Ingrid Kelada's Blog

What do You do When Feel Unhappy?

Everyone has days when they feel down. What do you find helps you on those gloomy days? Do you go out for a meal? Maybe see a new movie? Visit a friend? Take a walk? Do you get a buzz from jogging or going to the gym?

Maybe you find it energizing to go shopping. Or perhaps you treat yourself to an ice tea with friends to overcome your unhappiness.

We all have our preferred methods to shake off a dreary day. Sometimes those things are enough to make us feel better in the moment. But science tells us something interesting about achieving real happiness.

Right now, scientists are in the process of showing us how happiness can only come to us through internal change and positive daily habits. Other things might lift our moods for the moment, and that’s not a bad thing to do. But real, lasting happiness doesn’t come from keeping up with the latest movies or sharing a round of cocktails or beer with friends.

Learn Meditation as a Happiness Habit

Consider the research by Richard Davidson, a neuroscientist at the University of Wisconsin and Jon Kabat-Zinn from the University of Massachusetts Medical Centre.

The study involved 41 stressed, but otherwise healthy, individuals working in a biotechnology firm in Wisconsin. 25 participants were taught mindful meditation, in which you focus on what you’re experiencing in the present moment, such as emotions, thoughts, and other sensations. The group of 25 met for a few hours each week to learn mindful meditation. Each member of the group was also asked to meditate at home using a guided meditation for one hour per day. Then after six weeks of training, all attended a meditation retreat.

The other 16 were held as a control group and did not receive meditation training until the study was completed.

After eight weeks, researchers collected data on brain function in areas that activate when we feel positive and happy. The results confirmed that the participants who were taught meditation had increased brain function in these areas as well as a measurable boost in their immune systems.

Not only did using their minds help these study subjects feel happier, it also helped their bodies become healthier, too!

Not for You? Try this!

You think meditation is not for you? You’ve tried it a few times and it didn’t work for you? You’ve read the research but you are just too busy or active? That’s what I thought, and then I learned that there are many ways to meditate. If you can breathe, you can meditate! I have explored different ways of meditating that fit with my “excited” personality and my favorite is walking meditation. I even have downloaded a guided walking meditation app from here.

You can learn more on how to increase happiness in my book, 21 Days to Happiness. Chapter 18 guides you through setting up your own simple daily meditation practice. Try it today!
 
Ingrid Kelada
Business Psychologist/Happiness Expert
KCC Inc.

Creativity or Problem-solving
One of the amazing things about humans is our constant endeavor to create or improve things. When we are inspired to create something, we demonstrate our passions or talents. When we run into a problem, we want to fix it and come up with a solution. These days it’s not unusual to complain about something and hear someone say in response, “There’s an app for that!”.

Whether we are trying to express our creativity or simply  improve our lives, coming up with something new seems to make us happy!
 
Inventions are all around us. From books and music to sports and games to comfort items to technological gadgets aimed at making life simpler. Someone created every one of them!
 
Any form of creativity is enough to fill us with happiness. Think of the joy that comes from cooking a special meal, decorating your office, coming up with a tool for your job or playing a song. The creator enjoys this happiness that comes from the pride of putting in the effort and seeing the final result.
 
Creating is great, sharing is better
But the joy goes far beyond the creator. We feel happiness and wonder when we see an amazing photograph or a  winning touchdown. Creating something is an incredible way to share joy with the people around you and to fill your own life with happiness, too.
 
Each day, develop the habit of noticing created things, from complex tools like the internet to the simple necessities so easily taken for granted, like a doorknob. Celebrate the examples of artwork or inventions you pass in your day to day life. Maybe you spot a magazine on the table with a great cover, hear a great song at the coffee shop or a colleague just shared something to improve things at work.
 
What Can You Create?
We live in an amazing world, and when we remember that, it helps boost our happiness and sense of wonder. And as part of the human race, that ability to create resides in all of us. What sorts of things are you good at creating? Maybe you’re good at cooking or organizing. Perhaps you’re a great fisherman, handy with your hands or gifted at spontaneous one-line jokes. Celebrate your talents and share them with others around you. Here’s one final thought to leave you with:
 
“The secret of happiness is this: let your interest be as wide as possible, and let your reactions to the things and persons that interest you be as far as possible friendly rather than hostile”—Bertrand Russell.
 
BE HAPPY!

This is the perfect time of year to boost your happiness by going outside every day. What's amazing is you don't have to spend hours outdoors in order to receive the happiness benefits. Just a few minutes each day is usually enough to make a big difference in our levels of happiness and energy.

Going outside is free. It's easy. And it offers some pretty significant benefits to our health. Here are just 3 of the reasons to put going outside on your daily calendar starting this week.

