methods (Proven by Science)DEET-based repellentsGold standard.Effective for hours even in high mosquito density.Works on skin and clothing.Picaridin (20%) or Oil of Lemon Eucalyptus (30%)Great DEET alternatives.Picaridin: odorless, non-greasy.Lemon Eucalyptus: plant-based and CDC-recommended.Permethrin-treated clothingYou don’t apply it to your skin — treat your clothes, shoes, hats, etc.Kills mosquitoes on contact.Especially useful in hiking, camping, and tropical zones.Mosquito netting (especially bed nets with insecticide)Critical in areas with malaria or dense mosquito populations.Simple but incredibly effective while sleeping.Environmental control (eliminating standing water)Stops them from breeding in the first place.One of the most long-term effective methods for your home or yard.

Bonus Power Move: Thermacell Devices

Heat-activated and create a ~15-ft protection zone.Awesome for patios, camping, or outdoor work.Nearly scentless and doesn’t require applying anything to your skin.

Best Combo for Maximum Protection:

Apply Picaridin or DEET on skin.Wear permethrin-treated clothing.Use a Thermacell or mosquito net for stationary protection.Eliminate standing water around your home.

Want me to build a “best protection kit” based on where you live or what kind of activities you’re doing (like camping vs. backyard chill)?

NOTE:

Again, I’ve tried many of these methods with varying degrees of success. 

I forgot to ask about the burning ground coffee method.

T here are probably others I’ve tried as well and am forgetting to mention.

 

Blood Types

You said:

Do you know if there’s any truth to the theory that type O blood attracts mosquitoes?

ChatGPT said:

Yes — there’s actually some scientific support for the idea that blood type affects mosquito attraction, and type O blood does seem to attract mosquitoes more than other types.

What the research says:

A 2004 study published in the Journal of Medical Entomology found that mosquitoes landed on people with type O blood nearly twice as often as those with type A.The same study also noted that about 85% of people secrete a chemical signal through their skin that indicates their blood type — and mosquitoes can detect it.So if you’re a “secretor” with type O blood, you’re especially appealing to them.

Order of attractiveness (generally):

Type O – Most attractiveType B – Mid-rangeType A – Least attractive

But that’s just one piece of the puzzle. Mosquitoes are attracted by a combo of:

Carbon dioxide (your breath)Body heatSweat and skin bacteriaMovementScent (like lactic acid or even perfumes)

So even if you’re type A, if you’re sweaty, moving around, and breathing heavily — you’re still on the menu.

Want to know if you’re a “secretor,” or curious how that ties into other mosquito-attracting traits?

You said:

Yes, what is a secretor?

ChatGPT said:

Great question — it sounds like some sci-fi genetics term, but it’s real and kind of fascinating.

What is a “secretor”?

A secretor is someone who secretes their blood type antigens (A, B, AB, or O) into bodily fluids like:

SalivaMucusSweatTearsEven digestive juices

So, even if a mosquito doesn’t get to your blood immediately, it can “smell” or sense your blood type from those fluids on your skin — especially sweat.

How common is it?

About 80–85% of people are secretors.The rest (15–20%) are non-secretors, meaning their blood type antigens aren’t present in their body fluids, only in their actual blood.

Why it matters (especially for mosquitoes):

If you’re a secretor with type O blood, you’re likely extra appealing to mosquitoes because:

Your blood type antigens are present on your skin.Those antigens help mosquitoes zero in on their preferred targets.

It’s like you’re giving off a mosquito-friendly scent signature without even realizing it.

Can you find out if you’re a secretor?

Yes — there are tests for it:

Some DNA testing kits (like 23andMe) include this info.There are also specific saliva tests that look for blood type antigens.

Let me know if you want a link to a home test or how to DIY it — it’s kind of niche but fun to explore.

You said:

Which type of blood attracts the most mosquitoes? O negative, or O positive?

ChatGPT said:

Excellent question — and here’s where it gets interesting:

Mosquitoes seem to be drawn to type O blood, but…

They don’t distinguish between O-positive and O-negative, at least not in any studies we currently have.

Why?

Mosquitoes are attracted to blood group antigens (like A, B, or the lack thereof in type O) and chemical signals secreted by the skin — not the Rh factor (which is the + or – in your blood type).The Rh factor (positive or negative) doesn’t affect your scent or skin secretions in any way mosquitoes can detect.

