Callie Browning's Blog - Posts Tagged "barbados"

Name: Callie Browning

Age: 30-ish

Nationality: Barbadian (fuh real)

Likes: Coconut, fun people and Harry Potter

Favourite books: Harry Potter series, Little house on the prairie series, Anne of Green Gables, Silken Threads

Favourite authors: J K Rowling, Stephen King, Dr. Seuss and a couple of others.

Recent (and only work): The Shadow Guardian

I've experienced lots of things in my life. Every challenge you face as a person only helps you to grow. Adolescence, heartbreak and making major life decisions add something intrinsic to your personal DNA that alternately improves and ruins who you are as a person.

We could discuss things are diverse as childbirth and divorce, but no... I'm talking about something far more fearful and mind-numbing: being a writer.

At every juncture of writing my book, I was faced with what I initially assumed were insurmountable challenges. I agonized over developing my characters and worried about some aspects of my book seeming too cliched. I worried that I wouldn't have enough money to package it properly.

Then, when I thought I had passed the worst, I got a major eye opener. The self-published book business is MAJOR. It's bigger than I even imagined. People bandied about numbers in the range of 80,000 new releases being published a month!

How on earth could I break through all of that clutter with my limited budget? How could I make enough noise to be heard over the din of all the James Pattersons and Dan Browns of this world?

But, lemme tell ya... it turns out that those things were the least of my worries.

Eventually,I put those issues behind me and figured I was ready to move forward. I thought I had gotten to a point where I could just put up my feet and let the book do its own work.

Written and edited? Check
Decent looking cover art? Check
Publicized to family, friends and unassuming strangers? Check, Check, Check.

But wait! There's more. It turns out that I wasn't ready for the emotional turnstile that is public scrutiny.

"I love it!" "I hate it!" "More sex!" "More duppies!" "I'm allergic to duppies!"

It ain't easy to tolerate being boosted up and then deflated so quickly. It made me realize that this is what celebrities deal with everyday. And makes me commend the ones that go to rehab because it would be much easier to keep trying to dull your pain.

I kid you. I'm certainly not a proponent of drugs.(Drugs are bad)

So...what does any self-respecting aspiring author do?

Not cry. Just because I'm creative doesn't mean I'm overly emotional.

Major introspection. And I've realized that writing is an art. All art is subject to scrutiny and the fact that people love or hate your work could easily mean that you have done enough to elicit strong feelings about your work.
I wrote and released my book because I felt I had something different to say. Something that strongly reflected my culture and my people in a way that hadn't been done before. I'm not trying to be a pioneer but I'll admit that I want people (droves of them if I had my way) to hear what I have to say.
There are all kinds of people in this world and it's unlikely that each of us can have the same opinion. That's why there are words like "consensus" to give us an overarching feeling of what public opinion really is.


We all have our own version of the truth and I think as long as each of us tells it in a way that we're satisfied with, that should be enough. I would encourage each and every writer out there to find their truth, get some broad shoulders and shout it from the rooftops if they can.
As a friend of mine says all the time, "Do you want the truth or a fancy story?" Any good writer would reply, "I've always been partial to fancy stories." :)

http://www.amazon.com/The-Shadow-Guar...

Sooo. Last week I wrote my first goodreads blog. It was cool. I got a couple of likes, fans and followers. I even got it posted on Pumped Up Your Book. http://www.pumpupyourbook.com/2013/09...

I was all fussy with myself. (In Barbados when we say "fussy" we mean super excited - expect to see that word a lot from me).

And then a bell went off in my head. I thought to myself "these people are only following and liking you because they liked what you said. Do you have something else to say?"

Inertia set in. Because I didn't really expect anyone to think of my rant as follow worthy. What now, smarty pants? So I sat down and thought about today's post long and hard. Well not very long. After I finished my orange juice I started writing.

I realized that this following and liking had occurred when I came clean and decided to just speak my truth. How does this relate to being an author?
Simple, I say. That's what we're supposed to do as authors. The parts of my book that I'm getting kudos on are the parts that I was really feeling as I wrote. Those are the parts that touch people and make them feel something vividly.

This revelation was a huge turning point for me. Why try to be something that I'm not when what I am is so much more powerful?

Let's face it. If you know you're not particularly adept at writing fiction but you're writing it because you think it will sell well you're doing yourself an injustice. People can read between the lines. Both literally and figuratively.

When we are most honest with ourselves is when we shine. I suggest that each of us find what we're passionate about and really dig into it. Because that's how we will make ourselves worthy of adulation from all of the fans we'd love to have. How many times have you watched a movie and thought that it felt forced? What about the times you've seen art that just looks like a bunch of paint strokes on a canvas and scoffed in disdain?

Don't forget that writing is just another artistic expression. Search for what you can properly express. You might be surprised to realize that what you're really good at writing is short stories or screen plays. Writers block is normal but when inertia sets in that's when you know you're fighting against the tide.

I have a friend who skydives. It's part of his job so he doesn't do it as a hobby. As a matter of fact, it's the part of his job that he dislikes the most.

He loathes the feeling of getting into the plane, knowing that soon he will be hurling himself from it.

