Sangay Glass's Blog - Posts Tagged "partners"

Okay, you've been seeing each other regularly for a few weeks, and things are heating up, but the hormones are starting to calm down.

Now you're at the crossroads and paying attention to the traffic lights. Are you stopping, proceeding with caution, or going full speed ahead?

Here are some signs to help you decide if you've got a green light.

Using the characters from my novel Kate, Blue Jeans, and a Single Shot, let's explore. Kate represents the tendency to hand over control in a relationship, while Blue Jeans represents a nurturing companion.

The Right One Will Respect Your Individuality

Early in the relationship, it's natural to explore each other's interests. Trying new things your new companion likes is a positive sign, but it's crucial to maintain who you are. Your individuality is what makes you unique, and it's important to find a partner who respects that.

One thing women, in particular, do is refrain from participating in planning dates. Guys get frustrated by this and stop asking what you want to eat or what you want to do. So we go along and get lost.

Kate is a giver. Instead of expressing her wants, she prefers to go along with the program to keep the peace. Blue Jeans recognizes this and takes great care not to give up asking.

The right one will be happy with a give-and-take situation.

They Will Celebrate Your Wins

Praise never feels better than when it's coming from someone you care about. It says they see and appreciate you. Even small recognition for things like getting a promotion or simply having a good day carries great weight. Having someone notice is the icing on the cake.

Kate never played Jeopardy, but it's one of Blue Jean's favorite pastimes. He's happy about it when she beats him at his own game.

A healthy relationship is not a competition.

They Listen Without Getting Defensive

Open communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. If something doesn't sit well with you, expressing your feelings is not just okay, it's essential. Remember, your emotions are valid, and a partner who truly cares will listen and understand, even if it's not what they want to hear.

After a strange evening where Kate accompanied Blue Jeans while he made his work rounds. She noticed he was hurried and distant. She suspected he was doing something illegal and wanted answers. So, she wanted to know the deal, and he came clean without getting defensive, making excuses, or lying.

It isn't easy in the early stages, but speaking up is important. Someone who cares wants to be truthful because, deep down, they can't keep up the act.

The Take Away

Start right, stay true to yourself, and always return the favor by making sure your new companion does the same.
Kate, Blue Jeans, and a Single Shot

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Jay watched Kate climb the stairs with an armful of warm folded towels from the dryer.

It was the perfect opportunity.

He kicked off his shoes and followed her unnoticed as she opened the linen closet door and placed the towels inside.

When she closed it, he was there, with an intentionally mischievous smirk.

She wasn't surprised, evidenced by a slight coy smile. He'd been stalking her all morning, and she loved it.

He pressed her against the wall and kissed her, then walked away.

Not yet, babe. He would get back to her later.

My character, Jay, didn't have great examples of marital bliss growing up, but he did work as an assistant to a professional mistress for years. She taught him the art of seduction using patience, timing, and the element of surprise. He put his skills into practice to keep his marriage fresh and healthy.

We all get into ruts at some point in our marriage, especially when we're busy with kids and careers, and our sex lives suffer for it.

When we were in the dating pool, we put effort into seduction. It was that effort and anticipation that made sex amazing in the beginning. But somewhere along the line, a simple touch became foreplay, and a minute alone turned into "It's now or never."

If you're stuck, it's time to extend your foreplay with seduction.

Did you know Llamas do it? Not really, but close. Llama reproduction involves induced ovulation. The male sings and chirps to his potential mate to bring on ovulation. The female usually spits at him initially because she doesn't know him, but he'll get the prize if he's persistent.

Date nights are a great concept, but the rush to get the kids settled and the planning distracts from the goal of intimacy. You're both over it by the time you get to where you're going and spitting may be involved in the form of snipping.

Start early in the day. A knowing smile over a coffee cup during breakfast, a reach over their head to get a plate, and a long embrace, instead of a quick kiss on the way out the door will go a long way.

It's also a two-way street. If your partner needs to learn, lead by example.

If you want to be pushed up against the hall wall, do it to them to show how exciting it can be.

And guys, roll up those sleeves, move them aside, and take over emptying the dishwasher with a generous smile. You'll be surprised at the results.

The point is that intimacy is better with anticipation. The longer you take to set up anticipation, the faster you'll get there.

By there, I mean the big O. You're welcome.

Don't forget! Today is the last day to enter the giveaway! Enter the Goodreads Givaway

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Ever feel like modern dating comes with hidden fees? Love might be a thrill ride, but does it need an extended warranty?

Some people want commitment insurance—that long-term, all-inclusive plan with repair services (aka couple’s therapy), roadside assistance (aka emotional support), and maybe even a lemon law clause for when things go south.

Others? They prefer the as-is deal—no warranties, no coverage, just good times until the engine gives out.

So, what’s your take? Do relationships run smoother without the fine print? Or is it worth securing a warranty—just in case?

Candice knows better than to trust in guarantees—especially when the fine print is written by a killer.
Ledge Pond

Love, in my stories doesn't strike like lightning. There's no orchestra swelling as eyes meet across a crowded room. No breathless moment of recognition that says, "This is it."

Because love, real love, doesn’t happen like that. Not in the world my characters live in.

They meet in crisis. In chaos. In bruised, imperfect moments where no one is looking for connection, but somehow find it anyway.

They don’t fall in love—they grow in it. Layer by layer. Conversation by conversation.

Sometimes it's a wordless bond in shared silence.

Sometimes it's banter that turns into trust.

And eventually, it's the realization that they are safer with each other than without. That's where my love stories begin.

Because love born in hardship isn't fragile. It's forged.

Ledge Pond

Not always obviously. Not always loudly. But undeniably.

They're the ones who look at the woman and think, I’d burn the world down to make her feel safe.

And they mean it. Not because they’re broken or desperate—but because they see her clearly, often before she sees herself.

These men don’t play games. They don’t push buttons to test loyalty or withhold affection to gain control. They show up.

Whether it's protecting her from real danger or just bringing her coffee after a long night—they're already there.

And when they fall, they fall completely. Their love is not fragile. It’s steadfast, sometimes clumsy, but always real.

Because the most powerful thing a man can do in a dark world is choose softness. Choose love. And maintain it.