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Stephen  Snyder

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Stephen Snyder

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Born
Baltimore, MD, The United States
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November 2017


I'm a sex and relationship therapist on the faculty of the Mt Sinai School of Medicine, a frequent guest on major media, and a regular contributor to HuffPo + PsychologyToday. My first book Love Worth Making launched Feb 2018 from St Martin's Press https://buff.ly/2sVVUgU

Why is this book different from every other sex book? Simple: It throws out nearly everything but the stories. After 30 years as a sex therapist, you can bet I know some good ones.

We've had outrageous press https://www.sexualityresource.com/press/ and a glowing review from women's health guru + NYTimes bestselling author Dr Christiane Northrup, who wrote, "Hands down the most practical, fun, and empowering book I’ve ever read on how to have a fabulous sex life in a committe
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Stephen Snyder Most people never have a chance to really express what they think and feel. You're the rare exception. Never take that for granted. …moreMost people never have a chance to really express what they think and feel. You're the rare exception. Never take that for granted. (less)
Stephen Snyder Spend time on twitter. Twitter is great practice for choosing just the right word, and for expressing something without excess words.
Read good spor…more
Spend time on twitter. Twitter is great practice for choosing just the right word, and for expressing something without excess words.
Read good sports writing. English is a verb-rich language, and verbs are the heart of good English writing. Sports writers tend to be verb-masters.
Put your writing on Google Drive, so you can polish it while waiting in lines, etc. Just pull out your phone and start asking, "How can I make this better?"
Read books on writing dialogue. My favorite is "How to Write Dazzling Dialogue," by James Scott Bell. (less)
Average rating: 4.16 · 1,235 ratings · 115 reviews · 1 distinct workSimilar authors
Love Worth Making: How to H...

4.15 avg rating — 1,305 ratings — published 2018 — 6 editions
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10 Things To Consider If Your Man Can’t Ejaculate During Sex

"I think there's something wrong with him – or with me. We'll have sex for thirty minutes and he still can't come. I can't help thinking he's just not that attracted to me anymore."

If you're a woman reading this article, chances are you've had some version of this thought. You're watching the man you love struggle to reach orgasm during sex, and despite his reassurances, you can't shake the fe

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Published on September 05, 2025 09:08

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10 Things To Consider If Your Man Can’t Ejaculate During Sex


"I think there's something wrong with him – or with me. We'll have sex for thirty minutes and he still can't come. I can't help thinking he's just no Read more of this blog post »
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Quotes by Stephen Snyder  (?)
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“The main reason a man needs to get hard is so he won’t have to worry about getting hard. Having an erection is no guarantee that he’ll enjoy himself. But if he doesn’t have one, there’s not much chance he’ll remember the experience fondly.”
Stephen Snyder, Love Worth Making: How to Have Ridiculously Great Sex in a Long-Lasting Relationship

“She also needs to know that her body is giving you pleasure.”
Stephen Snyder, Love Worth Making: How to Have Ridiculously Great Sex in a Long-Lasting Relationship

“But it feels so terrible to lose arousal like that.” No, I think to myself. Loss of arousal doesn’t by itself feel terrible. Frustrating, certainly. Disappointing, without question. But “terrible” is one of those over-the-top words that to a therapist signals we’re dealing with something else.”
Stephen Snyder, Love Worth Making: How to Have Ridiculously Great Sex in a Long-Lasting Relationship

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“This is not a conventional “how-to” book. It contains no exercises, and it has few formulas saying “first do this, then do that.”
This is intentional. As we’ll see later, eros doesn’t like to be told what to do. If you set a goal, your sexual mind will be happy to reject it. It’s kind of childish and brilliant that way.
You also won’t find much about sexual biology or neurochemistry on these pages. Sex books these days tend to be full of advice for “boosting your dopamine”—or your oxytocin, or some other such nonsense. In all my 30 years as a sex therapist, I’ve yet to see a dopamine molecule walk into my office. We’ll stick with things you can see and feel yourself, without needing a laboratory.
I’ll also spare you the body diagrams. You already know what a penis and vagina look like, right? And we won’t discuss how many neurons are concentrated in your clitoris. It’s an impressive number, but who really cares?
There are a few great sex books already out there, and I’ll point them out to you as we go along. But reading most of the others is like gnawing on dry bones. As my friend and colleague Paul Joannides, the author of Guide to Getting it On (one of the aforementioned great ones), has accurately noted, “the trouble with most books on sex is they don’t get anyone hard or wet.”
This book is not intended to get you hard or wet. But it’s meant not to get in your way either. The chapters are short, so you can read them even if you get a little distracted. Hey, I hope you get a little distracted.
There are no lists to memorize, and there won’t be a test afterwards. We’re dealing with a part of the human mind that hasn’t gone to school yet, and never will.
Any questions?
OK, let’s get started . . .

Adapted from LOVE WORTH MAKING by Stephen Snyder, M.D. Copyright © 2018 by the author and reprinted with permission of St. Martin’s Press, LLC.”
Stephen Snyder MD

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