So between:

O-positiveO-negative

There’s no known difference in mosquito attraction — both are equally tasty to them.

If you’re type O and a secretor, your chances of being a mosquito magnet are pretty high, regardless of the Rh factor.

Want to dive into what else can boost or reduce your appeal to mosquitoes (like specific body chemistry or diet myths)?

 

New “stealth mosquito” here in New Mexico

NOTE:

When I say “new” I mean its only been in New Mexico for a few years.

And “stealth mosquito” is my term for it.

You said:

Here in New Mexico we have a new type of mosquito that I’ve forgotten the name of. It is tiny, silent, and goes for the ankles. Do you know what it’s called?

ChatGPT said:

Yes, the mosquito you’re describing is likely the Aedes aegypti, commonly known as the yellow fever mosquito. This species has recently become established in Albuquerque and other parts of New Mexico. City of Albuquerque

Key Characteristics of Aedes aegypti:Appearance: Small, black mosquitoes with distinctive white markings on their legs and a lyre-shaped pattern of silver scales on the upper surface of their thorax.Behavior:Biting Habits: They are known as “ankle biters” because they often bite around the ankles and elbows. City of Albuquerque+3PCE Homepage | PCE+3San Gabriel Valley MVCD+3Activity Period: Unlike many other mosquito species that are most active during dawn and dusk, Aedes aegypti are active during the daytime, especially a couple of hours after sunrise and a few hours before sunset. The Paper.+2Source New Mexico+2City of Albuquerque+2Stealthiness: They are stealthy mosquitoes that feed by approaching from behind and targeting ankles and elbows. The Paper.+2City of Albuquerque+2PCE Homepage | PCE+2Habitat and Breeding:Proximity to Humans: These mosquitoes prefer to live near people, as humans are their primary blood source, and are commonly found inside homes. City of Albuquerque+1PCE Homepage | PCE+1Breeding Sites: They are container breeders, requiring only a small amount of water for larval development. Common breeding sites include rain barrels, bird baths, plant saucers, buckets, and other containers that can hold water. City of Albuquerque

Health Concerns:

Aedes aegypti mosquitoes are capable of transmitting several viruses, including Zika, dengue, chikungunya, and yellow fever. However, as of now, none of these diseases are known to occur in New Mexico. PCE Homepage | PCE+4Source New Mexico+4City of Albuquerque+4City of Albuquerque

Prevention Tips:

Personal Protection: Wear long sleeves and pants, apply insect repellent containing DEET or oil of lemon eucalyptus, and ensure window and door screens are intact to prevent mosquitoes from entering your home. City of AlbuquerqueEliminate Breeding Sites: Regularly inspect your property for standing water and remove it. This includes emptying and scrubbing containers like buckets, plant saucers, and bird baths at least once a week to destroy any eggs. City of Albuquerque

By understanding the behavior and habitat of Aedes aegypti, you can take effective measures to reduce their presence and minimize the risk of bites. Source New Mexico+1Wikipedia+1

You said:

How common is the Aedes Aegypti mosquito in the United States? In which states can it be found?

ChatGPT said:

Aedes aegypti, commonly known as the yellow fever mosquito, is prevalent in various regions across the United States, primarily in the southern and southeastern areas.

Current Distribution:

Southern and Southeastern States:High concentrations of Ae. aegypti are found in states such as Florida, Texas, Louisiana, Georgia, Alabama, and South Carolina.These regions offer warm and humid climates, ideal for the mosquito’s breeding and survival.Western States:The mosquito has expanded its range into parts of the western United States, including California and Arizona. wrbu.si.eduNortheastern Reach:Ae. aegypti has been detected as far north as New York, New Hampshire, and Indiana, though these occurrences are less common. CDC+2Oxford Academic+2EHP Publishing+2

Factors Influencing Distribution:

Climate Conditions:EHP Publishing+2Nature+2wrbu.si.edu+2The mosquito thrives in tropical and subtropical climates. However, warming temperatures have facilitated its spread into more temperate regions.Urbanization:Time+1Nature+1Ae. aegypti is highly adapted to urban environments, often breeding in artificial containers like buckets, tires, and flowerpots found in residential areas.