There's nothing he hates more than the wind savagely whipping at his face as he stands by the door, staring down at the earth.

And he resents taking the final plunge, watching it all coming closer and closer at a frenetic pace. So, what does he do to counter all of this? He does what he can to negate the risks by packing his own parachute.

But here comes the problem: he packs and re-packs and re-packs it again and again, his stomach getting more and more queasy with every round of re-packing, until he's ready to board the plane.

Why?

Because packing a parachute properly is critical to it actually opening and performing the way it should. Heaven forbid that it doesn't open when the ripcord is pulled. Can you blame the poor fellow for driving himself insane every time he unpacks the darned thing?

What does this have to do with anything? If you think about it, parachuting is just like writing. I do what I can behind the scenes, tooling and re-tooling my work, feeding self-doubt at every turn. I second guess everything: names, places, situations. The last thing I want is to present work that feels insincere or contrived.
So I do like Coco Chanel says and I remove one thing... and then one more thing from my book before publishing it.

And it turns out, that one thing I've removed, is the thing that so many people tell me they wish was in the book!

Sigh.

So, what do I do? I'll rewrite and reinsert the segment I removed and I'll learn to ignore Coco whispering in my ear. Because, going with your gut and having confidence in your work is the most amazing feeling there is. Free-falling into the world of self-publishing is liberating. It has validated me in a way I didn't know was possible. All of these emails and messages from readers admonishing me when I admit that I purposely took out some segments is so inspiring to me.

I wake up each day with renewed purpose, knowing that I can be a good writer once I trust in myself. I can't thank each of you enough for having the guts to call me out on some of my decisions.

So I'll take this chance to give some great advice to all of my fellow indie writers.

“Success is most often achieved by those who don't know that failure is inevitable.”
― Coco Chanel

Hey... Coco can't be wrong all of the time.

You know how some sites ask you which stars you would cast if your book was ever made into a movie?

I always dismissed it, because let's face it: there's a reason why those books make the news. Because it's rare for any book to sell its movie rights, thus making it news worthy.

But as I prepare to do some fresh writing on another book, I had an epiphany. I can't imagine who I'd cast as the major characters but I suddenly saw Rihanna dressed as the fortune teller and playing the role exactly the way I'd want it reenacted.

It's weird how it happened. In my mind's eye I suddenly saw the scene where Lady Oya shoves open the door and there stood Rihanna.

Tell me what you think. Can you picture Rihanna as the fortune teller?

So many people have asked me about the legend of the duppy in my book that I felt I just had to do a special blog post on it.

The legend originates in Africa and lives on in the West Indies through the descendants of the slaves who were brought here hundreds of years ago. Some of the islands have different names for duppies such as rolling calf and bubby Susan. But in pretty much all of the Caribbean islands, certain facts remain consistent.

Duppies are believed to come about through the improper burial of bodies. Once they escape, they roam the earth for three days and can get into myriad activities including haunting one's enemies. They're rumored to live in cotton trees and to enjoy a good drink (talk about an eclectic spirit!)

Many of you may ask "what's the difference between a duppy and a ghost?" The main difference is that duppies are said to communicate with us while we sleep by manipulating our dreams. In Barbados when that happens, people say that they're being ridden by a duppy. When that happens, you wake up but your body gets stiff and you are rendered immobile. From there it's you against the duppy and you have to shake them off.

But that creepy stuff isn't entirely what the book is about. In my book the duppy is actually a good guy... of sorts.

Duppies are mythical spirits that many believe can either be good or bad. In my book, The Shadow Guardian, they represent both but with a twist. I took the idea of the duppy and fictionalized how it appeared in the book (many people were surprised by it and I won't go into that part too much here to avoid killing it for those of you who haven't read it).

I did it that way because I was fascinated with the premise that they represent one of our souls. The legend of the duppy believes that the soul leaves a deceased person's body for a reason and I again took creative license with that aspect of the legend. Why?

Because I felt like so many of us go about our day without any real burning desire. I know for sure that at one point I did. That's what actually inspired me to write the book - living without joy and love and excitement is a horrible existence.

So I breathed new life into the duppy by giving it a fresh purpose. The duppy was critical in the book to connect lots of themes such as hope and love. So often, we peg our dreams and ideal lifestyles on outside influences and material things. But let's be real; when you strip away all of that you come to grips with the fact that all we really need is what we can give ourselves. And once WE - not others - are happy and exude confidence and a genuine spirit, everything else falls into place. I don't advocate being selfish and forgetting other people. Far from. I'm just saying that we get what we give and if we give love and good vibes, then it comes back to us.

I've gotten a few e-mails and messages from people telling me that The Shadow Guardian gave them what they needed to get through a difficult time. I am genuinely glad that I was able to help in my little way. We face so many challenges everyday - from work to our love lives - that it's important to be able to get past all of the bad, dig deep and find the hope that lies within all of us.

I found mine and I hope you find your's.

I'll be honest. I haven't written a single word for my new book. (Technically in this case I don't even have a book - just an outline). So basically I just have unexpressed thoughts rolling around in my head that no-one else knows about but me.

A private book.

How wonderful.

