Arvind Devalia's Blog
July 29, 2026
What Does It Really Mean to Say “I Choose You”?
The happy wedded couple (Photo Credit: Anjli Majevadia)
I choose you—and I keep choosing you.Last Sunday, I attended the wedding of my first cousin Suraj.
He stood beside Aayushi, the woman he loves, surrounded by family and friends as they made one of the biggest promises of their lives. There were happy tears, colourful outfits, music, dancing and, as you would expect at an Indian wedding, an abundance of wonderful food.
The Friday before the wedding, both families came together for a joint celebration. The room was full of colour and energy, the music was irresistible and every generation found its way onto the dance floor.
Indian weddings have a magnificence all their own, but their real beauty lies in how they bring people together. They do not simply celebrate two individuals. They celebrate families, friendships, traditions, generations and the sheer joy of human connection.
The gift of a weddingOne part of the ceremony touched me particularly deeply.
Towards the end of a traditional Hindu wedding, the bride and groom bow before their parents and elders to pay their respects and receive their blessings. It is a beautiful reminder that marriage is not only about two people, but also about the generations who came before them and the community that surrounds them.
Watching Suraj and Aayushi took me back to my own wedding day.
After touching my father’s feet and receiving his blessing, I stood up and embraced him. My dad was never particularly comfortable with hugs, especially in public, but on that auspicious day he allowed himself to be held.
My eyes filled with tears in that precious moment.
Almost twenty years after losing him, that brief embrace remains one of my most treasured memories of my late father.
Sometimes we do not realise we are living a memory until years later.
Perhaps that is one of the great gifts of a wedding. It does not simply celebrate the relationship of the couple standing before us; it invites every person present to reflect on how they are loving the people already in their lives.
Three couples, one declarationSuraj and Aayushi’s wedding was not the only marriage I had been thinking about.
A couple of weeks earlier, on a Saturday morning, I met a young man called Vasyl on the train. As often happens, we began chatting, and he told me he was travelling to marry his fiancée, Oksana, later that day.
Vasyl and Oksana on their wedding morning
Naturally, he was excited, but what struck me most was his calmness. There was a quiet certainty about him, as though he understood that he was travelling not only towards a ceremony, but towards an entirely new chapter of his life.
The previous evening, while watching Wimbledon on a big screen in Portman Square, I had met another lovely couple, Peter and Mariame. We enjoyed an immediate connection, and they told me that they too would be getting married two weeks later—the same weekend as Suraj and Aayushi.
Three couples, each with a different story, but all making the same extraordinary declaration:
I choose you.
It made me wonder why marriage still matters—and how it fits into my ethos of The Connection Revolution.
Many couples today build loving and meaningful lives together without ever marrying. They share homes, responsibilities, children and dreams, and their love is no less genuine because they have not held a wedding.
So what continues to draw people towards marriage?
The more I reflect on it, the more I believe marriage is less about a legal contract and more about making an intention visible:
My life is no longer only about me. I am choosing to build something with you.
A wedding lasts a dayA wedding lasts just a day, but a marriage is created over thousands of ordinary days.
It is built through conversations, disappointments and celebrations. It grows during the moments when two people choose kindness over ego, curiosity over judgement and understanding over the need to be right.
The wedding day may contain the beautiful outfits, music, dancing and photographs, but the real relationship is built afterwards—over breakfast, during long journeys, through difficult seasons and within the conversations that would sometimes be easier to avoid.
Thinking about this inevitably led me back to my own marriage.
At the time, I hoped it would last for the rest of our lives, and when it ended, I wished the story had turned out differently.
Yet time has a remarkable way of changing our perspective.
Looking back now, I can honestly say that I became a better human being through everything I experienced as a result of my marriage ending. I learnt to become more vulnerable, patient and present; to listen rather than immediately search for an answer; and to care less about being right and more about understanding another person’s experience.
When I think about the husband I was then, I have to smile and, if I am honest, cringe a little too.
From Mr Fix It to Mr PresentI was very much Mr Fix It.
Whenever someone I loved had a problem, my instinct was to solve it. I believed that offering advice and solutions was how I showed that I cared. And it had to be my way or the highway!
I sometimes joke that I was less of an equal partner and more of a dictator. I am exaggerating to make the point, but perhaps not by as much as I would like to imagine.
Only later did I understand that people do not always want to be fixed. Often, they simply want to know that we are with them, that we have heard them and that their feelings matter.
Sometimes the most loving thing we can offer another human being is not an answer, but our presence—the willingness to listen with our full attention and without immediately steering the conversation towards a solution.
These days, I would much rather be Mr Present than Mr Fix It.
(Photo credit: Hersh Patel)
Do couples really grow apart?People often say that couples “grow apart”, but I am no longer sure that is quite what happens.
Perhaps people simply continue to grow, but in different ways or towards different horizons. Their priorities shift, the dreams they once shared evolve, and the vision that once united them may gradually become less clear.
One can love someone deeply and yet no longer be in love with them—but perhaps that is a conversation for another article.
What matters, I believe, is that two people keep returning to the life they are creating together.
Who are we becoming?
What kind of life and home do we want to create?
And what difference might we make together that neither of us could make alone?
A shared vision does not mean agreeing on everything or following an unchanging plan. Life will surprise us. People evolve, circumstances change and the future rarely unfolds exactly as expected.
But there is something powerful about continuing to face the same general direction while giving each other the freedom and encouragement to grow as individuals.
Perhaps that is one of the deeper purposes of marriage. It is not simply about finding happiness together, but about creating something together: a loving home, a family, a business, a body of work, a contribution to the community or simply a way of living that brings more kindness into the world.
Becoming the right personFor years, people have asked me whether I believe in soulmates.
I still love the romance of the idea, but over time I have come to believe something even more hopeful.
Rather than spending our lives searching endlessly for the “right person”, perhaps we should devote more energy to becoming the right person.
The strongest relationships are not discovered fully formed. They are created through honesty, curiosity, forgiveness, shared values and countless small acts of care.
They endure not because two people remain exactly as they were when they first met, but because they keep discovering one another—staying curious about who the other person is becoming while allowing themselves to grow too.
Perhaps a soulmate is not someone perfectly designed to complete us, but someone with whom we consciously create a soulmate relationship—someone who sees us clearly, challenges us lovingly and inspires us to become more fully ourselves.
I choose you—and I keep choosing youMy hope for Suraj and Aayushi—and for Vasyl and Oksana, and for Peter and Mariame—is not simply that they enjoy many happy years together.
I hope they continue growing towards the same horizon while allowing one another to flourish. I hope they create something together that neither could have created alone, and that their relationship becomes a source of love, strength and encouragement for everyone fortunate enough to know them.
Above all, my wish for them is simple:
Always be there for one another and truly, truly be present. Listen with curiosity. Resist the temptation to fix when what is really needed is understanding. Keep choosing one another, especially on the ordinary days when there is no music, no dancing and no crowd gathered to witness your love.
To me, this is where The Connection Revolution begins—not in grand declarations, but in our closest relationships: in how fully we listen, how generously we allow one another to change and how often we choose presence over ego.
Because the wedding day is only the first declaration.
The deeper promise is made quietly, again and again, in all the days that follow.
