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Brian Phares

Goodreads Author


Born
in Rochester, New York, The United States
Twitter

Genre

Influences
John Green, Tina Fey, John Irving, Adam McKay, Stephen King

Member Since
June 2012


Brian was born in Rochester, New York, in 1981, and by his own account, spent the next several years as a baby. He was a completely average human child, and no one should have any reason to think otherwise. Brian studied English and Creative Writing at The State University of New York at Oswego before earning an MFA in Creative Writing from Lesley University in Boston. Brian has worked in a grocery store, a restaurant, a hardware store, a mall shoe store, and a high school. Eventually he’ll write about all of those jobs.

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Brian Phares I find the ingredient labels on boxes of Cheez-Its to be intensely erotic. Also the screenplay for the movie "A League of Their Own."…moreI find the ingredient labels on boxes of Cheez-Its to be intensely erotic. Also the screenplay for the movie "A League of Their Own."(less)
Brian Phares On the log flume at Seabreeze. She was the lifeguard posted at the top of the hill and as I went by I noticed she was reading a paperback wrapped in a…moreOn the log flume at Seabreeze. She was the lifeguard posted at the top of the hill and as I went by I noticed she was reading a paperback wrapped in a ziploc bag to keep it dry. I was captivated so I kept riding around and around asking her one question each time I crested the hill. By my 50th ride we were married.(less)
Average rating: 4.23 · 13 ratings · 4 reviews · 1 distinct work
Eighty-Sixed

4.23 avg rating — 13 ratings2 editions
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The Revenant
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The Revenant by Michael Punke
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Razorblade Tears by S.A. Cosby
Razorblade Tears
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Lincoln in the Bardo by George Saunders
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Lincoln in the Bardo by George Saunders
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A Children's Bible by Lydia Millet
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Hard Rain Falling by Don Carpenter
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Martyr! by Kaveh Akbar
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East of Eden by John Steinbeck
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Martyr! by Kaveh Akbar
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More of Brian's books…
“The show doesn’t go on because it’s ready; it goes on because it’s 11:30.”
Lorne Michaels

“The show doesn’t go on because it’s ready; it goes on because it’s 11:30.

This is something Lorne [Michaels] has said often about Saturday Night Live, but I think it’s a great lesson about not being too precious about your writing. You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke you can until the last possible second, and then you have to let it go.

You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute. (And I’m from a generation where a lot of people died on waterslides, so this was an important lesson for me to learn.) You have to let people see what you wrote. It will never be perfect, but perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring on live TV.

What I learned about ‘bombing’ as an improviser at Second City was that bombing is painful, but it doesn’t kill you. No matter how badly an improv set goes, you will still be physically alive when it’s over. What I learned about bombing as a writer at Saturday Night is that you can’t be too worried about your ‘permanent record.’ Yes, you’re going to write some sketches that you love and are proud of forever—your golden nuggets. But you’re also going to write some real shit nuggets. And unfortunately, sometimes the shit nuggets will make it onto the air. You can’t worry about it. As long as you know the difference, you can go back to panning for gold on Monday.”
Tina Fey, Bossypants

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