Health Implications:

Aedes aegypti is a primary vector for viruses such as dengue, Zika, chikungunya, and yellow fever. The expansion of its range heightens the risk of these diseases in newly affected areas. CDC

Preventive Measures:

Eliminate Standing Water: Regularly remove water from containers to reduce breeding sites.Use Insect Repellents: Apply repellents containing DEET or picaridin when outdoors.Install Window Screens: Ensure windows and doors have screens to prevent mosquito entry.

Understanding the distribution and behavior of Aedes aegypti is crucial for implementing effective control strategies and minimizing the risk of mosquito-borne diseases.

NOTE: 

After each section I was offered more resources than I have included in this post.

 

Window Screens

You said:

Do you know if regular window screens will prevent that new small type of mosquito from entering the house?

ChatGPT said:

Great question — and an important one with Aedes aegypti on the rise.

Short answer:

Yes, regular window screens can help, but only if they’re in perfect condition — no holes, no gaps, and with mesh small enough to stop tiny insects like Aedes aegypti.

Details:

Aedes aegypti are smaller than most mosquitoes — about 3–4 mm long.Standard window screen mesh (usually 18×16 mesh, meaning 18 strands per inch in one direction and 16 in the other) will block most mosquitoes, including Aedes aegypti.But because they’re stealthy and small, even tiny tears, bent frames, or gaps around windows can let them in.

Tips to make screens mosquito-proof:

Inspect regularly for holes or wear — even pinholes can let them through.Use tighter mesh (like 20×20 or no-see-um mesh) for extra protection.These are finer and still allow airflow.“No-see-um mesh” is often used in areas with tiny biting flies and works great for Aedes aegypti.Seal gaps around window frames with weather stripping or caulk.Keep windows closed at dawn and dusk, or when lights are on inside at night — it reduces attractants.

Want help finding where to buy no-see-um mesh or how to DIY screen upgrades for your home?

You said:

Yes, please.

ChatGPT said:

Upgrading your window screens to no-see-um mesh is an effective way to keep out tiny insects like the Aedes aegypti mosquito. Here’s how you can do it:

Sourcing No-See-Um Mesh Screen Material:

No-see-um mesh has a tighter weave (typically 20×20 strands per inch) designed to block smaller insects. Here are some options:

Phifer No-See-Um Fiberglass Screen Mesh: Available in various sizes, such as 36 inches x 25 feet and 48 inches x 25 feet. These can be found at retailers like Home Depot. Amazon+2The Home Depot+2The Home Depot+2Online Retailers: Platforms like Amazon offer no-see-um mesh rolls in different dimensions to suit your needs. Amazon DIY Window Screen Replacement Steps:

Replacing your window screens is a manageable DIY project. Here’s a general guide:

Remove the Old Screen: Carefully take out the screen frame from your window. Use a flathead screwdriver to pry out the old spline (the rubber cord holding the screen in place) and remove the damaged screen. DIY Playbook+1YouTube+1The Home Depot+3adfors.com+3Lowe’s+3Measure and Cut the New Screen: Lay the no-see-um mesh over the frame, ensuring it overlaps the frame’s edges by about 1 inch on all sides. Cut the mesh to size, leaving excess to ensure a tight fit. The Home DepotInstall the New Screen: Position the mesh over the frame. Using a spline roller tool, press the spline over the mesh into the frame’s groove, starting from one corner and working your way around. Ensure the mesh remains taut to prevent wrinkles. DIY Playbook+2The Home Depot+2adfors.com+2adfors.comTrim Excess Mesh: After securing the spline, use a utility knife to trim any excess mesh from the edges for a clean finish. Additional Tips:Tools Needed: Ensure you have a spline roller, utility knife, scissors, and possibly a flathead screwdriver. Some kits may include these tools.Lowe’s+2The Home Depot+2DIY Playbook+2Pre-Framed Screen Kits: If your frames are damaged or you’re looking for convenience, consider purchasing pre-framed screen kits that you can assemble and install. Reddit

For a visual walkthrough, here’s a helpful video guide:

LINK TO HELPFUL YOU TUBE VIDEO:

(It was embedded in the original chat.)

Replacing a Window Screen 5-Steps

You said:

Do you know which company is in Albuquerque will re-screen windows and use the 20 x 20 mesh?

ChatGPT said:

Yes, in Albuquerque, several companies offer window re-screening services and can install 20×20 mesh to enhance protection against smaller insects like Aedes aegypti mosquitoes. Here are some local options:

NOTE:

At this point it showed me a local map of companies that do window screening.