And perhaps, in the end, that is what love has been asking of us all along.
The post What Does It Really Mean to Say “I Choose You”? appeared first on Arvind Devalia.
July 19, 2026
Why Every Great Legacy Begins With a Conversation
One of the things I love most about living in London is that you never quite know what the day has in store.
Yesterday was a perfect example.
I was in central London at the National Gallery for lunch with my friend Peter, who was celebrating a special birthday.
There were twelve of us gathered around the table, and it was one of those wonderfully relaxed afternoons where conversation flowed easily, stories were shared, old friendships were celebrated and new friendships began.
Afterwards, we wandered over to the West End to see the matinee performance of Mamma Mia!. It was joyful, uplifting and exactly the sort of show that leaves you walking out into the sunshine with a smile on your face.
As I made my way through Trafalgar Square afterwards, I could hear music drifting across the square. Curious, I wandered over to see what was happening and, quite unexpectedly, found myself in the middle of London’s celebration of Nelson Mandela Day.
The square was alive with music, dancing and laughter. Families had gathered, children were waving flags and people from across the African diaspora had come together to celebrate the life of a man whose influence continues to reach every corner of the world.
I hadn’t planned to stay for very long, but there was something about the atmosphere that invited me to slow down and simply enjoy being there.
I’m so glad I did.
Within minutes I found myself chatting to people from South Africa and also someone from Kenya, the country of my birth.
It was a joy to reconnect with my African roots.
We spoke about Mandela, our memories of Africa and what his life still means to us today. As so often happens, strangers quickly became friends through nothing more complicated than a genuine conversation.
Standing there brought back another memory.
In February 2005, I stood in that very same square listening to Nelson Mandela speak during the Make Poverty History campaign.
I was there with my dear friend Resli and it was such a moving experience to hear Madiba speak in person.
More than twenty years have passed, yet I can still remember the extraordinary sense of hope he created. He didn’t simply inspire people. He started conversations—between races, between neighbours, between former enemies and, ultimately, between a nation and its future. He reminded us that our shared humanity will always be greater than the things that divide us.
Yesterday also reminded me of another visit that has stayed with me over the years.
Almost 25 years ago in August 2001, during a business trip to South Africa, I visited Nelson Mandela’s modest home in Soweto.
What struck me wasn’t its size but its simplicity. Walking through those rooms, I was reminded that greatness has very little to do with wealth, status or possessions. Instead, it grows out of the values we choose to live by—our courage, our humility and, perhaps most of all, our willingness to forgive.
Those thoughts stayed with me yesterday as I made my way home, and they blended with another conversation I’d had just the day before.
I’d popped into my local pharmacy and got chatting to the pharmacist, who told me she was originally from Ukraine.
I asked whether she still had family there, and she quietly explained that although her mother had managed to come to Britain in March 2022, her brother had stayed behind.
What stayed with me wasn’t the detail of the conversation.
It was the sadness and concern in her voice as she spoke about her mother’s constant worry.
As I walked home, I found myself thinking not only about that family but about mothers everywhere who are lying awake at night worrying about sons and daughters caught up in war.
Behind every headline is a family.
Behind every conflict are ordinary people who simply want to live in peace.
It made me wonder what any one of us can really do in a world that sometimes feels so divided.
Most of us will never negotiate peace treaties or address the United Nations. But every one of us has the opportunity to bring a little more peace into the lives of the people we meet.
We can choose kindness over judgement, curiosity over assumptions and listening over arguing. We can smile at a stranger, reach out to an old friend, volunteer in our community or simply take the time to hear another person’s story.
As I reflected on the day, something struck me. Almost every meaningful moment had begun with a conversation.
Peter’s birthday had brought twelve people together around a table.
A few words exchanged in Trafalgar Square reconnected me with my African roots.
A simple question to my pharmacist opened a window into the human cost of war.
None of those conversations changed the world overnight, but each one changed the people involved, if only a little. And perhaps that’s how every great legacy begins—not with grand speeches or historic moments, but with one person choosing to reach out to another.
Perhaps that’s why Nelson Mandela’s legacy still matters so much today.
He understood that leadership isn’t really about power.
It’s about service.
It’s about bringing people together.
It’s about helping others believe in something bigger than themselves.
Every year, Nelson Mandela Day encourages people around the world to spend 67 minutes serving others, representing the 67 years he devoted to justice, equality and human dignity.
I love the simplicity of that invitation. Not because 67 minutes will change the world overnight, but because every act of service changes something within us.
It reminds us that leadership isn’t reserved for politicians, CEOs or people standing on stages.
Leadership is how we choose to show up every single day.
It’s found in our kindness, our courage, our willingness to listen and our determination to leave the people we meet feeling just a little more hopeful than before.
Perhaps that’s why Nelson Mandela continues to inspire us all.
He didn’t simply change a nation.
He changed the way millions of people think about what it means to lead.
And that’s a legacy worth aspiring to.
Many people believe Nelson Mandela spoke the following words at his inauguration. In fact, they were written by Marianne Williamson in her wonderful book A Return to Love. Whether Mandela ever quoted them or not, I think they beautifully capture the spirit of the man.
“As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we’re liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
As I reflected on yesterday, I found myself asking three simple questions.
I’d love to leave them with you today.
How will you let your light shine from today?
What lessons from Nelson Mandela’s life will you carry into your own?
What legacy do you hope you’ll leave behind?
Those aren’t questions to answer just once.
They’re questions to return to throughout our lives.
Because our legacy isn’t created in one defining moment. It’s created in thousands of ordinary moments through the choices we make, the people we encourage and the way we leave others feeling after they’ve spent time with us.
That, to me, is what The Connection Revolution is all about.
Every great legacy begins with a conversation.
Perhaps yours will too.
A Personal InvitationIf this post has prompted you to reflect on your own leadership, relationships and the legacy you’re creating, I’d love to invite you to take my Inner Transformation Scorecard
It only takes a few minutes to complete, and you’ll receive a personalised report exploring eight key areas of your life—from purpose and resilience to relationships, wellbeing and self-connection.
My hope is that it helps you become more intentional about the life you’re creating and the legacy you’re leaving behind. After all, every great leader starts by leading themselves.
[Take the Inner Transformation Scorecard]
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts, so do message me and let me know what resonated most with you.
Have a beautiful day!
The post Why Every Great Legacy Begins With a Conversation appeared first on Arvind Devalia.
July 15, 2026
What Six Gatherings Across London Taught Me About Human Connection
Last weekend, I found myself in six very different gatherings across London.
On Friday afternoon, I joined hundreds of people watching the Wimbledon men’s semi-final on a giant outdoor screen in central London. Complete strangers, all absorbed in the same drama, applauding the same moments and willing the players on together.
Later that evening, I was on the Strand with a wonderful team of volunteers serving hot food and donating foodstuffs to more than 200 people experiencing homelessness or difficult circumstances. The conversations were just as nourishing as the meals.
Saturday began with one of the most peaceful experiences I’ve had in years. I walked from the London Eye through central London alongside Buddhist monks, nuns and followers before we gathered next to the beautiful Peace Pagoda in Battersea Park for a picnic.