1-You Need Sunlight to Make Vitamin D
Your body makes vitamin D while you're out in the sun. Researchers believe at least 1 billion people suffer from vitamin D deficiency.  When we don't get enough vitamin D, we can begin to experience symptoms of a vitamin deficiency, such as fatigue, increased vulnerability to illness, back pain, and even depression. 

OMG! All those things would make it difficult for anyone to experience happiness. The great news is that all you have to do to "right the ship" so to speak is to start spending time outside. Try to spend at least 15 minutes outdoors at a time of day when the sun is high in the sky. At least 15 minutes on a daily basis is enough for many people to maintain a healthy level of vitamin D. The darker your skin is, the longer you need to be in the sun to create vitamin D.

2-Nature Brings Us Peace
The sound of the wind in the trees or waves gently lapping the shore can ease tension in our bodies and help us relax and forget about daily worries. Watching living creatures like birds, butterflies, and even fish can lower our stress levels and help us remember how big and beautiful our world is.

Going outside also allows us to mentally clock out  and get away from our computer screens. Staring at something only a few inches from our faces for long periods of time can stress our eyes. Taking a walk outside allows our eyes to focus on objects far away and lets those muscles we use on the computer have a rest.

3-Nature Allows Us Opportunities to Connect
Another benefit to spending time in nature is it allows us opportunities to authentically connect with others. Take a friend or loved one on a picnic and notice the difference in the way you connect while you're out and away from distractions like your computer and TV.

Try leaving your phone in the car or in a bag where you won't be tempted to keep checking it. Be present in nature, in the moment shared with your friend or loved one. Those authentic connections also allow us opportunities to relax and ease stresses we may be feeling. They also allow us to create new memories with people we care about, which gives our happiness another boost every time we think back on those great experiences.

Try This
Look at your calendar for this week and create opportunities to go outside. You can start small if you want, and just schedule yourself a fifteen minute break outside each day to drink your coffee, meditate, or people watch. After a week of doing this, see if you notice a difference in your mood. I predict you'll feel happier and more energetic.

Learn More About Nature and Happiness
For more research and tips on how nature can positively impact our happiness, check out Day 6: Nature: Step Outside for Happiness in my book 21 Days to Happiness . Buy 21 Days to Happiness

Did you know...
 
According to the Statistic Brain website, 76% of people cite money and work as the main causes of their stress.
 
As an organizational psychologist and happiness expert, I can tell you that people think it's normal to be stressed, overwhelmed and tired, but it's not! Certainly, when experiencing it, stress gives energy, but in the long run, it hurts our performance.
 
Stress is the answer to a perception of danger. In difficult situations, the adrenaline released allows us to be fast, strong and agile. It's very practical in the moment, but in the long term it harms our physical and psychological health.
 
Here are the 2 most effective tips I recommend in my practice.

1-Breathe Slowly and Deeply

By slowing down our breathing, we send a signal to our brain that we are in control. This allows us to react better because we are more effective when we are calm than when anxious or exhausted.
 
A practical tool to control our breathing is cardiac coherence. This method of monitoring heart rhythms was discovered by American researchers and then widely publicized by Dr. David Servan-Schreiber.
 
It is believed that the average number of complete breaths that is related to positive emotions and well-being is between 5 and 7 per minute, depending on the person. By "complete breathing" we mean long, deep inhalations and total exhalation: the cycle is about 10 seconds in total (5 seconds of inhalation, 5 seconds of exhalation).
 
Quick tip: try this…To guide you with your breathing, here is a video with  instructions.
 
In addition, I suggest you download the APP RespiRelax-iOs or RespiRelax-Android on your smartphone, so you can easily "de-stress" between crises in about five minutes!
 
2-Learn to De-dramatize

Stress, as previously mentioned, is caused first and foremost by our perceptions or interpretation of events. If you think a situation is severe or negative, your stress automatically increases. Conversely, if you think there is a solution to everything and that things could be worse, your stress decreases.

One thing I love to do to help de-dramatize comes from the book Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff . The book poses the question “will it matter a year from now?”. Usually, the answer is NO! Most of the time, we are stressed with things that are usually quickly resolved. We tend to manage multiple emergencies and crises per week to which we most often find solutions. I always say: “if there is not a solution, there is a lesson!”
 
Quick tip: try this… Since I am not a physician, when dealing with problematic situations at work, I often say to myself: "There are no lives in danger" and this allows me to regain my composure in order to find the best way to deal with the issue.
 
Do you want to know more?
 
You can learn more tips on managing stress in my book,  21 Days to Happiness , in chapters 12 and 13.
 
21 Days to Happiness is a practical guide offering 21 different simple techniques to try for 3 weeks in order to increase your happiness, productivity and energy. Do you have 10 minutes a day?

BIG NEWS: In just a few weeks, 21 Days to Happiness will be available in an interactive eLearning version! Get THE 21 Days to Happiness BOOK NOW!