It chose one in particular that “offers different mesh materials” but I suspect they all do, 

and that this was just the only one that included those words in their website copy.

None of them talked specifically about mosquitoes.

Recommendations:

Contact the companies directly: Discuss your specific needs, such as the installation of 20×20 mesh, to ensure they can accommodate your request.Inquire about mesh options: Confirm that the 20×20 mesh is available and suitable for your window frames.

By reaching out to these local businesses, you can enhance your home’s defense against mosquitoes and other small insects.

NOTE:

After each section, ChatGPT offered a chance to rate its reply:

The icons represent: Copy; Good response; Bad response; Read aloud; Edit in canvas;

Switch model (I have not tried any of the other models)

 

What relatable thing have you chatted with ChatGPT about?

Were you satisfied with the chat?

What might you ask it about next time?

Please share with us in the comments!

______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.
Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post!  Click here  to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton,  Organized for Life and Beyond

 ______________________________________________________________________________

The post Mosquitoes: A Chatty G Consultation appeared first on Hazel Thornton.

As interested as I am in Artificial Intelligence (AI), and as pervasive as it is becoming in our daily lives, I seem to only manage one blog post per year about it. Suffice it to say that a lot can, and does, happen in a year! So, consider this your annual update.

Progress!

Click image to read “An Interview with ChatGPT” (2023)

For example, some of you will remember what ChatGPT had to say, in my post, An “Interview” with ChatGPT (April 2023), under “Reality Check”, about the books I have written. It named three books with entirely plausible-sounding but utterly fabricated titles. Not only had I not written them, but no one else had either!

At that time ChatGPT had no direct access to the internet and its knowledge cutoff date was September 2021. This time, however, it gave me the correct titles of my three books PLUS clickable links to their pages on Amazon and Goodreads!

Why am I writing about AI?

I’m no AI expert. My goal in writing about it is not to convince you to use it. I just want to demystify it a bit and let you know how I’ve been using it. One of my organizing colleagues, Jamie Steele, a productivity coach at Tidy Your Time, LLC, refers to ChatGPT as “Chatty G” which I think is adorable. It also dovetails with a thought I’ve had that might help you, too, when you are using it: Think of ChatGPT as a friend. (Keep reading to see why.)

Contents:AI affects us allThink of ChatGPT as a friendSome of the ways I’ve used ChatGPT latelyPersonal MemoriesGenealogyMosquitoesWritingMedicalVoice ModeCAUTION: Things to watch out forSynopses, Sources, and HallucinationsEnergy consumptionPrivacyAI affects us all

Examples of AI in Everyday Life. I know you can’t read this. Click the image to see the search results and links to more info.

AI is kind of like politics: It affects your life whether or not you are interested or pay attention to it. Here are some Examples of AI in Everyday Life (Click the link or the image to see the larger, clickable search results)

In The AI Gold Rush (May 2024) I mentioned that there were now thousands of new AI applications. They mainly fall into the two following categories:

Predictive AI such as Google and Netflix searchesGenerative AI such as chatbots, image creation, research and writing tools

It’s more complicated than that, of course, but notice that chatbots (like ChatGPT) are not the same as search engines. They are Large Language Models (LLMs) with increasing access to the internet, but they do not replace search engines. If you want to know something factual, especially if it happened yesterday, it’s best to Google it. There are many different chatbots available, as discussed in this representative article: The best AI chatbots in 2025 (Miguel Rebelo for Zapier, March 4, 2025)

Click image to read “The AI Gold Rush” (2024)

If you aren’t sure which one to pick, there’s no reason not to try them all. Most offer a free version and a paid version with extra features. Some allow a certain amount of usage per day and that provides a built-in opportunity to try another one (if you really have that many questions or uses for it). You can even install Chrome’s Multi AI Sidebar to make it easy.

For purposes of this blog post, though, I’m sticking with free ChatGPT 4o. I think my head might explode if I branch out much further!

Think of ChatGPT as a friend

What do I mean by that? Well, I take everything Chatty G says with a grain of salt, just like I would if I were discussing a problem with a friend. Friends are (often) not doctors or lawyers or historians. Friends can make mistakes. But that doesn’t mean it’s worthless to ask a friend for advice or run something by them. Some friends are more knowledgeable than others, and sometimes they confirm things you already think, or steer you away from faulty thinking, and add some insight you’ve never considered. They can help you organize your thoughts, or your data.