Earlier that morning on the train, I struck up a conversation with a man on his way to get married. I wished him well and thought nothing more of it until, by one of those delightful twists of fate that life occasionally offers, I bumped into him again a couple of hours later, this time standing proudly beside his bride Oksana.
Later that afternoon, I joined a Dating Picnic in Regent’s Park where complete strangers came together with open hearts and quiet hope.
By the evening, thousands of England supporters were sharing every emotion imaginable as their World Cup quarter-final match against Norway stretched into 120+ unforgettable minutes before England finally prevailed.
Then, on Sunday afternoon, I spent time at my local synagogue as a volunteer, helping welcome people seeking asylum as they begin building new lives in this country.
At first, these experiences felt like nothing more than a wonderfully full weekend.
Then I realised they were all expressions of the same deeply human need.
Not success.
Not status.
Not even happiness.
The need to belong.
—
The more I reflected, the more I realised that beneath all our differences, we are each searching for three simple things.
To be seen.
To belong.
To know that we matter.
The people receiving food on the Strand weren’t only grateful for a warm meal and some foodstuffs. They were grateful that somebody had stopped, smiled and recognised their humanity.
The monks weren’t trying to change the world through loud slogans. Their quiet presence reminded me that peace begins long before international negotiations.
Peace begins with each of us.
The newlyweds were celebrating more than a wedding. They were making a promise that neither of them has to face life alone. And they were publicly declaring their commitment to each other.
The people at the Dating Picnic weren’t simply looking for romance. They were looking for companionship, understanding, acceptance and hope.
The World Cup football crowd wasn’t united by politics, religion or background. For two unforgettable hours, complete strangers became a community.
And the people seeking asylum weren’t only looking for practical support. Like every one of us, they were looking for dignity, welcome and the chance to belong.
Different stories.
One shared longing.
Belonging.
—
It’s striking that all of this happened during a week when so much of the public conversation centred on AI companions and the growing loneliness epidemic.
I find those conversations fascinating. AI is becoming an increasingly valuable part of my own work and daily life.
But this weekend reminded me of something technology can never replace.
Technology can introduce us.
It can help us communicate.
It can even help us understand one another.
But it cannot recreate the warmth of sharing a meal, the joy of celebrating with strangers or the quiet reassurance that comes from knowing you’re welcome.
Loneliness isn’t simply the absence of conversation.
It’s the absence of belonging.
—
Looking back, I realised this wasn’t simply a busy weekend.
It was a rich one.
Rich in conversations.
Rich in unexpected encounters.
Rich in opportunities to serve.
Rich in moments of celebration.
Rich in reminders that the best things in life are still found in the company of other people.
And perhaps that’s what I’ve been trying to build, consciously or unconsciously, for many years now.
Not a busy life.
A connected one.
Because a connected life doesn’t happen by accident.
We create it.
One invitation.
One act of service.
One conversation.
One gathering at a time.
—
As I reflected on the weekend, I found myself asking a few simple questions.
When was the last time I truly felt that I belonged?
Who haven’t I invited for a coffee because life has simply become too busy?
Who around me might be quietly hoping that someone reaches out?
Perhaps they’re questions worth asking ourselves this week.
When was the last time you felt completely seen?
Who could you invite for a walk, a coffee or lunch?
Where have you been pursuing more success when what you’re really longing for is deeper connection?
Sometimes the breakthrough we’re searching for isn’t another achievement.
Sometimes it’s another human being.
—
How Connected Is Your Life… Really?These are exactly the kinds of questions that inspired me to create my Inner Transformation Scorecard.
In just five minutes, you’ll reflect on eight key areas of your life, including purpose, relationships, wellbeing, resilience and connection. At the end, you’ll receive a personalised report highlighting your strengths and the areas where you have the greatest opportunity for growth.
If this week’s newsletter has prompted you to pause and reflect, I think you’ll find the Scorecard a valuable next step.
👉 [Take the Inner Transformation Scorecard]
One thing I’ve learnt over the years is that the people who eventually come to me for coaching rarely need another strategy.
Most already know what they should be doing.
Outwardly, life often looks successful.
Yet something feels out of alignment.
They’re longing for greater clarity.
More meaningful relationships.
A stronger sense of purpose.
Or simply the feeling that life has become disconnected from what matters most.
If your Scorecard results raise questions you’d like to explore further, I’d be delighted to have a conversation.
Because after one extraordinary weekend across London, I’m reminded once again that the greatest gift we can offer another person isn’t advice.
It’s helping them feel that they belong.
Go well. Stay connected. And remember…
You can’t outsource human connection.
Ready to discover where you are on your own journey?
👉 [Take the Inner Transformation Scorecard]
The post What Six Gatherings Across London Taught Me About Human Connection appeared first on Arvind Devalia.
July 6, 2026
The Most Powerful Gift You Can Give Someone Today
Last weekend I found myself in two very different places.
One was Greenwich Park.
The other was London’s Pride celebration.
At first glance, they couldn’t have been more different.
One was peaceful and spacious, with families picnicking, runners enjoying the sunshine and people simply slowing down for a few hours.
The other was vibrant, colourful and full of music, laughter and celebration.
Yet as I travelled home that evening, I realised they’d both taught me exactly the same lesson.
It started in Greenwich Park.
I was wearing my bright orange London Marathon finisher’s T-shirt from 2021.
If you’ve ever seen it, you’ll know it’s almost impossible to miss.
Within minutes, someone smiled and asked,
“Did you run London in 2021?”
I had.
“So did I,” he replied.
We chatted about the race, the atmosphere, the training and what keeps us coming back for those unforgettable 26.2 miles.
A little later, someone else stopped me.
He’d also run the marathon that year.
When I mentioned I’d now completed the London Marathon twelve times, his eyes lit up. It turned out he hosts a podcast for runners and endurance athletes, and before we went our separate ways he’d invited me to be a guest.
Two complete strangers.
Two lovely conversations.
One unexpected opportunity.
All because of a bright orange T-shirt.
Later that afternoon I joined the Pride celebrations in central London.
The atmosphere was incredible.
Thousands of people from every imaginable background coming together to celebrate, support one another and simply enjoy being themselves.
Among all the banners and placards, one T-shirt made me stop.
It read:
“Why be racist, sexist, homophobic or transphobic when you could just be quiet?”
Whether you agree with every word isn’t really the point.
It made people stop.
It made people think.
It certainly made me think.
As I wandered through the crowds, I realised that my favourite moments from the day weren’t really about a marathon or a parade.
They were about something much deeper.
Both began because somebody noticed somebody else.
One person noticed an orange T-shirt and started a conversation.
Another person wore a message that invited people to stop and reflect.
Different settings.
Different people.
The same human instinct.
Connection begins when we notice one another.
On my way home, I walked down Edgware Road, not far from where I live.
The pavements were packed with Moroccan football fans celebrating their team’s extraordinary victory and their place in the World Cup quarter-finals.
The atmosphere was joyful, noisy and wonderfully infectious.
More and more cars arrived, horns blaring, flags waving from windows and people spilling onto the pavements. It felt like an impromptu street carnival.
Standing quietly in the middle of it all was a small group of police officers doing their best to keep everyone safe and stop the crowds spilling into the busy road.
