Andrew Heaton

“In the Middle Ages it was a lot more fun to blame things like crop failure or redheads on witches, then set mouthy old women or cats on fire to try to fix the problem. The real reason for famine was in fact more complicated, and involved meteorology and low temperatures and fungal infections and whatnot. But an angry, starving mob didn’t understand explanations about wheat blights half as well as they understood “evil sorcerers” standing right across from them, ready to be skewered with pitchforks.”
― Andrew Heaton, Laughter is Better Than Communism

“Once, while I was in college, a guy nearly triggered an aneurism over the phone, overwhelmed with his anger at being bothered by ours and other campaigns calling him at home (to interrupt his supper). He announced he was going to vote for our principle opponent, because her campaign had not bothered him yet. It took two other campaign volunteers to restrain me from immediately calling back with a fake accent on behalf of her campaign. There”
― Andrew Heaton, Laughter is Better Than Communism