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Steven Paglierani

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Steven Paglierani

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Born
in Nyack, NY, The United States
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May 2008


Steven Paglierani is an author, teacher, social worker, and scientist whose writings describe the world through the lens of Asperger's. As a licensed therapist, he teaches others—including those with Asperger’s—to stop imitating normal and to be themselves. He’s created the first natural description of human personality, a theory wherein everything derives from a single fractal pattern. He’s also built and raced Shelby Mustangs, been a singer / song writer mentioned in Rolling Stone, and designed his best friend’s home as a wedding gift. ...more

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Steven Paglierani First, Karen, I love the respectful but honest way you ask questions.

As to your question about feelings, if you read my answer to your question about …more
First, Karen, I love the respectful but honest way you ask questions.

As to your question about feelings, if you read my answer to your question about ideas, you’ll know that when I refer to “feelings,” I am not referring to the usual vague, nebulous entity which most people use this word to refer to. Rather, I am referring only to things whose essence is “invisible change.” Moreover, as you may have read, I then subdivide feelings into a complementary pair: mind feelings and body feelings. And of all the things in Book I, I wish I had found a better way to refer to these two things. I find these word choices lead to far too much confusion.

Then again, this inadequacy; that it’s impossible to truly describe feelings in words, is precisely what I’m referring to here. Moreover, this only points yet again to how accurate my description is of how feelings emerge: they are what we experience when we exceed our ability to describe experience with facts, stories, and ideas.

As to your comment regarding yours and your client’s experiences, to be honest, I think I’d need to hear more specifics as to what you are referring to here. If I read you right, you’re saying you and your clients can simultaneously experience feelings and ideas. Here, I suspect you’re right again; that this is more what it looks like from the outside than what it is on the inside.

So let me ask. Given you use my definition and not the usual, can you see it’s logically impossible to simultaneously experience “invisible change” and “invisible unchange?” And yes, a person in a heightened state of personal awareness can sometimes alternate between these two states so rapidly as to make it difficult at times to see this separation. This is similar to how modern computers preemptively multitask (rapidly allot alternate slices of time to multiple tasks), giving the appearance of doing more than one thing at a time. But in truth, they are doing only one thing in any given moment.

Know this is one of the main ways I gain an understanding of human nature. Because we humans normally create our technology in our likeness and image (the result of existing inside the fish tank), understanding our technology is a good way to discern the limits of human nature.

Now were you to sit and rub your hand on your leg while trying your best to not lose touch with this sensation, not even for a millisecond, AND were you to simultaneously try to tell me what you are feeling, you’d find that each time you speak, think, or write words, you momentarily disconnect from the experience of this sensation. This explains why asking a client, “so how does that make you feel” is such poor way to do therapy. Words about feelings are ideas and ideas shut off feelings. Whereas feelings are the wordless experience of not having words. So focusing on feelings shuts off ideas or at least renders then empty of meaning.

Finally, on my walk this morning, I kept thinking of how easily I was able to discern your personally honest questions from those people sometimes pose to me on Quora, wherein they’re simply trying to find fault of pick a fight. In the latter case, I rarely answer, let alone spend time considering the questions. But in your case, I knew in a heartbeat, your questions fell into the former category. The category I truly love to answer. The kinds of question I so love feeling but in truth, feel so inadequate to describe.

Thank you again.(less)
Steven Paglierani First, Karen, thank you so much for your questions. And please forgive what I’m afraid may be a rather lengthy response. Outside of my clients and for…moreFirst, Karen, thank you so much for your questions. And please forgive what I’m afraid may be a rather lengthy response. Outside of my clients and formal students, I rarely meet someone who actually has it in them to push through such dense material. In truth, most people who meet me find it hard to reconcile the heady writer of my books with the gentle man who so easily wells up from their stories.

Also, I am currently working on paperback 2nd editions of my books, hopefully to be released by year end. My point for telling you this is that I have been, this very morning, writing a new preface to Book I. So when your questions arrived, my whole body grinned. I then got up and went on a walk, smiling the whole time, while once again considering how perfect the Universe is.

Now before I answer your questions, I’d like to ask you to imagine a context for our exchange. And while it may at first sound off-putting, I’d like to ask you to imagine that I am an alien being trying to understand what it is like to be human. Know this is not too far from my personal truth, as my experience of having Asperger’s has often led me to experience conversations as something akin to this. But to clarify a bit, I am asking you to consider how my books attempt to describe the human experience as what someone watching “from outside of the fish tank” might see.

So, inside the fish tank human beings normally look to understand things with “dictionary style definitions.” Here, the form would be, “an idea is . . .” followed by words which describe one or more single points. In fact, the first dictionary I opened lists the following six single points: an idea is [1] a concept, [2] a plan, [3] a thought, [4] a sense, [5] a meaning, [6] an estimate.

Now if you think about it, none of this could possibly satisfy an alien being asking you to comprehensively define the human experience of “ideas.” Rather, each of these six single points merely refers to a way ideas are used; what we do with them—but not what they are, nor what they are not.

In my work, proper definitions require logically geometric expressions, such as the wise men’s map. Here all things, including “ideas,” are defined both by the essence of what they are (ideas are “invisible unchange”), and by the essence of what they are not (ideas are not “invisible change,” “visible change,” or “visible unchange”).

Please spend a few minutes trying to find something a human mind could experience which falls outside of these four things. About this, I’m sure you’ll find there can be no such thing. Thus, the way I’ve defined ideas is both complete in scope (nothing is left out), and can be easily measured in any real world situation (it either is invisible and unchanging OR it is not).

As to the first of your two questions, I admit, you’ve rephrased it pretty well. Ideas do come from facts. But for an idea to emerge from facts, you first need to have many contextual, fact-gathering experiences; many times wherein you contrast and compare these experiences in context while looking for the context-free, sine qua non of these experiences. An idea is what emerges from this type of condensation and in a way is simply the meta-experience of these experiences.(less)
Average rating: 4.38 · 21 ratings · 14 reviews · 9 distinct works
The Science of Discovery

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Finding Personal Truth Book...

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Solving the Mind Body Myste...

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“Feelings are what you experience when you try to access the immeasurable.”
Steven Paglierani, Solving the Mind Body Mystery: (Finding Personal Truth - in the too-much-information age) Book 1

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