I couldn’t help thinking how long their day must have been.
I walked over to a policeman and a policewoman and simply said,
“Thank you for everything you’ve done today. We really appreciate you looking after us.”
Their faces changed instantly.
They smiled.
We chatted for a minute or two before I continued my walk home.
It wasn’t a life-changing conversation.
It won’t make the evening news.
But it reminded me of something I’ve been thinking about ever since celebrating the life of my dear friend Yagi—a remarkable man whose greatest gift was making everyone around him feel welcome, seen and valued. If you missed that reflection, you can read it here.
Perhaps the greatest gift we can offer another human being is simply letting them know they’ve been seen.
During Yagi’s memorial, someone shared the beautiful Sanskrit word Samp.
It means togetherness.
Harmony.
Standing together in heart, thought and action.
As soon as I heard it, I smiled, because that’s exactly what I’ve been trying to describe through The Connection Revolution.
Not networking.
Not collecting contacts.
Not building a bigger following.
Simply creating the kind of human connection where people genuinely feel seen, heard and valued.
After more than twenty years of coaching, I’ve come to believe that this is one of our deepest human needs.
At the heart of it all, I think we want something remarkably simple.
We want to be seen.
Not admired, but understood.
Not merely tolerated, but genuinely accepted.
It’s also why so many successful people quietly struggle.
From the outside, life often looks wonderful. Their careers are flourishing, their businesses are growing and their friends assume everything is going well.
Yet privately they tell me a very different story.
They feel stretched, pulled in too many directions and uncertain about which opportunities to pursue. Life has become busier than ever, yet somehow less fulfilling. They’re constantly looking after their teams, their clients and their families, but somewhere along the way they’ve stopped looking after themselves.
Almost without exception, they don’t need another motivational quote or another productivity hack.
What they need is clarity.
Clarity about what matters most.
The focus to give their best energy to the things that truly deserve it.
And the courage to take meaningful action.
Those three words have become the foundation of my coaching.
Clarity. Focus. Action.
Because once you’re clear, focus becomes easier. Once you’re focused, meaningful action follows naturally.
And perhaps that’s another form of connection.
Reconnecting with yourself.
So let me leave you with one question.
Who in your life needs to feel truly seen?
It might be someone you love.
A colleague.
A neighbour.
The person serving your morning coffee.
Or perhaps…
The person looking back at you in the mirror.
Ready to gain more clarity?Every week I work with successful people who, from the outside, appear to have everything going for them.
They’re bright, capable and respected. Many have built successful businesses or careers, yet privately they know something feels out of alignment.
If that sounds familiar, I’d encourage you to take my Inner Transformation Scorecard.
In just a few minutes you’ll receive a personalised report highlighting where you are today across the areas of life that matter most—from clarity and purpose to relationships, wellbeing and courageous action.
Sometimes one moment of honest reflection changes everything.
And if you’d like to explore your results together, I’d be delighted to arrange an initial conversation.
Because creating a life you love rarely begins with trying harder.
It begins with getting clear.
Finding your focus.
Taking meaningful action.
And perhaps, before any of that…
Simply noticing.
Because maybe The Connection Revolution doesn’t begin by changing the world.
Perhaps it begins by noticing one person.
Today.
Proud couple at Pride London 4th July 2026
The post The Most Powerful Gift You Can Give Someone Today appeared first on Arvind Devalia.
June 28, 2026
You Don’t Have a Motivation Problem. You Have a Clarity Problem.
Yesterday was one of the happiest memorials I’ve ever attended.
That probably sounds like a contradiction.
Surely memorials are supposed to be sombre, quiet and full of sadness?
Not this one.
Around two hundred of us came together to celebrate the life of my dear friend Yagi, who passed away a year ago.
We played cricket.
Football.
Rounders.
There were games for the children, delicious food, prayers, music, hugs and, above all, laughter.
Lots of laughter and joy.
As I looked around, I realised something.
One man’s life had brought together hundreds of people… even after he had gone.
That’s quite extraordinary.
Yagi had a remarkable gift for making everyone feel welcome, included and valued. You always felt better after spending time with him.
His family, friends and colleagues at IBM have adopted a beautiful phrase:
#BeMoreYagi
I haven’t stopped thinking about those three words.
Because perhaps that’s all any of us can really hope for.
Not that people remember what we achieved.
But that they remember how we made them feel.
During the celebration, one of the speakers talked about the Sanskrit word Samp.
It means togetherness, harmony and unity. Standing together as one in heart, thought and action.
As soon as I heard it, I smiled.
Because I realised that Samp is exactly what I’ve been trying to describe through The Connection Revolution.
Not networking.
Not collecting contacts.
Not having thousands of followers.
But creating the kind of human connection where people genuinely feel seen, heard and valued.
Perhaps that’s why yesterday affected me so deeply.
It wasn’t simply a celebration of one remarkable man.
It was a celebration of connection itself.
And it made me ask myself a question.
Not, “What legacy will I leave?”
But something much more immediate.
Am I showing up each day in a way that helps the people around me feel seen, heard and valued?
Because if we can answer yes to that, perhaps everything else starts to fall into place.
—
Here’s something else I’ve noticed after more than twenty years of coaching.
The biggest obstacle isn’t a lack of talent.
It isn’t intelligence.
It isn’t opportunity.
It certainly isn’t age.
The number one thing that stops people creating the life they genuinely want is something much simpler.
They are simply not clear.
Not clear about what they really want.
Not clear about what matters most.
Not clear about which relationship needs attention.
Not clear about which opportunity to pursue.
Not clear about what they need to let go of.
Without clarity, life slowly becomes a series of reactions. We answer emails, attend meetings, scroll social media, pay bills and tick off another to-do list. Weeks become months. Months become years. Somewhere along the way, we wake up wondering why life feels so… flat.
Here’s the uncomfortable truth.
Most people don’t actually have a motivation problem.
They have a clarity problem.
When you become crystal clear, energy follows. Decisions become easier. Confidence grows. Momentum builds.
But clarity on its own isn’t enough.
Because there’s a second obstacle.
Action.
Over the years, I’ve coached countless people who knew exactly what they needed to do. Have the difficult conversation. Leave the draining job. Start the business. Write the book. Repair the relationship. Take better care of themselves.
They knew.
But they waited.
For more confidence.
For more certainty.
For Monday.
For September.
For next year.
For the children to grow up.
For retirement.
For the “right time.”
Here’s the bad news.
The right time rarely arrives.
Life moves anyway.
Yesterday was another reminder of that.
None of us knows how many summers remain.
None of us knows how many conversations remain with the people we love.
None of us knows how many opportunities remain to become the person we know we could be.
That isn’t meant to be depressing.
I actually find it incredibly liberating.
Because if life is precious…
Then today matters.
This week matters.
The conversation you’ve been avoiding matters.
The dream you’ve quietly buried matters.
The person you’re becoming matters.
And perhaps the question isn’t…
“What sort of legacy will I leave?”
Perhaps the better question is…
“Am I living in a way that makes me feel fully alive today?”
Because if you get that right…
The legacy usually takes care of itself.
—
Every week I speak to people who look successful on the outside but feel stuck on the inside.