The only thing I've written since releasing The Shadow Guardian is this blog. And lots of letters seeking publishers and agents. But I digress.

The reason I haven't written is because of life. A seemingly vague reason but a valid one all the same. Instead of writing I've been living.

In an effort not to be a starving artist I've worked. And I've paid bills. Did laundry. Cooked and snuck away from work to go swimming one afternoon.

All of these mundane tasks have been keeping me from my new passion. Writing is suddenly becoming a hobby for me and I think the self-deprecating comments I make on this blog are perhaps the only thing keeping me from feeling like I'll never write again.

I thought back today and tried to figure out when I used to find time to write before. Them I remembered that I had given up sleep and all forms of any kind of social life to work on my book. Suddenly I yearn for those 2AM sessions when I lost myself in my characters and my plot.

And it makes me beg the question: how do other writers find the time to write? We all have made huge sacrifices to get the point where we have been able to publish a book. I'd love to know just how everyone else manages to make time to pursue this noble undertaking we call writing when they have laundry, family and jobs.

So sound off and tell me just how you guys are able to make it work.

I'm really loving the fact that fashion and music from previous eras are being reinvented and lovingly embraced.

I'm a huge fan of earlier eras. So much so that I feel like I've become a retro junkie. I've filled my life with updated versions of the past.

Robin Thicke had a monster summer with "Blurred Lines"; that jam was my ring tone for two months. I'm also a serious fan of Lana del Rey and her musical nod to the 50s and 60s.
Let's not talk about the two pairs of 60s inspired sunglasses I've been rocking since September.
Or the awesome shift dress that has become a wardrobe staple.

So it leads me to wonder: why aren't we taking more inspiration from these decades?

We wear our cool clothes and never once give serious thought to the other elements that dominated those decades.

And even when they do, it seems they are just paying lip service to certain ideologies. Suddenly we're hearing people jump on this feminism band wagon to defend their persistent nudity. Wasn't the feminist movement defined by a mental revolution instead of a visual one?

Seriously, if women want to be considered as equal why do they constantly strip down? We don't see men doing that to make statements nearly as often as women do.

There are so many other ways to make poignant contributions to social discussion without flashing a boob (I'm looking at you, music stars).

Art is a major influencer of inciting sweeping social change. Why can't we send messages through our books, sculptures and movies that encourage more tolerance and better morals?

Why are we allowing a select few to mindlessly lead us? There used to be a time when the great thinkers and visionaries among us were hoisted on the shoulders of the people. Now we favour those who brandish their sexualities at us like smelly socks, rubbing our faces in it at every turn.

I really wish that every one who has a major platform to stand on would push for something other than bumping and grinding nude in public.

As much as we are evolving I feel that behaviour is reminiscent of Neanderthals at a cave party.
I can't help but to agree with Dr. Seuss when he rightly stated: 'They say I'm old-fashioned, and live in the past, but sometimes I think progress progresses too fast!'

It's a big deal, guys! My upcoming novel, "The Girl with Hazel Eyes" is a finalist for the JAAWP Caribbean Writer's Prize. I'm absolutely thrilled and I will be keeping you guys posted about how I fare in the competition. Whether I go the distance or end up self-publishing, I will definitely be bringing you this amazing Caribbean tale.

Here is an overview:


The book follows the life story of an author named Susan Taylor who grew up on the Caribbean island of Barbados. Her family was involved with the political processes that led to the island’s independence in 1966 when she was a teenager. During the time she had a non-committal intimate relationship that she didn’t properly define or acknowledge with a teenager boy from her neighbourhood. During that time, she also fell in love with the island’s first deputy prime minister, a misogynistic and self-centered man who only used her and everyone else to his advantage. She is aware of all of his criminal deeds. Their relationship turns sour after she suspects he played a part in her mother’s murder and realizes she’s pregnant with his child and after he announces that he has no interest in having the child, she seeks her revenge on him by publishing a diary that details all of his clandestine and illegal deeds. Knowing she would be cast out, Susan flees the island before the book is published but because the diary casts a bad light on the political party that her family helped to build, her entire family is subsequently exiled from Barbados. After that, there are many changes throughout the Caribbean’s political scene and a nasty nickname is born: “Pretty-eyed Susan”. Anyone called that is known as someone who can’t be trusted.
Forty years after the book was published, Susan - now an elderly lady - summons a young Barbadian writer named Lia Davis to her home in Florida and asks her to write her memoirs. The young girl is ambitious and seizes the opportunity believing that it will help her to become a successful writer. But time hasn’t been kind to Susan - she’s grown snarky and overbearing and makes Lia’s life unpleasant. What Lia doesn’t admit to Susan or herself is that she had taken Susan’s offer without hesitation because she too is running from aspects of her own life. Lia is surprised at how much her own life mirrors Susan’s but never says anything. As they spend time together, Lia grows to see another side of Susan and later realizes that Susan harbors a massive secret that impacts Lia’s life as well.

I've been getting tons of questions about my recent book, The Girl with the Hazel Eyes. Everyone has shown me so much love recently and I'll definitely be doing an Instagram series chronicling how the book came about and its development. So stay tuned.