I have heard that some people use chatbots as therapists of sorts. I mean, Chatty G is not a licensed healthcare professional, but it’s a good sounding board. If it’s not a life-or-death issue, why not run it by Chatty G? It might even advise you to seek the help of a therapist!

 

Some of the ways I’ve used ChatGPT lately:Personal Memories

No amount of Googling was helping me find the name of the festival I used to play in each year as a piano student in 1970s Boise, Idaho. It didn’t really help that I was calling it a “competition” because it wasn’t, really. There were judges and ratings, but there were as many high (or low) ratings as there were students who deserved them. One of my memories was that I earned six Superiors in consecutive years and was therefore awarded two “Gold Superiors” (one for each set of three years). Well, they’re apparently called “Gold Cups” these days (trophies instead of certificates), and after I provided a few more details ChatGPT figured it out. (I was going to share the entire chat, but the link isn’t “sticking” for some reason. Contact me if you are curious about how the conversation unfolded, and what the festival was like.)

Genealogy

AI is used for all sorts of genealogy tasks, like record transcription, image enhancement, and language translation. All of the big platforms like Ancestry, FamilySearch, and MyHeritage are constantly leapfrogging each other in terms of tools and capabilities. I’m still following the Facebook group called “Genealogy and Artificial Intelligence (AI)” where even the genealogy experts are still experimenting and sharing both their successes and their failures. Most of them have either developed, or will soon, their own instructional videos, blog posts, and classes related to AI usage.

I used Stephen Little’s prompt (“Fun Prompt Friday!” posted on Feb 28, 2025) to create a “Parke County, Indiana Locality Guide”. Having gathered most of the sources myself over the years I can report that it did a pretty good job!

I also fed ChatGPT a family history I once wrote to see what it might notice about it. I asked questions like this:

Are there any conclusions you can make that are not already stated in the article?Do you have any suggested resources for further research into the lives of these families?

I can’t say I’ve broken my brick wall on that branch of my family yet, but ChatGPT did give me some historical context and other things to think about and try!

In An “Interview” with ChatGPT (April 2023), under “Should we fear AI?”, I wrote about AI-generated images. Take a look at this video to learn more about how AI can affect our use of historical photos: Fact or Fiction? Comparing Photo Tools with ChatGPT. (I will admit to only having watched the first 6-1/2 minutes of it. So you have my permission to stop at that point, too.)

Mosquitoes

Chances are that mosquitoes are more of an issue for me than they are for you. For one thing, my blood type is O negative, which has been shown to attract more mosquitoes than other blood types. Second, we have a new stealth breed of mosquitoes here in New Mexico — tiny, silent, goes for the ankles, invades homes (well, my home, anyway). Third, I have lymphedema, and scratching mosquito bites can quickly lead to infection.

I had quite the chat with Chatty G about mosquitoes, remedies, and prevention methods. (Not sure why the link doesn’t “stick”, so contact me if you’d like to see the chat in its entirety. I may even write a whole new blog post about mosquitoes next.)

Writing

I have yet to really use AI for writing. But I know a lot of writers with questions about AI. I never even used grammar- or spell-checkers until they became default features of word processing programs such as Co-Pilot for Word. I have, however, like most writers who have ever lived, used a human editor, a thesaurus, and other such writing tools. I also Google words to make sure they mean what I think they mean, and topics to learn more about them.

But I do want to share that there are uses for AI that won’t get your term paper sniffed out by AI detectors or your book rejected by Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP). The KDP link describes the difference between material that is AI-generated (requires disclosure) and AI-assisted (does not require disclosure).

Surprisingly, I found this post by Open AI, the creator of ChatGPT — Writing with AI: Five ways professional writers are leveraging ChatGPT — to be more helpful than self-serving. Among other things, it says, “Writers are using ChatGPT as a sounding board, story consultant, research assistant, and editor—to talk out ideas, find the right word, clarify their thinking, and get feedback on structure and flow.” Another good one along these lines is this: Does Using Grammarly Make My Content get Detected as AI-Generated? The Results Are In (Jonathan Gillham for Originality.ai, October 24, 2024)  Spoiler alert: It depends.

One thing to watch for in reading articles these days is whole chunks of text, or distinctive phrases, that are repeated. Bad editing? Or AI? Sometimes it’s both.