Almost without exception, they don’t need more information.
They need more clarity.
If this newsletter has struck a chord with you, start by taking my Inner Transformation Scorecard.
👉 [Take the Inner Transformation Scorecard]
It takes just a few minutes, and you’ll receive a personalised report highlighting the areas of your life that may be holding you back.
Because from everything I’ve learned over the past twenty years, a better life doesn’t usually begin with working harder.
It begins with getting clearer.
And then having the courage to take the very next step.
Have a wonderful day.
And this week, in your own way…
Be more Yagi.
“We have two lives, and the second begins when we realise we only have one” – Confucious
The post You Don’t Have a Motivation Problem. You Have a Clarity Problem. appeared first on Arvind Devalia.
June 21, 2026
Three Celebrations, One Powerful Reminder for a Day of Connection
Today is one of those rare days when several meaningful occasions come together.
It’s Father’s Day.
It’s International Yoga Day.
And it’s also the Summer Solstice, the longest day of the year.
Three very different celebrations.
Yet as I reflected on them this morning, I realised they all point towards the same thing.
Connection.
In fact, the word yoga comes from the Sanskrit word Yuj, meaning union or connection.
Connection with ourselves.
Connection with others.
Connection with nature.
Connection with life itself.
Which makes today a rather fitting day for The Connection Revolution.
International Yoga Day holds a special place in my heart because yoga has transformed my own life.
I was properly introduced to yoga through Sadhguru’s teachings in 2009, and what began as a curiosity gradually became something much deeper.
Like many people, I initially thought yoga was mainly about physical health. Flexibility. Strength. Fitness.
Standing on one leg without falling over!
(I still can’t)
All useful things, of course.
But over time I discovered that yoga isn’t really about what happens on the mat.
It’s about what happens within us.
Yoga is about bringing together parts of ourselves that have become disconnected.
Body and mind.
Thought and action.
The outer world and the inner world.
Over the years, yoga has taught me that many of our struggles arise when we become disconnected.
Disconnected from our purpose.
Disconnected from what truly matters.
Disconnected from our own inner wisdom.
My yoga practice taught me how to slow down. How to breathe. How to create enough space to hear myself again.
And that lesson extends far beyond yoga.
The quality of our relationship with ourselves influences every other relationship in our lives.
When we are at peace with ourselves, we tend to be more patient with others.
When we understand ourselves better, we judge others less.
When we feel connected internally, it becomes easier to connect externally.
Which brings me to Father’s Day.
My father was an intelligent, caring and deeply loving man.
Like all parents, he wasn’t perfect. None of us are.
But there is one conversation with him that has stayed with me for years.
It took place during one of the most challenging periods of my life.
I had gone through my divorce and, if I’m honest, I felt lost for quite a while afterwards. I was trying to rebuild my confidence, rediscover my direction and figure out what the next chapter of my life would look like.
One day my father looked at me and said:
“You are so smart and capable. Why are you struggling so much?”
At the time, those words landed heavily.
Part of me felt misunderstood.
When you’re going through a difficult period, the last thing you want is to feel as though you’re somehow failing.
And yet, as the years have passed, I have come to hear those words differently.
What I hear now is not criticism.
I hear concern.
I hear belief.
I hear a father looking at his son and seeing possibilities that his son could not yet see for himself.
Those words have been both a millstone and an inspiration.
A millstone because I sometimes felt I wasn’t living up to the expectations others had of me.
An inspiration because they reminded me that someone who loved me deeply believed I was capable of more than I believed myself.
Perhaps many of us carry words like that from our parents.
Words that challenge us.
Words that encourage us.
Words that stay with us long after they were spoken.
Sadly, my father passed away unexpectedly after what initially appeared to be a relatively minor chest infection.
Like so many families, we assumed there would be more time.
More conversations.
More visits.
More opportunities.
There usually are.
Until suddenly there is no more time.
One of the hardest lessons life teaches us is that we rarely know when a goodbye will be the last goodbye.
We assume there will be another phone call.
Another family gathering.
Another birthday.
Another Father’s Day.
Another opportunity to say the things we mean to say.
Most of the time, that assumption serves us well.
But every now and then life reminds us how precious our relationships really are.
Not in a way that should make us fearful.
In a way that should make us grateful.
Grateful enough to make the call.
Grateful enough to send the message.
Grateful enough to stop postponing the conversations that matter.
Because one day, for each of us, there will be a final conversation with someone we love.
And we won’t know it at the time.
Perhaps that is why today feels so significant.
Father’s Day reminds us to appreciate the people who shaped us.
International Yoga Day reminds us to reconnect with ourselves.
And the Summer Solstice reminds us to celebrate life.
I’ve always loved summer.
Particularly summer in London.
The parks are alive with people. Friends gather outside cafés. Conversations stretch into the evening because nobody wants the day to end. There is a feeling of possibility in the air.
Yesterday I was in London’s Trafalgar Square for the annual West End Live which is Europe’s largest free musical theatre festival. It showcases outstanding performances from over 50 London musicals.
It was an experience of sheer joy, togetherness, and a wonderful celebration of life.
Today, the longest day of the year in the northern hemipshere feels like an invitation to do more of the same.
An invitation to get outside.
To connect.
To appreciate.
To be present.
The photo accompanying today’s newsletter was taken during a sunset in Goa last December. Joyous people and majestic nature created a memorable kaleidoscope.
As I look at it now, I’m reminded of something simple.
Life is precious.
Not because it lasts forever.
But because it doesn’t.
The older I get, the more convinced I become that the richest experiences in life are not things we own.
They are moments we share.
A conversation that changes everything.
A walk with a friend.
A meal with family.
A laugh that leaves your face aching.
A sunset that makes everyone fall silent for a few moments.
These are the things that stay with us.
These are the things that make life meaningful.
So wherever you are today, I hope you find time for connection.
Connection with yourself.
Connection with someone you love.
Connection with nature.
Connection with life.
And if there is someone you’ve been meaning to contact for far too long, perhaps today is the day.
Make the call.
Send the message.
Arrange the coffee.
Don’t wait for the perfect moment.
Because the people we love deserve to know they matter while they are here to hear it.
P.S. If today’s reflection has landed in any way — perhaps reminding you of someone you’ve been meaning to reach out to, or highlighting areas where you feel a little disconnected — I’ve created a simple ScoreCard you can use to check in with yourself.
It’s a gentle way of noticing where you are right now in your life: what feels aligned, what feels a little off track, and where your energy is asking to be brought back into focus.
No fixing. No judgement. Just clarity.
Sometimes a few minutes of honest reflection is all it takes to reconnect with what really matters.
👉 [Take the Inner Transformation Scorecard]
Final ReflectionWho could you connect with today that would make your life — and theirs — a little richer?
“The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention.” — Thich Nhat Hanh
Glorious sunset from my bedroom
The post Three Celebrations, One Powerful Reminder for a Day of Connection appeared first on Arvind Devalia.
June 14, 2026
Make Your Mind Your Friend
How much of your life takes place inside your own head?
The conversation you replayed after it was over.
The mistake you wish you hadn’t made.
The argument you never had but have somehow won three times already.