What do you buy the person who has everything?
Have you heard people ask this question? Sometimes it seems overwhelming to try to think of a gift for a friend, coworker or loved one when they seem to have everything they could ever want already. It's probably because you're thinking of giving them a thing, an object, something they could easily buy. I'm going to tell you a secret about gift giving that will change how you think about birthdays, anniversaries and Christmas celebrations. Ready? Here it is: the best gifts aren't items. They're experiences.

Opportunities to Buy Experiences Are All Around Us
Look around your community for local events and experiences. Take a music-loving friend to hear a community orchestra or a jazz ensemble. Find a new park or trail to hike together and pack some fun snacks to share along the journey. Is there a show or an exhibit coming to a museum or gallery near you that your spouse or coworker might enjoy?

You can also help your friends and family members by suggesting these kinds of experiences as gifts. Doing something together to celebrate your birthday creates a memory that lasts. It gives you new stories to share and gets you out of your routine to add a little freshness to your life.

Celebrate with Experiences Any Day
Giving experiences doesn't have to be expensive. You can bring them muffins, take a picnic lunch somewhere fun. Pick up smoothies and walk at a local park. Invite someone for coffee or for a meal. Spending time together and getting away from daily distractions allows you a chance to connect to the people who matter most to you. You don't even have to wait for a special day to celebrate. You can give this happiness-boosting gift any day!

So this year, as the people around you celebrate milestones, keep experiences close in mind. Look for opportunities to share them with the people you appreciate to show how much you care by giving them a lasting gift of happiness.

Get More Tips and Information on Improving Your Happiness
Learn more about how experiences impact happiness in Day 16: Money: Buy Experiences, Not Things, in my book, 21 Days to Happiness . Get Your Copy of 21 Days to Happiness Now

Are you happy and inspired at work?
If you spend eight hours a day, five days a week at work, you will spend more than 2,000 hours on the job in a year. That's a lot of time! If you enjoy your job, then 2,000 hours probably flies by. But if you struggle to find happiness in your work life, it can seem like an eternity.

So how do you find ways to make work a source of happiness? It's not an impossible question! There are lots of ways to bring happiness into your workday. Here are five questions to ask yourself about your job which will help you uncover sources of happiness beyond that paycheck hitting your bank account.

1. What parts of your company or job inspire you?
Inspiration comes in lots of forms. Maybe something inspired you to apply for this particular job, like being able to help others. Maybe it appealed to your sense of creativity. Maybe you felt a connection with the business mission statement or your employer or coworkers. Take a moment to think about what drew you to this particular job or workplace.

2. Are there problems at work you can participate in solving?
There's no perfect company or perfect set of coworkers or customers out there. Every job will have its challenges. What things bother you? What can you do about them to work toward a positive solution that helps everyone around you? It could be something small, like adding a potted plant to your work area to brighten things up. Or something larger, like meeting with your manager or team to discuss changing a policy which is making your job difficult. Be sure to offer solutions rather than just airing complaints.

3. Can you bring creativity into your job in some way?
Maybe you can bring in a few pictures (or update those you have) to remind you of the people you care about. Take a step back from the way you normally do things at work. Is there a new approach you can take which might freshen up the way you complete your job? It doesn't have to be huge. Don't be afraid to think outside the box or bounce ideas off a coworker.

4. Where do you want this job to take you?
Think about your goals for the next year or five years. Can you see this job as one piece in a larger puzzle of your life? Sometimes taking that step back to consider the bigger picture helps put things in perspective for us. Not only is work just one part of our lives, a job is also one part of our work career. You may picture yourself staying at the same job for the rest of your work life. Many people will change jobs several times through the course of their careers. Thinking of this job as a part of your larger goals can help give you renewed energy and a feeling of freedom at work.

5. Is this the right job for me?
If you've answered all the questions above, and you're really not able to find peace or happiness in your current work life, it may be time to consider a change. Maybe this means moving to a different project or department within the company you work for. It could mean taking some online classes or getting a new certification to add to your arsenal of skills on the job. Maybe it means taking an online career planning test to find out what you should look for. Then, polishing up your resumé and looking for your next workplace adventure.

Whatever the case, with a little effort and some self-examination, finding happiness at work is entirely possible. Making those 40 hours each week contribute to your happiness rather than draining it will significantly change your overall energy level and your ability to enjoy other parts of your life.

Still have questions about how to improve your workplace happiness?
If you have more questions about workplace happiness, I can help you answer them. Take an online career planning test or order a copy of my book, 21 Days to Happiness today. Day 20 focuses on how to find happiness at work. ​You'll find tips and other resources to help you on your journey toward greater happiness. Buy 21 Days to Happiness today

Start Your New Year Off Right with this simple technique

Happy New Year! This is the perfect time of the year to start new habits for healthier, happier living. It's also a busy time of year. Being busy can add extra pressure to our schedules and mean that we need to be extra productive. With so many things on our minds, it can be tricky to focus on one task at a time, and we can end up hopping from one task to another to another without actually completing much. Does any of this sound familiar? If so, you're not alone, and I'm here to help.