Medical

In my experience doctors often fail to sufficiently warn patients of drug interactions and ways to make them more or less effective. Or, even if they do, it’s easy for a patient (OK, for me) to forget. And, if it’s a medication you’ve taken for years, you may not think to ask a pharmacist about it and may still not know (or have forgotten) it needs to be taken on an empty stomach, or that you should avoid dairy, or citrus, or sunlight, or whatever, while you are taking it. Google has a lot of helpful info on drugs but sometimes it’s hard to assemble it all in a meaningful manner.

I had a couple of new medications that I wanted to ask ChatGPT about. I think I’ll keep this chat to myself, but the bottom line was that I did change my medication schedule as a result, but not precisely the way ChatGPT outlined it for me.

Voice Mode

The other day I was trying to work with Ziggy, my cat, in my arms. So I clicked the microphone on, thinking it was a dictation feature like I have in Word. I was expecting to see my spoken words typed out, and for Chatty G to type an answer in return. But no. Instead, I was offered several different Chat personas, with assigned names and unique voices. I chose one and asked “her” something about Social Security (without mentioning my actual SSN, of course). I noticed that chat got auto-labeled “Email clarification request” (which is not wrong, but which wasn’t helpful in searching for it later, whereupon I edited the chat name to something more meaningful). I noticed there were two voice-looking modes and asked her:

Q: “What is the difference between dictation and voice mode?”

A: “Dictation mode is usually for converting spoken words into text, like when you’re using speech-to-text. Voice mode, on the other hand, involves interacting with a device or software through spoken commands, like having a conversation.”

OK, got it! No wonder people like chatting with Chatty G!

The lesson here is that anything you want to know about ChatGPT, you might as well ask ChatGPT about directly, like I did in An “Interview” with ChatGPT (April 2023)

 

CAUTION: Things to watch out forSynopses, Sources, and Hallucinations

As far as AI has advanced in the generative arena, one must still exercise caution. For example, the AI-generated synopsis you can now often find at the top of many Google search results can be very handy. And it can be wrong. Worse, it can be so mostly-right that you might miss a crucial detail that is false.

If, during your private tête-à-tête, Chatty G offers up source  links, click them to see if they are good. Check everything that is supposedly factual. Experiment with topics you are familiar with so you can learn to spot errors.

The term for ChatGPT making stuff up is “hallucinating”. Some have suggested that “confabulation” is a more accurate term, but hallucination is the term that’s being used currently.

Energy consumption

There are many articles by now about how inefficient AI tools are in terms of energy consumption. Compared to what, though? Many of the articles that look promising to me are behind annoying paywalls. I did find one that says that a ChatGPT question uses 10X more energy than a Google search. That sounds like a lot, but I’ve seen enough Chats to know that initial and subsequent prompts vary widely in their scope (and surely in their energy consumption). So we may be comparing apples to oranges. Other articles say ChatGPT is not bad for the environment compared to other types of energy-intensive activities. And most agree we need more transparency in the industry.

At some point I think it will be clearer how much of an environmental stand it would be to eschew AI usage. And I think there are still plenty of times when a Google (or similar) search is best. But there are also times when the answer is elusive and only a good Chat will suffice.

Privacy

Here is an example of one of the many articles behind paywalls with an irresistible headline: The Five Things You Shouldn’t Tell ChatGPT (Nicole Nguyen for Wall Street Journal, March 30, 2025). Subtitle: “Don’t let your mystery rash become AI training fodder—or turn up in a data breach.” Let me guess — you also should not upload your Social Security number or other identifying information into a ChatGPT. Also, as with any online platform, you should check your settings. All of them. And if you update your computer, or ChatGPT gets updated, you should check your settings again.

 

How are you using AI?

Do you have a favorite chatbot?

What concerns you the most about AI?

What do you enjoy the most about AI?

Please share with us in the comments!

______________________________________________________Hazel Thornton is an author, genealogist, and retired home and office organizer.
Book:  Hung Jury: The Diary of a Menendez Juror Book:  What’s a Photo Without the Story? How to Create Your Family Legacy Book:  Go With the Flow! The Clutter Flow Chart Workbook Feel free to link directly to this post!  Click here  to ask about other uses.Copyright 2025 by Hazel Thornton,  Organized for Life and Beyond

 ______________________________________________________________________________

The post Think of ChatGPT as a friend appeared first on Hazel Thornton.