The email you drafted in your mind before you’ve even opened your laptop.
The future scenario you’ve imagined a dozen different ways.
The worry that keeps returning, despite your best efforts to let it go.
Last Thursday evening, I attended a talk in London by Sister Jayanti of the Brahma Kumaris. Behind her on the screen were two simple words:
Overcoming Overthinking
I suspect those words resonated with many of us in the room.
After all, overthinking has become one of the defining habits of modern life.
We analyse.
We worry.
We compare.
We second-guess ourselves.
We replay the past and rehearse the future.
And in doing so, we often lose touch with the present moment — the only place where life is actually happening.
Sister Jayanti knows a thing or two about the workings of the mind.
Born in India in 1949, she has been practising Raja Yoga meditation since her late teens and has represented the Brahma Kumaris at the United Nations since 1982.
Today, as European Director of the organisation, she continues to travel the world sharing wisdom on meditation, self-awareness and inner peace.
The theme of the evening was overthinking.
But what unfolded was really a conversation about something much deeper.
It was about our relationship with ourselves.
One observation stayed with me long after I left the room.
She pointed out that four people can experience exactly the same situation and yet have completely different thoughts about it.
The difference lies not in the event itself but in what is happening within each individual.
That struck me.
We often assume that our stress, frustration or unhappiness is being caused by circumstances around us.
But perhaps the greater influence is the meaning we give to those circumstances.
The stories we tell ourselves.
The assumptions we make.
The fears we carry.
The conversations that take place in the privacy of our own minds.
The real question, therefore, is not:
“What is happening to me?”
But:
“What is happening within me?”
That shift feels subtle, yet it changes everything.
At one point, Sister Jayanti shared a simple idea that became the headline in my notebook for the rest of the evening:
“Make your mind your friend rather than your enemy.”
I found myself reflecting on that afterwards.
How many of us speak to ourselves with the same kindness, patience and encouragement that we would offer a close friend?
How often do we become our own harshest critic?
How often do we judge ourselves for mistakes we’ve made, replay conversations we wish had gone differently, or compare ourselves to where we think we should be by now?
The truth is that we are in conversation with ourselves every moment of every day.
The quality of that conversation shapes the quality of our lives.
Another distinction she made resonated deeply.
Productive thinking leads somewhere.
It helps us make a decision.
It gives us a new understanding.
It helps us solve a problem or take action.
Overthinking simply goes round in circles.
The same thoughts.
The same worries.
The same fears.
Nothing new emerges.
One of the simplest questions we can ask ourselves is:
“Am I becoming clearer, or am I simply repeating myself?”
If clarity is increasing, the thinking is serving us.
If not, we may be stuck in a mental loop.
One of the most powerful parts of the evening was her reminder that many of us don’t truly know ourselves.
We identify with our profession, our age, our achievements, our nationality or our circumstances.
Yet these things are merely descriptions.
They are not who we really are.
Real self-awareness requires the courage to look within and understand both our strengths and our weaknesses, our light and our shadow, our gifts and our growing edges.
Only then can genuine transformation begin.
This reminded me of something I often see in my coaching work.
People frequently come to coaching because they want to improve a particular area of their life.
Their career.
Their health.
Their relationships.
Their confidence.
Their sense of purpose.
Yet beneath all of these challenges is often a deeper question:
“Do I really know myself?”
Because when we know ourselves, we make better decisions.
When we know ourselves, we stop seeking approval from everyone else.
When we know ourselves, we begin to trust ourselves.
And when we trust ourselves, life becomes simpler.
Not necessarily easier.
But certainly clearer.
During the Q&A, someone asked how to deal with feeling overwhelmed when there are simply too many things demanding our attention.
I suspect most of us can relate to that.
There are times when everything feels urgent.
Every problem feels important.
Every decision feels significant.
The result is mental clutter.
Her suggestion was practical and wise.
Step back.
Create space.
Prioritise.
Ask yourself what truly needs attention now and what can wait.
In other words, create clarity.
That idea immediately made me think of the Inner TransformationScorecard that many of you have taken over the last few months.
One of the biggest challenges people face isn’t a lack of motivation or capability.
It’s a lack of clarity.
They know something feels out of alignment.
They know they want more from life.
They know they are capable of more.
But they are not sure where to focus.
The Scorecard was designed to help answer exactly that question.
Because when everything feels important, nothing receives the attention it deserves.
Clarity creates momentum.
Focus creates progress.
And progress creates confidence.
As the evening drew to a close, Sister Jayanti guided us through a short meditation.
She invited us to hold a single thought of peace in our minds and simply observe what happened.
Nothing dramatic.
Nothing complicated.
Just a gentle reminder that peace is not something we need to chase.
It is something we can return to.
Again and again.
Perhaps that was my biggest takeaway from the evening.
We spend so much of our lives trying to manage the outside world.
But maybe the deeper work is learning how to manage our inner world with greater awareness, compassion and wisdom.
Maybe the most important connection of all is the connection we have with ourselves.
Because every other relationship in our lives grows from there.
The evening sparked far more reflections than I can fit into a single newsletter, and over the coming weeks I’ll be sharing a longer article exploring some of Sister Jayanti’s teachings on overthinking, self-respect, meditation and inner peace.
For now, I’d encourage you to consider one simple question.
Reflection
What thought, worry or story have you been carrying around recently that no longer deserves free rent in your mind?
And if you’re looking for greater clarity about where to focus your energy and attention right now, you can take my free Inner Transformation Scorecard below.
It only takes a few minutes and may help you identify the one area of your life that is ready for your attention, growth and transformation.
[Take the Inner Transformation Scorecard here]
Until next time,
“Make your mind your friend rather than your enemy.” – Sister Jayanti
Further Reading
The wisdom shared during Sister Jayanti’s talk sparked many more reflections than I could fit into this newsletter. Later this week I’ll be publishing a companion article exploring some of the deeper lessons from the evening, including self-respect, meditation, peace of mind and the difference between productive thinking and overthinking.
The post Make Your Mind Your Friend appeared first on Make It Happen.
June 10, 2026
The Connection Revolution: Life Can’t Be Postponed
Over the past few weeks, I have found myself thinking deeply about life and what truly matters.
A close friend recently lost his sixteen-year-old son.
Earlier this week, I attended the funeral of a friend’s brother who died at the age of sixty.
Both losses have affected me deeply. Not because I knew these individuals particularly well, but because events like these have a way of stopping us in our tracks.
They remind us of something we all know intellectually, yet often forget in the busyness of everyday life:
Life is precious.
Life is fragile.
And none of us knows how much time we have.
Last night, with some friends I watched the film Up in the Air, starring George Clooney.
If you’ve seen it, you’ll know that Clooney plays a man who spends most of his life travelling. He lives out of a suitcase, moves from airport to airport, and has built an identity around freedom, independence, and never being tied down.
On the surface, he appears to have it all figured out.
Yet beneath it all is a quiet emptiness.
As the story unfolds, he begins to realise that despite all his success and freedom, something important is missing. He has spent so much time moving through life that he has never truly allowed himself to belong to it.
What he is really missing is connection.
Love.
Meaningful relationships.
A co-pilot for the journey.