Making a few simple changes to how you approach your work periods can really impact your productivity. One of the most effective changes is to work in short, focused bursts. Take quick breaks in between work sessions to let your mind relax. A great model for this type of work-break time management is the Pomodoro Method.

Here's how it works:

Work for 25 minutes. Take a short break of 5 minutes. Repeat this for three rounds. On the fourth round, work for 25 minutes and then take a longer break of 15-30 minutes.

You can use a timer to set intervals yourself. You can also do a quick search on YouTube or wherever you download apps to find either a video with Pomodoro intervals marked or an app to manage the intervals for you.

The goal is to have short but uninterrupted time spent on specific tasks. Try making a list of your goals before you begin to help narrow your focus. You may find you get more done in a 25 minute Pomodoro session than you did in an hour working another way. Give it a try! See how it works for you.

More on the Link Between Time and Happiness

You can learn more about time management and the connection between time and happiness in my book, 21 Days to Happiness. Learn more about 21 Days to Happiness

We have so much to be grateful for.
It's that time of year...the holidays, the parties, the excitement! You probably have a lot to be grateful for and may take some things for granted. You don't need much in order to be happy. Many people without a lot still find real happiness in their daily lives.

Have an Attitude of Gratitude
What you do need in order to be happy is to cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Take a moment to reflect on the past year and make a list of 10 things you have to be grateful for. Note the things you tend to overlook. Think of what you do have instead of what you don't: health, family, work, home, friends...

Focusing on these blessings will foster an attitude of gratitude in your life. And that attitude is like fertile soil where happiness will grow and flourish. Develop a habit of noticing good things and expressing your gratitude for them. Try it for 21 days. You will see a difference in your overall happiness and contentment. Ready to start your happiness journey?
"Day one" of my book, 21 Days to Happiness focuses on gratitude, and offers additional tips and strategies for greater happiness through gratitude. Each day of the 21 day journey takes you through another area of life where you can make simple, practical changes for greater happiness. I'd love to see you start your journey today! Start Your Happiness Journey Today

We have so much to be grateful for.
It's that time of year...the holidays, the parties, the excitement! You probably have a lot to be grateful for and may take some things for granted. You don't need much in order to be happy. Many people without a lot still find real happiness in their daily lives.

Have an Attitude of Gratitude
What you do need in order to be happy is to cultivate an attitude of gratitude. Take a moment to reflect on the past year and make a list of 10 things you have to be grateful for. Note the things you tend to overlook. Think of what you do have instead of what you don't: health, family, work, home, friends...

Focusing on these blessings will foster an attitude of gratitude in your life. And that attitude is like fertile soil where happiness will grow and flourish. Develop a habit of noticing good things and expressing your gratitude for them. Try it for 21 days. You will see a difference in your overall happiness and contentment. Ready to start your happiness journey?
"Day one" of my book, 21 Days to Happiness focuses on gratitude, and offers additional tips and strategies for greater happiness through gratitude. Each day of the 21 day journey takes you through another area of life where you can make simple, practical changes for greater happiness. I'd love to see you start your journey today! Start Your Happiness Journey Today

 It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year - to Work on Your Happiness!

This is the best time of the year to work on your happiness. It's almost Thanksgiving in the United States and just a few short weeks until Christmas. Taking a few minutes now to center yourself and focus on your happiness can help you have the best holiday season.

Very soon I'll be launching my new 21 Days to Happiness E-Learning. I'm so excited to share it with you! The e-learning will share all the practical, effective happiness habits and resources I've put in my book, but in a fresh, interactive format. You're going to love it!

To help start our holidays off right, I'm offering a three-day Happiness Challenge. Each day, I'll ask you to do one task that's guaranteed to help boost your happiness. And, if you participate along with me, you can enter for a chance to win 3 modules from my new 21 Days to Happiness E-Learning.

So let's do it! Follow the tour and earn entries for a chance to win 3 modules of the brand new 21 Days to Happiness interactive e-learning. Here's how:
Follow the Challenge

11/19 - Happiness Challenge Day 1: Smiling with A Mama's Corner of the World
11/20 - Happiness Challenge Day 2: Go Outside with Everyday Gyaan
11/21 - Happiness Challenge Day 3: Gratitude - The Story Sanctuary

Spread the happiness and challenge your friends to participate with you! Notice a boost in your happiness? Great! You can learn more about habits for greater happiness, energy and productivity in my book, 21 Days to Happiness , which is now available in four formats - e-book, paperback, audiobook, and e-learning.