As the credits rolled, I couldn’t help wondering how many of us are living a version of that story.
Most of us aren’t flying around the world every week, but many of us are constantly in motion. Busy. Distracted. Chasing goals, managing responsibilities, trying to stay on top of everything.
Yet in the process, it is surprisingly easy to postpone the very things that matter most.
The phone call we keep meaning to make.
The friend we haven’t seen for months.
The difficult conversation we need to have.
The gratitude we haven’t expressed.
The love we assume people already know we feel.
That is one reason why the recent losses around me have felt so significant.
They are reminders not to postpone life.
As many of you know, I have been writing recently about what I call The Connection Revolution.
At its heart is a simple idea: in a world that often feels increasingly disconnected, genuine human connection has never been more important.
Yet I am beginning to think the Connection Revolution is not just about making new connections.
It is about deepening the ones we already have.
When someone dies, nobody talks about how many emails they answered.
Nobody talks about how busy they were.
Nobody talks about the number of meetings they attended.
Instead, people tell stories.
They remember kindness.
They remember laughter.
They remember generosity.
They remember how that person made them feel.
In other words, they remember connection.
Many years ago, when my father died, I began a journey of grief and healing that taught me lessons no book ever could.
Losing a parent changes you.
At first there is shock and sadness. Then there is the gradual realisation that life has permanently changed. The person you could always call, visit, or seek advice from is no longer physically here.
For a long time, I found myself missing the conversations we would never have and the moments we would never share.
Yet something else slowly emerged alongside the grief.
Gratitude.
Gratitude that he had been part of my life.
Gratitude for the values he passed on to me.
Gratitude for the love that remained long after he was gone.
One of the most important lessons I learned is that grief is not the opposite of love.
Grief is the continuation of love.
It is love searching for somewhere to go.
The reason loss hurts so much is because the connection mattered.
And perhaps that is the gift hidden within grief.
It reminds us what is truly important.
👉 I’ve written more deeply about losing my father here, if you’d like to read it:
How to Start Living Again After the Loss of a Loved One
The older I get, the less convinced I am that the purpose of life is success.
Success has its place.
Achievement has its place.
Ambition has its place.
But I increasingly believe that a meaningful life is built upon something deeper.
Connection.
Connection with ourselves.
Connection with those we love.
Connection with our communities.
Connection with something greater than ourselves.
At the end of our lives, I doubt many of us will wish we had attended one more meeting or spent more time scrolling through our phones.
I suspect we will wish we had loved more deeply, forgiven more freely, laughed more often, and spent more time with the people who matter most.
One of the things loss does is force us to pause and take stock of our lives.
It prompts questions we often avoid when life is busy.
Am I living in alignment with what matters most?
Am I giving enough time to the people I love?
Am I living the life I truly want, or simply drifting through it?
These are not always comfortable questions, but they are often the questions that lead to the greatest growth.
And they are the questions I’ve been sitting with personally as I reflect on connection, loss, and what it means to live well.
To support this kind of reflection, I recently created something called the Inner Transformation Diagnostic Tool.
It’s a simple way to pause and take an honest look at where you are in your life right now — not from judgement, but from awareness.
Sometimes we don’t need more information. We need more clarity about what’s already true.
👉 [Take the Inner Transformation Diagnostic Test]
It may or may not resonate with you right now. But if it does, treat it as a moment to step back and reconnect with yourself before stepping forward again.
Perhaps that is why these recent losses have affected me so deeply.
They have reminded me that life is happening now.
Not next year.
Not when things calm down.
Not when we finally have more time.
Now.
If there is someone you have been meaning to call, call them.
If there is someone you appreciate, tell them.
If there is a friendship that needs attention, reach out.
If there is a relationship that needs healing, take the first step.
Not because life is short, although it is.
But because connection is the reason we are here.
That, to me, is the true meaning of The Connection Revolution.
Not collecting more contacts.
Not building bigger networks.
Not gathering more followers.
But choosing to be fully present with the people who are already part of our lives.
Because one day, what will remain are not the things we accumulated or the achievements we collected.
What will remain are the lives we touched.
The kindness we shared.
The conversations we had.
The love we gave.
And the love we received.
A Reflection For This Week
Who is someone you care about that you haven’t spoken to for a while?
Who needs to hear from you?
Who needs to know they matter?
And perhaps one final question:
Are you living the life you truly want to be living?
Not tomorrow.
Not someday.
Now.
Because the life we cannot afford to postpone is the one we are living right now.
P.S. If this article has stirred something in you — a reflection, a pause, or a question about how you’re living right now — I’ve created a simple Inner Transformation Diagnostic Tool you can use to explore that more deeply.
It’s not about fixing anything. It’s about clarity.Reconnecting with yourself doesn’t require a life crisis. It just requires a few minutes of honesty.
👉 [Take the Inner Transformation Diagnostic Test]
PPS. On a lighter note, there was a fun, unexpected moment last weekend that made me smile — giant Indian puppets took over Exhibition Road in Kensington!
A reminder that even in reflective weeks, life still finds ways to surprise us in the simplest ways.
The post The Connection Revolution: Life Can’t Be Postponed appeared first on Make It Happen.
June 2, 2026
The Connection Revolution: Why True Connection Starts from Within
In my last post, I wrote about The Connection Revolution and the growing need for genuine human connection in an increasingly disconnected world.
The response was wonderful. Many of you shared how deeply you resonated with the paradox of modern life: that despite being more digitally connected than ever, so many of us feel lonely, disconnected, or strangely adrift.
As I reflected on your responses this week, a profound truth kept coming back to me: Before we can truly connect with others, we must first reconnect with ourselves.
I learned this lesson the hard way more than twenty years ago.
At the time, my dot-com company had collapsed, my marriage was ending, my house was on the market and I was unemployed. It felt as though every pillar of my life was crumbling simultaneously.
One evening, shortly after my wife and I had shared the news of our separation with our families nd we had stopped living together, I found myself sitting alone in the quiet of the night.
For the first time in years, the distractions were gone. There was nowhere left to hide from the reality of my life.
Sitting there, I realized tears were streaming down my face. The sadness was overwhelming. I felt lost, frightened, angry, regretful, and deeply uncertain about the future.
For hours, I wrestled with those heavy emotions—replaying decisions, questioning my worth, and wondering how it had all come to this.
Yet, somewhere in the middle of that emotional storm, something shifted.
I began to realise that while I couldn’t rewrite the past, I was entirely responsible for what happened next. A quiet sense of determination began to emerge. I didn’t have a grand, flawless plan, but I knew my immediate next step: I needed to find a job and begin rebuilding.
The very next morning, I set out job-hunting and within a month I had three job offers.
Looking back now, I can see that the most important thing that happened that evening wasn’t actually the decision to find work.
It was the decision to stop running from myself.
For the first time in a long time, I got radically honest about where I was, what truly mattered to me, and what I wanted my future to look like. That painful moment of self-awareness became the foundation for everything I built next.
Over the years—both through my own journey and through coaching hundreds of clients—I have seen this exact pattern play out time and again.
Most people think they need a better strategy.
Often, what they need first is greater awareness.
Our lives are constantly dropping clues. They show up in our energy levels, the quality of our relationships, our fulfillment at work, our physical health, and the frustrating patterns that keep repeating themselves. The challenge is that we are usually too busy, too distracted, or too noisy to notice.
This is why the Connection Revolution must start within.
Before we can build deeper, more authentic relationships with others, we need a stronger relationship with ourselves. Before we can create meaningful change, we need clarity. And clarity only begins when we slow down enough to pay attention.
It is also exactly why I created the Inner Transformation Diagnostic Tool.
[Take the Inner Transformation Diagnostic Tool here]
The purpose of this tool isn’t to give you a rigid set of instructions or tell you what to do. Think of it as a mirror. It is designed to help you step back, cut through the noise, and gain a clear, honest picture of where you are right now.
Because awareness is always where transformation begins.
I’d love to hear your thoughts. Which of these five questions resonated with you the most today? Leave a comment below and let’s connect.”
Your InvitationIf you would like to gain greater clarity on where you are on your own journey, I invite you to take the Inner Transformation Diagnostic Tool.
[Take the Inner Transformation Diagnostic Tool here]
It only takes a few minutes, but it may reveal the exact insights you need to reconnect with what matters most.
Perhaps the most vital relationship you will ever navigate is the one you have with yourself.
And perhaps the revolution starts right there.
Thank you for reading. If you want to receive these insights directly in your inbox every Sunday morning—along with real-time updates from my week—you can join my community by subscribing to the Connection Revolution Newsletter.
The post The Connection Revolution: Why True Connection Starts from Within appeared first on Make It Happen.
May 26, 2026
The Connection Revolution: Why We Need Radical Connection More Than Ever
The newly opened Queent Elizabeth II Garden in its full glory
We Are More Connected — And More Disconnected — Than Ever“With great power comes great responsibility.”
Most of us hear that phrase and think about politicians, billionaires, celebrities, or world leaders.
But what if the real power lies much closer to home?
What if your power is your attention?
Your presence.
Your willingness to speak to a stranger.
Your courage to truly listen.
Your decision to look up from your phone and connect with another human being.
We are living in an age of endless communication — and yet increasing disconnection.
We scroll through people’s lives while barely knowing our neighbours.
We collect followers while feeling lonely.
We react to headlines but avoid eye contact on the train.
Something is broken.
And maybe what we need now is not more content, more noise, or more productivity hacks.
Maybe what we need is radical connection.
Not surface-level politeness.
Not networking.
Not another “How are you?” followed by not waiting for the answer.
I mean real connection. Honest connection. Human connection.
The kind that requires presence.
The kind that risks vulnerability.
The kind that reminds people they matter.
As I write this, I’m sitting on a bench in Regent’s Park on a beautiful spring afternoon.
Nature is everywhere around me. The trees are alive with colour and movement. Dogs are racing across the grass. Friends are sitting on benches actually talking to one another. The sun is shining and there is a softness in the air that makes people seem more open, more human.
And it strikes me that this is the perfect place to connect.
Not only with others, but with ourselves too.
Every week, I volunteer here as a ranger — a role that allows me to be in my favourite park while helping others discover its beauty, history, wildlife, and quiet joy.
There is something deeply fulfilling about watching visitors slow down, notice a flower, discover a hidden corner, or simply pause long enough to appreciate where they are.
Recently, an extraordinary new garden opened here — the Queen Elizabeth II Garden — created to honour and celebrate the life of the late Queen.
It opened just a few weeks ago, and over the next year, around a million visitors are expected to pass through.
A million people.
When I think about that, it feels like being part of something much bigger than me.
Not just a garden.
Not just volunteering.
But a living space of beauty, remembrance, nature, and human connection.
And what a gift it is.
A gift to welcome and connect with people from every corner of the world — families, tourists, gardeners, walkers, curious visitors, and fellow lovers of nature.
Different languages. Different stories. Different lives.
Yet so often, the same quiet sense of wonder.
In a world obsessed with taking, consuming, and broadcasting, volunteering feels quietly rebellious.
It is my way of giving something back.
It is also my way of sharing one of my deepest passions: nature.
But perhaps even more importantly, it reminds me that connection does not happen by accident.
It happens through intention.
Through presence.
Through slowing down enough to notice another human being.
And notice their inner beauty.
Why This Matters So Much to Me
There was a time in my own life when I felt disconnected — not necessarily from people, but from myself. I know what it feels like to go through the motions, to feel uncertain, overwhelmed, and untethered from what truly matters.
Perhaps that is one reason nature has become so important to me.
Walking through Regent’s Park each week reminds me that healing often begins by reconnecting — with ourselves, with others, and with the world around us.
And science now confirms what many of us already feel intuitively.
Research shows that people with strong social connections can significantly improve their chances of living longer, healthier lives. Strong relationships are linked to lower levels of anxiety and depression, improved physical health, and even increased longevity.
Connection is not a luxury.
It is a lifeline.
The Courage of Radical ConnectionRadical connection means daring to care in a world that often rewards indifference.
It means keeping your heart open when it would be easier to shut down.
It means speaking to the person nobody notices.
It means risking rejection instead of hiding behind cynicism.
Because here is the uncomfortable question:
What happens if we don’t?
What happens to society when loneliness becomes normal?
When community disappears?
When people stop feeling seen, heard, and valued?
We are already seeing the consequences everywhere — division, outrage, isolation, anxiety, burnout.
The Connection Revolution is not about being “nice.”
It is about refusing to accept a disconnected world as normal.
It is about reclaiming conversation.
It is about reclaiming community.
It is about reclaiming humanity.
TCS London Marathon 2026.Mile 10 Melodies Surrey Quays
A Tiny Revolution Starts HereSeeing the energy and unity of the London Marathon — thousands of people supporting strangers, encouraging one another, and moving together with shared purpose — reminds me of something simple but easy to forget:
We already know how to connect. We just don’t always choose to.
So here is my invitation to you this week:
Put your phone away for an hour.
Go outside.
Be present.
Really see the people around you.
Talk to someone — not because you need anything from them, but because they are human, just like you. And really listen.
Smile at a stranger.
Check in with a friend properly.
Sit in a park and notice the world again.
Reconnect with nature.
Reconnect with yourself.
Start small. But start deliberately.
Because revolutions don’t begin with noise or scale.
They begin with attention.
And attention, when shared with another human being, becomes connection.
Start a tiny revolution of connection wherever you are.
Final thoughtThe world does not change through algorithms.
It changes through people.
And perhaps the greatest power we have right now is our ability to deeply connect with another human being.
The question is:
What will you do with it?
What does radical connection mean to you?
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.
PS I am now finally recovered from the London Marathon 4 weeks ago. It took me much longer this time to get back to my usual bouncy self.
You still have time to sponsor my London Marathon participation for Marie Curie:-
https://2026tcslondonmarathon.enthuse.com/pf/arvind-devalia
I am at £2,204 as I write this – help me reach my target of £2,500 🙂
And heartfelt thanks to those of you who have already sponsored me so generously.
With Gratitude
Arvind Devalia
TCS London Marathon 2026 – Rainbow Row Mile 21
The post The Connection Revolution: Why We Need Radical Connection More Than Ever appeared first on Make It Happen.
